


Who We Weren't

by Infinity_Pain



Category: Infinity Train (Cartoon)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Childhood Friends, Childhood Friends, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Growing Up Together, Idiots in Love, Kissing, Like a tiny reference to sex later in the story, Like tiny ones, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, No Train, Sad and Happy, Slow Build, Slow Burn, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, best friends to strangers to lovers, light swears, these kids I swear
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-05
Updated: 2021-03-05
Packaged: 2021-03-08 22:27:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 30
Words: 78,285
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27394225
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Infinity_Pain/pseuds/Infinity_Pain
Summary: Grace and Simon have good parents. Parents who love them and care about them and do what's best for them. Because of that, neither boards the train. But people have a funny way of ending up where they're supposed to anyway. Friendship, crushes, heartbreak, and reconciliation over the course of an eight year friendship.
Relationships: Simon Laurent & Grace Monroe, Simon Laurent/Grace Monroe
Comments: 114
Kudos: 43





	1. The Museum

Simon loved the museum. He loved all field trips of course, any excuse to get out of the overcrowded classroom with it’s gum incrusted desks and freezing cold temperature was a welcome one, but the museum was his favorite. He’d been going for as long as he could remember and he was sure he’d keep going until he was old. Simon stared at the scale model train that looked at him imposingly. It was only a replica of the real thing but it was a convincing one. 

Simon was sure that had he been a little younger, or a little more foolish, he could convince himself he had time traveled to when the thing was built. It’s shiny black coat of paint reflected a little of his face in a distorted manner and he stared at himself for a reason he couldn’t understand. Something about the train made him uncomfortable though he couldn’t place why. Maybe because it was a reminder of exactly how small he was.

Simon wished that he were older, or taller. He wished he was twenty instead of ten and could do what he wanted without being constantly reminded of how far he was from any amount of freedom. And so there Simon stood locked in an unwinnable staring contest with the train for a reason he couldn’t decipher. Simon heard a voice behind him and jumped.

“Are you okay?” Simon whipped around to look at the girl who asked him. She was taller than him, but he could tell she was his age. Her hair was in a puff on the top of her head tied with a red ribbon and she wore a plaid black and red skirt with a white blouse that had the name of her school emblazoned on it in cursive. Or at least he thought it was the name of her school, Simon couldn’t read cursive. He could tell from her appearance that she probably went to a fancy private school and the absolute put-togetherness or her outfit made Simon feel strangely self conscious about his outfit that his mom had forced him to wear.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Why do you ask?” he said casually. The girl smirked at him.

“Because you’ve been staring at that train for a long time.” she said shrugging before leaning against the railing next to him. “Is there something interesting about it?” she asked. Simon shook his head. 

“I just got distracted.” he muttered before changing the subject. “You know, my mom says I’m not supposed to talk to strangers.” he said matter of factly. This girl seemed alright from the outside but who knew what she was really up to.

“Well, my name is Grace, what’s your name?” she asked. Simon responded without thinking.

“My name is Simon.” he said. Grace cracked a smile.

“Well, then now we’re not strangers anymore. Anyway, are you here on a field trip too?” she asked. Simon nodded.

“Yeah, we have to travel in groups with our chaperones.” he explained. Grace looked around.

“Where are they?” she asked. In response Simon quickly scanned the room as panic set in. He’d been left by his group and now he was alone in a giant mesum that he didn’t know his way around and he was definitely going to be lost forever. Or even worse, he’d be found and would get in trouble for wandering off. It was truly a no win situation. He let out a groan. Grace looked at him. “You get lost?” she asked. He nodded in response.

“You too?” 

“Yep.” Now the both of them stood there by this train, both having lost their groups and having no way to find them. Despite this, Grace seemed oddly calm, even relaxed as she started walking off.

“Where are you going?” Simon asked, surprised and a little panicked. He didn’t want to lose the only other person he knew in this place. She looked at him surprised that he wasn’t on her wavelength. 

“They’ll come looking for us once they’ve realized that two kids are missing, and we’ll both be in major trouble whether they find us here or somewhere else, so we might as well have fun.” she said casually. “Are you coming with me?” she asked pointing at the sign that made reference to the planetarium. Simon knew nothing about this girl other than that her name was Grace, but Simon didn’t have that many friends. In fact, he had exactly two friends which was probably why no one noticed when he disappeared. 

Simon was quiet and introverted and he’d never have the guts to go up to a person he didn’t know and start up a conversation. But Grace did, she was cool, and interesting, and went to a private school which Simon found fascinating. She didn’t seem put off by the fact that he clearly looked less put together then her. She seemed kind of like she wanted to be his friend. Why anyone as outwardly interesting as Grace would want to be his friend escaped him but Simon didn’t want to question it.

“Alright, let’s go look at space!” he said with more enthusiasm then he meant to have. Grace giggled and Simon tried not to feel like she was laughing at him as the two walked along. Simon had never actually been inside the planetarium, it cost extra money and every time he’d gone he never had any to shell out for it. Considering the fact that Grace was cool and interesting she’d probably have some plan to sneak them in or something, or at least that was what he assumed.

“You don’t talk much do you Simon?” Grace asked and he realized that he probably hadn’t said anything for a long time. She probably thought that he was weird for just standing around in silence. “It’s okay, my other friends talk a lot, so I enjoy the change.” she said with humor in her voice.

“I’m just bad at thinking of what to say.” he offered in response. He did want to say something to prove that he wasn’t some quiet weirdo who stared at trains for way too long but he couldn’t think of anything to exonerate himself.

“I like your footwear. Socks and sandals are not a combination you see everyday.” she said somewhere in between sincere and joking. Simon let out another annoyed groan.

“My mom makes me wear them, she thinks that they’re practical.” he explained. “She read it in some magazine,” he added. Grace shook her head.

“You can’t let adults get a hold of magazines or newspapers, then they start getting ideas.” she said. Simon laughed at that. At that moment it was as if the two of them had known each other for years. They talked about their favorite shows and what ice cream flavors were way too overrated and about adults and how strange they were. The pair constantly got distracted checking out other exhibits and wasting tons of time. By the time they’d reached the planetarium Simon still didn’t understand why Grace, who still seemed impossibly cool, would talk to him; but at the very least he knew that he wanted her to keep being his friend.

Grace walked up to the man working the planetarium counter and Simon half expected her to act as a distraction so that they could sneak in. He was more stunned by what she actually did then he probably should have been. “Two tickets please.” she asked. The man told her the total and she pulled money from the wallet in her book bag, paid, and put the rest back. The man printed them the tickets and they went inside. Simon stared at her dumbfounded as she handed him a ticket.

“Where’d you get all that money from?” he asked her. Grace looked at him confused.

“My parents gave it to me for the field trip.” Simon still felt very confused about what had transpired as they took their seats to watch the show. They were basically the only people in the showroom so neither had any qualms about whispering. Simon watched in awe as the stars covered the room and just for a second he wondered if he’d actually been transported somewhere else. He watched the big bang occur in front of him and he was reminded again of how small he was. This time it felt more impressive than threatening.

“Wow.” he muttered so quietly he thought no one would hear. Grace nodded in response, she had a giant grin on her face.

“I love this part.” she said as the birth of a star was projected in front of them. Light coming from nothing, air and gas and light and noise colliding and making something. Simon did his best to wipe away the tears that he could feel coming. Sensitive was what his mother called him. A crybaby was the term most often used by his classmates. He couldn’t help it, it was beautiful, stars were beautiful. Just as the presentation ended in burst a very terrified looking teacher, who called out for Grace.

“Coming Ms. Nardella!” Grace said as she rushed quickly out of the theater. Simon didn’t see any teacher looking for him, nor did he see his group, so he did his best to quietly follow behind them without being noticed by the teacher. When the teacher looked away Grace gave him a nod that indicated he should stay with her. He nodded in response and followed the two out to where the rest of the students were gathered. After being thoroughly chewed out by teacher Grace sunk into the back of the group of students and Simon followed behind her. He didn’t actually blend in due to the whole lack of a uniform thing but he hoped that as long as he stayed quiet no one would notice.

“Do you see your school around?” Grace asked as they all shuffled out to where the buses were. Simon looked around trying to remember what bus that he’d come on but they all looked the same, the yellow of the buses having blended together. Finally he did manage to locate the bus he’d arrived on, just as it pulled away without him.

“It just left.” he said awkwardly. Simon was terrified at the idea of being stuck at this museum for who knows how long all by himself. Grace looked thoughtful for a moment before she snapped her fingers.

“I’ve got a plan, but you’ve got to stick close to me.” Simon nodded as the children of the school lined up and he clung to Grace like a liferaft as he snuck onto the bus, luckily being missed by the teachers initial headcount. As him and Grace snuck into seats in the back row Simon was struck by just how few children there were on the bus. On the bus ride he’d taken here they’d had to sit three to a seat, on this bus some seats were empty.

“Are the rest of the kids in your school sick or something?” he asked her. Grace raised an eyebrow and shook her head.

“This is half of the fifth grade class, the other half is on the other bus.” she responded. This shocked Simon even further.

“You guys have more than one bus?” he said surprised. Grace nodded once again. “Anyway, was your plan just to sneak me onto this bus?” he asked. “Because I still need to go home.” he said. Grace shook her head before giving her explanation.

“By the time we get back to school we’ll go straight home, it’s why I have my backpack. So my parents will be there to pick me up and they can call your parents. You do know your parents number’s right?” she asked. Simon nodded.

“Memorized by heart,” he explained. “Plus, the number for the vet, in case Archduke Franz Ferdinand needs medical attention.” he added. Grace burst out laughing, though he didn’t feel like she was laughing at him this time.

“I’m sorry, who?” she asked. Simon repeated.

“Archduke Franz Ferdinand. He was the monarch of Austria whose death led to World War One. It’s also the name of my dog.” he said. Grace looked at him with bemusement.

“First, why do you know that? Second, why would you name a dog that?” she asked. Simon shrugged.

“My mom told me about World War One a long time ago. Also, I didn’t name the dog; we got him when I was two, my parents named him.” he explained. Grace nodded.

“I’m sorry that I got you into this by the way. My teachers always come looking for me when I get lost so I figured yours would do the same.” She explained. Simnon shook his head.

“It’s not your fault. My mom says that because my school is underfunded the teachers don’t get paid enough to care about each kid as an individual, they’ve got to look at us as blocks.” he explained. Grace looked at him sadly and he figured that to someone who was used to being treated like an individual like Grace was that probably sounded awful. 

“Can’t you all just sue the school over that or something?” she asked. Simon shook his head at the question.

“Nope, court is expensive.” he explained repeating something he’d heard one of his parents say to the other after a car accident. Grace’s brow furrowed at this news that a negligent school would be let off the hook. Simon thought she was going to say something else but instead she changed the subject as the bus traveled back along its path to the school.

“Do you know how to play Concentration?” she asked. Simon shook his head. Grace lit up. “I’ll teach you, it’ll make this ride go faster.” And so the rest of the bus ride Grace taught Simon how to play and they spent the rest of the ride doing so. Simon felt oddly calm considering the fact that he was on a bus headed to who knew where and his mom was probably going to panic the second he wasn’t back at the school. The bus pulled up to the school and Simon snuck out behind Grace as he had when they’d gotten on. Grace scanned the parking lot looking for something before grabbing Simon’s arm and pulling him towards a limo.

“What are you doing? Some rich person is going to be very mad if I touch their car!” he said nervously. Grace rolled her eyes and dragged him along as she opened the limo’s door.

“How was the field trip Grace?” her mother asked her. Simon hid behind her still terrified. 

“It was good but I’ll tell you about it later, I made a friend!” she said, stepping aside to reveal Simon. Simon waved awkwardly at Grace’s parents who looked at him with confusion.

“I’m Simon.” he said quietly. Grace’s father’s phone buzzed and he looked at it inquisitively before turning back to Simon.

“Your last name wouldn’t happen to be Laurent would it?” he asked. Simon nodded in response. Grace’s mother checked her phone and sighed.

“Alright why don’t you both get in the car and Grace can explain to us what she’s doing with a child reported missing two counties over.” she said, frustration peaking in her voice. Simon climbed into the limo after Grace and did his best not to touch anything.

“Okay, I know this looks bad, but there is a perfectly reasonable explanation for all of this.” Grace began. Simon tried not to draw attention to himself and listened as Grace tried to rational the events that had taken place. By the end both of her parents had their heads in their hands. Grace’s mother handed Simon her phone.

“Can you call your mother and explain what has happened?” she asked. Simon nodded and did just that. 

“Hi mom, it’s me-” he began before being immediately cut off.

“Oh my god Simon you're alive I was worried sick! You are in so much trouble when you get home! I was terrified something happened to you! Never scare me like that again!” his mother went on like that for quite a while longer before finally asking him something. “What happened?”

“I was in the museum with a friend but we lost track of time and I missed my bus so I went with her.” Simon said. It sounded slightly better than how Grace had phrased it to her parents. He heard her breathe a sigh of relief over the phone. 

“Send me the address Simon.” she said, sounding tired. Simon put the receiver on mute.

“What’s the address?” Simon asked. Grace responded before her parents could.

“Well the address to our house is 8763 Monroe way.” Simon sent it to his mother. They exchanged I love you’s and she hung up. 

“Grace why did you share the house address instead of the school address?” her father asked exasperated.

“I didn’t think about it.” she explained. Her mother let out another deep sigh.

“What are we going to do with you Grace?” she asked. “Peirce, can you take us home please?” she said to the driver who obliged. As they arrived at Grace’s house Simon was caught completely off guard. It took every fiber of his being to not declare that Grace lived in a castle as they walked up the steps. The look of shock and awe must have been visible on his face however, as when they entered Grace excitedly grabbed his arm and his attention.

“Let me show you around the house!” she said happily before proceeding to drag Simon through every nook and cranny of the palace that she lived in and insisted on introducing him to every member of the house's staff. Simon honestly didn’t mind too much. He felt like he was a character in the movie Annie and he was fine with that. Besides, she was so excited to show him everything and her excitement was contagious. Eventually though, as all things, their tour of the house came to a close when Simon’s mother arrived.

“Mom!” he said running over to her and giving her a hug.His mother hugged back incredibly tightly, as if she was afraid that had she let go he would have gone up in a cloud of smoke. She finally let him go and stopped crushing his rib cage so that she could address Grace’s parents.

“Thank you Mr and Mrs…..” she paused and they gave her their last name.

“Monroe.” Grace’s mother said. Simon’s mother nodded in response.

“Right, thank you Mr and Mrs. Monroe, for watching Simon.” Grace, who had been standing near her parents, offered Simon a hug which he returned. 

“You're the first friend who’s ever been to my house.” she admitted. Simon was surprised by this, Grace seemed so cool and interesting that he had been sure she had friends over all the time. He rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly and responded.

“You’re the first friend who’s house I’ve been over.” he responded and the two laughed at their shared experience. The parents watched this display and it was Mr. Monroe who broke the silence.

“Why don’t we exchange numbers so these two can hang out again sometime?” he said. Simon’s mother nodded and the three exchanged contact information. Simon waved goodbye to Grace as him and his mother walked off to the car.

“Well, considering the heartache you put me through, did you at least have a good time?” his mother questioned. Simon nodded enthusiastically.

“Yeah, I made a friend.”


	2. The Rehearsal

“Grace wake up.” her mother said as she shook Grace attempting to wake her from slumber. Grace groaned and rolled over on her side trying to ignore the impending day of school she’d have to attend. 

“Five more minutes.” she muttered as she attempted to cover her face with a pillow. Her mother rolled her eyes and snatched the pillow from her before opening the windows leaving her exposed to the cruel sunlight that indicated sleep was over. Finally Grace let out a sigh and climbed out of bed.

“You're lucky it's me waking you up and not your father or else he would have blasted obnoxious music in your ear.” her mother joked. Grace shuddered at the idea of her father's awful old people music being the thing to wake her up.

“What day is it?” she asked, still wiping the sleep from her eyes.

“It’s Friday, you have practice after school so don’t forget to bring your shoes and clothes with you.” her mother reminded her before leaving the room. Grace lit up inside. She absolutely adored her dance practices on Fridays and she couldn’t wait to get there. Grace grabbed her school uniform and got dressed before going down stairs to where her parents were.

“Can I get my hair in braids before the recital?” she asked her father sweetly. 

“I don’t see why not-” he began before being swiftly caught by her mother.

“Grace, no braids until after the recital, and no asking your father when I already told you no.” she said. Grace internally pouted but let it go sitting down for breakfast with her family. “Have you two thought about what I’ll be getting for my birthday?” she asked playfully. Her parents rolled their eyes.

“Eat your breakfast and mind your business.” her father responded which Grace obliged. Grace was given a lift in the limo and her parents wished her a good day at school before she walked inside. Grace was fairly indifferent to school.The teachers were nice enough and she wasn’t stupid by any means. Her report cards were good and her parent teacher conferences were always glowing reviews. Still, she didn’t enjoy school either, it was boring and Grace hated being bored. She had friends at school but she didn’t know if they really counted as friends. She’d never invite any of them over to her house. 

“Hey Grace, can I borrow a pencil?” Layla asked. Grace pulled one from her sparkly pencil case and handed it over. She didn’t get a thank you and Grace didn’t need one. She was nice to people because she liked being nice to people. Since she was nice to them they were nice to her in return. Still, despite being well-liked and having what most people would consider school friends Grace felt like a bit of an outcast at her school. This place wasn’t where her real friends were, that was at her practices. The day breezed by without much event other than Jenny passing out chocolate ice cream for her birthday.

Grace was reminded of the conversation she’d had with Simon about how chocolate ice cream was awful and anyone who thought differently was lying to themselves. Grace wondered if Simon’s day was anything like her’s. From how shocked he’d been about her having money on the field trip and about how big her house was she’d concluded that Simon’s family probably was quite different from her’s. She knew that her parents had a lot of money but between their neighborhood and the school that she went to everyone had money so she’d never felt special in that regard.

Grace had felt kind of cool at having impressed Simon so easily. Moreover even if she hadn’t impressed him, Simon had impressed her in a weird way. Sure he was a bit quiet but that wasn’t a bad thing. Plus he’d cried when they were watching the stars and Grace thought that was interesting. She didn’t like to cry in front of people and neither did her parents, she’d never seen either of them do so. But Simon had cried in front of her and to Grace that was a big show of trust, even if to him it was probably very mundane. She hoped that the two of them would hang out together sometime.

She wanted to see his house and learn about his school. She wanted to be friends with him and because she was Grace she’d decided that she would be. At some point the final bell rang and dismissed her from school and Grace went to the parking lot and was picked up by Peirce. On Fridays her parents both worked late so they went with Peirce to pick her up from practice but she was picked up from school alone which she didn’t mind. Her parents loved her but Grace was often uninterested in answering questions about her school day when she’d just escaped from it.

“How was your day Pierce?” she asked if for nothing than a change of pace. Pierce regaled her with stories of driving diplomats and politicians around on the request of her parents. Grace didn’t care that much about her parents' work so they rarely told her about it. From what she’d pieced together from fragmented out of context comments and Peirce’s stories their jobs were to talk to boring old rich white people about whatever boring old rich white people talk about so that they could get money or something like that. Grace would never understand how a person could do that, how a person could work their entire life without creating.

Maybe her parents were creating and she just didn’t see it but she couldn’t imagine how. It saddened her to think that maybe one day she’d end up like that, spending her life engaging in boring small talk with people she didn’t really understand. She wanted to make art, to make music and to dance and sing even if she was only really good at one of those things. They arrived at the dance studio and Grace hopped out of the limo, leaving her book bag but taking her change of clothes. “Thank you Pierce.” Grace said as she was taught. 

“Of course Ms Monroe.” he said in an exaggerated accent that made Grace laugh. She closed the door and approached the studio happy to finally be with her people once again. Twice a week, once on Monday and once on Friday, Grace felt truly seen by her peers. She was with her friends, her real friends who she spent time with outside of rehearsal and who weren’t just nice to her because she was nice to them. As she entered and got changed she rushed over to talk to her best friend in the entire world Elisha. 

“Finally you're here! I thought I was going to have to be you for a day.” she joked. Grace responded.

“If you were me for the day then who would play you?” she asked curiously. Elisha shook her head.

“I didn’t think that far ahead, besides, it doesn’t matter since you did show up.” she responded. Grace laughed and finally felt at peace. Grace didn’t know that many other black girls, the result of living in a suburb that was very rich, very old, and very white, but she’d know Elisha for basically all of her life. They went to different schools so Grace only saw her during dance practices and during events at which both their families were in attendance, and even after all that time she’d never invited Elisha over to her house, but none of that mattered much to Grace, she was still her best friend.

“All right children, line up and get ready for warmups.” Ms Antonov announced. She was the instructor of the class and Grace both admired and feared her. She was the type of woman who was practically impossible to impress and said things like “There is no such thing as perfection.” to her class of fifth and sixth graders. To Grace that was a challenge more than anything and one she was happy to take. Grace would impress this woman and prove that perfection was real for no other reason than that she wanted to do it. Grace believed in perfection, she believed that she could make it real if she just worked hard enough.

The warmups finished and their instructor lined them up. “As you know next week we have a recital coming up and there is the coveted position of the principal dancer up for grabs. The title of principal dancer in the performance will be crucial, she will have to perform some of the most difficult moves that we’ve learned and she will be at center stage drawing audience attention. She will have to be excellent and after practice today those who wish to attempt for that spot may do so. Now let’s practice.” she announced. Grace knew that she had to have that role. She wanted it maybe more than she’d wanted anything in her life. 

But she knew that securing it wouldn’t be easy. This was a class of fifth and sixth graders and that meant there were girls who were older than her, who had an extra year of training, and who were likely more well versed in the art of performance. But Grace didn’t care, she’d set out to be perfect even if her instructor said that perfection was impossible, and she was going to prove it. She would prove that it was possible to be perfect and she’d secure the role and then show an entire audience of people that as well. As they rehearsed the routine they were to perform Grace did her best to ensure that each movement was on point down to the millimeter. After rehearsal had concluded Ms. Antonov commended them all.

“Good work today girls, we’ve only got two more practices before our performance so I expect this level of performance to not only stay consistent but to improve as well before our show.” They all nodded and the girls made their way to the bags they’d brought with them. Grace went over to grab her things as well but was stopped by her instructor. “Grace?” she said. Grace turned around nervously.“Great work today, almost perfect. I suggest you stay for the audition.” Grace felt like her heart might burst out of her chest with excitement. Not only had she been complemented, she’d also been directed to stay.

She practically ran over to where Elisha was preparing to leave. “Are you staying for tryouts?” she asked. Grace nodded frantically.

“I think I have a chance at the spot.” she explained trying to project an air of smugness that completely melted into unbridled joy. Elisha gave her a smile.

“Good luck.” she told her before they exchanged a hug and Elisha left. Now it was just Grace and two sixth grade girls. Lauren and Abigail. Grace didn’t know that much about them, they were nice but mostly stuck together rather than hang out with the other girls. Grace knew they would be good though and this was a theory that was confirmed watching each of them audition. Movements were delicate and accurate. Every twirl, every jump was fluid and gorgeous. Almost perfect was what came to Grace’s mind as a descriptor. 

She knew that the only thing that beat almost perfection was perfection itself. Grace knew that she wasn’t perfect, she figured that no one was one hundred percent perfect. But perfection was possible, she could be perfect at this. She took the stage when her name was called and did her best to keep herself calm. She could do this, she could be perfect for just this moment. Grace wasn’t sure how it happened, maybe pure confidence had been injected into her veins, but as she performed Grace felt like she was demonstrating perfection. She watched the faces of the other girls and of her instructor and used them as fuel to do better.

When she finished she held her breath and waited. Finally her Ms. Antonov spoke. “I think that you have demonstrated some of the best work I’ve seen in my years of instructing Grace. I would like to offer you the role of principal dancer.” Grace wanted to jump up and down and scream but instead she happily nodded and accepted the role.

“You did amazing Grace!” Abigail had complimented her.

“Thank you! Both of you definitely made it hard on me.” she said sincerely. They had talked a little while longer before heading out to their cars and Grace was greeted by her parents as she entered the limo.

“How was practice?” her father asked. Grace was sure that he knew the answer from the gigantic smile plastered on his face.

“It was great! I auditioned for the lead dancer!” she responded happily. Her mother looked at her daughter with pride.

“How did you do?” she asked her already knowing what Grace’s answer would be.

“I did perfect.”


	3. The Cafeteria

Simon knew he’d have to get out of bed and get on the bus eventually. It didn’t mean he was in any hurry to do it. Maybe he could just stare at his ceiling and fall back asleep and he wouldn’t have to go to school. Of course that plan wasn’t one that would be successful. Soon after, his mother walked in and tapped him gently to indicate that he’d need to get up.

“Simon? Simon wake up.” she said in the soft gentle voice she used for waking him up and calming him down. Simon felt guilty that he was making her use that voice on him because he hadn’t gotten up on time but he certainly didn’t feel guilty enough to actually get out of bed and go to school.

“I can’t go to school today.” he muttered before turning over on his side, away from his mother to stare out of the window. He hoped that she would buy it even though he knew that she wouldn’t. Archduke Franz Ferdinand, curious about why everyone was in one room trotted over, climbed onto Simon’s bed lying near him. Tiredly Simon gave the dog a pat for being a good boy and attempted to go back to sleep.

“Simon, why can’t you go to school?” his mother asked tiredly. Simon did his best to think of an excuse that wasn’t the real answer. The real reason he didn’t want to go to school was that he had only two friends and both of them liked each other more than they liked him. The real reason was that everyone else tolerated him at best and actively mocked him at worst, either because he was a crybaby, or because he dressed like a dork. But he didn’t want his mother to know that, or anyone to know that for that matter, so he said something else.

“I can’t go to school because I’m sick.” was the reason that he landed on. He hoped that his mother would accept this and just leave him to wallow in his sorrows with the company of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. He rolled back over on his side and to his surprise his mother did get up and start heading for the door. But before she left his room she made one last bid.

“It’s too bad you’re sick because Grace and her family invited you to come over after school. But I guess since you're sick I guess I’ll have to tell them you can’t come.” Simon finally sat up in bed. Grace was so cool and interesting and her house was huge. Simon figured that he would never see Grace again but she’d invited him over and actually wanted to hang out with him. If hanging out with Grace was a possibility maybe going to school would actually be worth it.

“I actually feel a lot better now.” Simon said climbing out of bed. His mother gave him a once over and unsure look.

“I don’t know, you seemed pretty sick just a minute ago.” she said teasingly. Simon shook his head.

“I’m fine now I promise; I’m going to get ready for school.” he said. His mother gave him a pat on the head and exited his room. Simon decided to get ready for school and looked through his closet for what to wear. Grace was wearing a school uniform when he’d met her and Simon wondered if school uniforms were better. On the one hand there was no need to think about what you wore everyday but on the other hand Simon thought it would be boring if everyone wore the same thing. Although Simon probably wasn’t one to talk in regards to this subject as he basically wore the same thing everyday already without being forced.

Well, without being forced by the school. He was definitely forced by his mother. After getting ready he rushed downstairs and grabbed a bowl of cereal for breakfast, eating as fast as he could so as not to miss the bus.“Don’t eat so fast, you’ll get milk all over your shirt.” his mother warned. Simon continued to scarf down fruit loops at a rapid pace before exiting out of the house.

“Bye mom I love you!” he called behind him a sentiment which his mother returned. Simon arrived at the bus stop as the bus pulled up and got on doing his best to keep his eyes down and to get to the back of the bus without issue. Someone stuck their foot out and Simon almost tripped but narrowly managed to avoid falling and he made his way to the back of the bus without much fanfare. As he sat in the back row Simon tucked his legs to his chest and tried to look unassuming. He stared out the window and reminded himself that he just had to get through this school day and then he’d be able to hang out with Grace.

Simon wished that he and Grace went to the same school. He was sure that if they did and people saw that he was friends with someone as awesome as Grace no one would ever pick on him again. After all, Simon couldn’t imagine anyone being mean to her, she was too cool. But unfortunately Simon would never attend a fancy private school and Grace would never go to his lame overcrowded public school. So in short, Simon was trapped here at least until he stopped exhibiting the traits that his peers considered joke worthy. Simon just hoped that this day wouldn’t go on too long.

Mostly it didn’t. In fact Simon was surprised by how quickly lunch arrived and he got to take his brown paper bag from his book bag and eat. When he entered the cafeteria he wasn’t surprised to see that his friends were already at their usual table in the back corner where no one came. Simon sat down and dumped the contents of his lunch on the table. A ham sandwich, a pudding cup, a bag of plain potato chips, a capri sun, and a note from his mother. As he began eating he noticed his friends whispering about something to each other. Simon felt his stomach tie in knots though he didn’t know why.

“What are you two talking about?” he asked. Jacob looked over at him and answered.

“We’re going to hang out together after school. I would have invited you but my mom said I can only have one friend over.” He explained. Simon felt deeply hurt but did his best to ignore it. Honestly he kind of wanted to cry but he was not giving the people that bullied him any more ammo than they already had. Still, it was painful to be told by the only friends that you had that they saw you as the most disposable member of the group. Simon chewed on his ham sandwich and came up with a response. Doing his best to sound unaffected Simon put on a front.

“That’s fine. I couldn’t come anyway since I'm going over to my other friend's house today.” he said. Both looked at him surprised and with suspicion.

“Are you really?” Tyler asked. Simon nodded still trying to look disinterested in their friend group. Simon had other friends. Or, more accurately he had one other friend. But that other friend was in his opinion way cooler than his current friends and so he refused to be visibly upset about this.

“Yeah, she's super cool and rich, so I’ll be at her house after school.” they both gave him a look that indicated they didn’t really believe him and Simon figured that it was probably fair. He wouldn’t believe himself either. He finished lunch and waited for this day to be over so that he could go hang out with someone who didn’t make him feel like a second tier friend even if that was likely what he was to her. Finally the day did end and he was greeted by the arrival of his mother after school rather than having to board the bus. Not having to take another stress filled bus ride meant that for Simon this day was looking up already.

On the drive up to the Monroe’s house his mother gave him a rundown of how to behave. “Now, if they offer you something just assume they're being nice and refuse. Don’t ask for any food over there, we have food at home. Be polite, don’t break anything, and have fun.” that last one seemed more tacked on at the end than anything to Simon but he didn’t mind. As they pulled up to the gate blocking the Monroe’s driveway the guard buzzed them in and Simon climbed out of the car. Him and his mother headed towards the Monroe’s doorstep but found the door flung open even before they reached it.

It was Grace who had opened the door so excited to be reunited with the friend that she’d made under such strange circumstances. “You’re here!” she said excitedly. Her parents arrived and after admonishing her for opening the door without permission they let the two in. While the adults talked about details Grace quickly began talking to Simon. “I finally have another person to play Just Dance with!” she said happily. Simon gave her a confused look.

“What’s Just Dance?” he asked. Grace looked at him as if he’d asked her what water was. After staring at him absolutely appalled she finally gave a response.

“Just Dance is the best game in the world and I can’t believe you’ve never played it. Next you’ll be telling me you’ve never played any flash games.” Simon shook his head to indicate that he’d never played those either. Grace looked absolutely horrified, and then excited. “I have so much to teach you.” she said, grabbing his hand. Seeing that the two were about to run off Simon’s mother spoke to him.

“Have a good time!” she called after them. Grace showed Simon her room and he was taken aback. An abundance of toys, a giant canopy bed, a flat screen tv, plus a video game console hooked up to it, all resided in Grace’s bedroom. Simon was sure that this was the height of luxury. He almost didn’t want to touch anything for fear of disturbing the atmosphere of the room with his utter out of placeness. Grace didn’t seem to feel the same as she casually flopped onto the bed kicking off her shoes and turned on the tv. Simon cautiously sat next to her.

“Alright, allow me to educate you on what is undoubtedly the best game of all time, Just dance.” she said switching the channel to the one outputting the game. After a brief explanation of how to play Simon felt confident enough to try.

“You’re not allowed to make fun of my awful dancing okay?” he asked. Grace nodded in response.

“I won’t.” she said. Simon looked at her seriously.

“You have to promise.” Simon didn’t want to be made fun of by anyone considering he got enough of that in school already. Grace looked at him equally seriously.

“I, Grace Katherine Monroe, hereby solemnly swear that I will never make fun of your dancing.” she said. Simon nodded but then asked her a question.

“Why did you say it like that?” he asked. Grace shrugged.

“That’s how people make promises on tv.” was her response. “Now, time for Just Dance.” Grace picked a song and Simon did his best to keep up. He was honestly pretty bad at it but he found himself having fun despite that. And in addition, Grace was really good at the game, scarily good. After they’d completed an entire album's worth of songs Simon finally declared Grace the ultimate Just Dance champion before collapsing on the floor in exhaustion. “Don’t die on me yet, I’ve still got to teach you about flash games.” she explained. Simon let out a groan from the floor.

“Please tell me that these games involve less movement.” he begged. Grace chuckled and nodded.

“They do.” she said switching off the console and looking for something in her closet. Eventually she dug out a laptop from the back of the thing and started it up. Simon sat next to her on the floor as she gave him a tour of games from all around the internet. The only computer Simon had in his house was the old desktop that his mother used for work. He wasn’t allowed to touch it much less to play games on it so the internet was a bit of a mystery. Grace seemed well versed in it however and happily showed off strange websites and interesting games that Simon didn’t really get but enjoyed nonetheless.

He decided that he liked Grace, that she was fun to be around and that he wanted to continue being around her. She didn’t make him feel stupid or weird or like a loser because he didn’t exactly fit in. “Thank you for being nice to me.” Simon muttered quietly. Grace looked at him surprised but ultimately gave him a kind look in response.

“Of course I’m nice to you, you’re my friend.” she said. Simon didn’t want to tear up at that. He didn’t want to be a sensitive cry baby like everyone said he was but he couldn’t help it. He spent his days at school feeling like a dork who nobody liked, not even his friends. But Grace liked him, Grace was his friend. Simon decided he’d do his best to be the most awesome friend in the world to pay her back for it. Grace gave him a hug to comfort him and the moment passed. The two spent the rest of their time hanging out and eating junk food and being friends. For maybe the first time ever, Simon felt like he had a friend who would be there for him.


	4. The Recital

Grace and Simon sat casually in the living room of Simon’s home. His mother had been nice enough to invite Grace over that Friday afternoon and she’d been excited to go. Simon’s house was very different to hers, but Grace liked the atmosphere nonetheless. Currently both sat cross legged on the carpet while some show neither was watching played in the background. Rather, the two were playing Go Fish together and casually snacking on the peanut butter crackers that Simon’s mother had given to them. 

“I can’t believe you’d never had peanut butter crackers before.” Simon said as he looked over his cards. “Got any eights?” Simon asked. Grace shook her head.

“They were just never something I’d eaten. But they’re good. Also no, go fish.” she responded. Simon sighed and drew from the deck adding another card to his rapidly growing collection.

“You have to be cheating, there’s no way you’ve beaten me five times in a row.” he said frsuated. Grace shook her head and chuckled.

“It’s not my fault you’re bad at the game. Got any queens?” she asked. Simon handed them over. “Queens for the queen and that makes my sixth win in a row.” she said happily. Simon rolled his eyes.

“You got lucky is all. Anyway, are you staying for dinner?” he asked. Grace shrugged. “I’ll ask my mom.” he said getting up and walking off. Simon was a great friend and Grace was glad to have him. Of course she had plenty of friends in her dance class including her best friend in the entire world but Simon was different from them, he was different from her. Maybe that was why she enjoyed his company so much, he introduced her to things like peanut butter crackers and Go Fish and other stuff she might not have learned about otherwise. Plus, he was funny, even if he was really bad at losing. She looked around the room hoping that its decor might tell her something about her friend.

It was fairly plain as living rooms go. The room had lots of family photos of Simon and his mother. It also had some of Simon, his mother, and the man Grace was sure was Simon’s dad. They looked a lot alike and Grace wanted to ask about him but her parents had always warned against being nosey. Though, considering that they still had pictures of him Grace concluded that he probably hadn’t abandoned them or anything. Still, she found it odd that she’d been to Simon’s house multiple times and he’d been over to hers just as much if not more and she’d still never seen this man. Moving on from that Grace noticed a piano in the corner of the room.

Simon reentered the room and restated what he’d been told. “She said it’s alright if you want to stay for dinner which means I have plenty more time to make a comeback at Go Fish.” Grace laughed at his comment and responded.

“Just give up, you’re never going to beat me.” she responded before changing the subject. “What’s with that piano, does anyone in your family play?” she questioned. Simon looked sheepish.

“My mom makes me take lessons, but I'm not very good.” Grace’s face filled with excitement.

“You have to play something for me!” she said happily. It was less of a request and more of a demand. Grace took violin lessons every other week and while she loved it, she’d always wondered if she should have asked her parents to learn the piano instead. Simon, recognizing that he was going to have to play whether he liked it or not, sat down on the bench and began plunking away on the keys. Grace didn’t know what song he was playing but it sounded beautiful if not a little clumsy. He played the song till the ending and Grace listened with interest as the piano produced the notes. 

“That song is from a movie. What did you think?” he asked nervously. “I haven't been to lessons in a while so I’m a little rusty.” he muttered. Grace gave him a big smile. She didn’t know why Simon doubted himself at this, he’d done a good job.

“I thought it sounded beautiful.” she responded. Simon looked embarrassed at the compliment and was about to play it off when the barking of Archduke Franz Ferdinand startled them both. A yell came from the kitchen.

“Don’t worry kids it’s just the pizza man!” Simon’s mom yelled as an explanation of the dog’s sudden outburst.The two rushed over to grab the pizza and were both prevented from taking it back with them into the living room, being forced instead to sit and eat at the table by Simon’s mother.

“Do you want to come back over tomorrow? I can show you the chart of the stars I made!” Simon said. Grace looked impressed before her face dropped.

“I can’t, I have a dance recital tomorrow.” she explained. Simon didn’t seem phased by the news that she couldn’t come over tomorrow and was more interested in the contents of what she’d said.

“You’re a dancer? I guess I should have expected it by how good you were at the game but still; what kind of dance do you do?” Grace hadn’t expected Simon to be at all interested nor did she expect him to have enough knowledge about dance to know it wasn’t a monolith.

“I do ballet.” she said. Simon looked impressed.

“I bet you're the best ballerina ever, like the queen of ballerinas.” he said seriously. Now it was Grace’s turn to be embarrassed at a compliment.

“I wouldn’t say I was the best…” she said trying to sound modest. Simon shook his head and rejected her idea outright.

“You’re the best at everything, so it makes sense that you're the best at ballet too.” he said self-assuredly. Grace figured that Simon wasn’t going to change his mind on that so she let it go. Besides, it was nice to be told that you were the best at something, especially for Grace who was striving for perfection.

“Maybe you and your mom can come watch my recitical.” she offered. Simon looked excited at the idea. 

“That would be fun, I’ve never been to a ballet before,” he explained. Grace nodded as she picked the sausage off of her pizza and fed it to Archduke Franz Ferdinand who sat begging at her feet.

“I’ll have to ask my parents, but I think you all have secured yourselves an invite.” she responded. The rest of the evening was fairly uneventful and around eight Grace was picked up by her parents and driver. After a brief conversation with Simon’s mother it was confirmed that both could attend and Grace felt excited on the drive home. All of her other friends were in the performance, and her parents would be the only people in the audience for her. But, now that Simon and his mother were coming Grace had extra faces to look out for in the crowd. She decided that it would be her best performance ever if for nothing other than to prove Simon’s claim about her being the best at everything right.

As they rode home Grace posed a question to her parents. “My birthday party is next week so I know it’s a bit late to ask but can I have a cellphone for my birthday?” Both of her parents looked at her before her father started chuckling and her mother burst out laughing. Grace felt her face grow hot with embarrassment at being laughed at.

“No Grace, you cannot have a cell phone.” her mother responded after having calmed down from her laughing fit. 

“Why not?” Grace asked earnestly. “Everybody has one.” she said to her own defense. Her father responded quickly.

“Because we aren't everybody’s parents Grace, we’re your parents and we say no.” he explained. Internally Grace pouted but she knew that they’d just tell her to fix her face so she let it go. She knew her parents loved her even if they frustrated or confused her sometimes. She figured that she was at the very least lucky to have parents who cared enough about her to say no. She had plenty of kids in her school whose parents were so busy that they rarely saw them, or that didn’t care enough about them to stop them from doing awful things. After they’d arrived home Grace went to bed and contemplated her parents and about her upcoming performance and Simon. 

When Grace woke the next morning she went downstairs for breakfast and was reminded of her schedule for the day by her mother. “You’ve got violin lessons in an hour and that will last until twelve. At one you’ve got your final practice before the recital and that will be over at three. I scheduled a hair appointment for four and that will take an hour so you’ll be out at five, then the recital starts at six so we’ll be there at five-thirty.” she said listing things off. If she hadn’t been prepared or wanted these things Grace figured she’d probably be mad at having such a full schedule. However, she was Grace Monroe, she had the ability to achieve perfection and today she’d take care of everything.

After breakfast with her parents she was showered and dressed in time for her violin lesson. She was worse at the violin than she was at dancing but she still enjoyed it despite the occasionally sour note that was pulled from her strings. She did her best and her best was improving all of the time, something which her teacher noted. Before the lesson ended Grace asked her instructor a question. “Do the piano and the violin sound good together?” she asked as her teacher smiled.

“Yes they do, why do you ask?” Grace shrugged.

“No reason.” she responded. After that it was off to the final rehearsal before the performance. Grace was so focused that she barely even spoke to Elisha which she did feel bad about but she was the primary dancer, she couldn’t afford distractions, even if those distractions were her friends. After rehearsal she caught up with Elisha. “I’m sorry for not talking to you, I’m just trying to do my best not to mess up. I promise I’ll talk to you after the show.” Elisha smiled a little at this and accepted her apology.

“Okay Grace, but you better not start getting stuck up just because you got the lead.” she said teasingly. Grace scoffed at this.

“I would never get stuck up.” she responded equally joking. After that she was brought to the salon to get her hair done. It had to be done up for the performance and while Grace loved wearing different hairstyles, she hated the actual process of getting her hair done. She sat in the chair and squirmed away from the comb like it was poison and had to be reminded a million times to keep her head still. When the flatiron was brought out she had every urge to run away as fast as she could but Grace knew that plan wouldn’t work. It was a battle to keep still but eventually that had been finished and her hair was tied up into a bun, secured with a ribbon the same color as her outfit, an almost blinding white.

After having her hair completed it was finally time to be brought to where the performance was being held. The building was huge and quite nice to look at in Grace’s opinion but she wasn’t given much time to admire the architecture of the building before being hustled inside along with the rest of her class. As Grace peaked out at the stage realized it was larger and more extravagant than the one which they practiced on which she’d expected, but the change was still massive. It looked beautiful and dignified, like something a real ballet company would perform on rather than just a class of wealthy middle schoolers. As she changed into her outfit and prepared to go out and perform Grace took deep breaths. 

Grace figured she should have been more scared than she was. There was an audience of people out there who were going to watch her, who would see if she failed. But she couldn’t bring herself to be nervous. Tonight wasn’t about any of those people, tonight was about her. Tonight she was out to prove perfection, to make every movement precise and calculated in the best possible way. Tonight she was out to live up to the name that she’d been given ten years ago on the date of February 28th. Tonight, even for just a moment, she would achieve the epitome of expression through dance. The curtain rose and darkness enveloped the audience as the stage lights engulfed her. 

She wasn’t Grace Katherine Monroe in the moment that she heard her music cue, she was something else. A feeling, a moment, an expression. Grace was every twirl, every leap, every en pointe. And at the same time she was none of that. She could hear her heart pounding in her ears and used it to keep time. She was never more free, more alive then when she was here, on stage, becoming the art which she wanted to create. She wasn’t sure how but she wanted to do this forever, to be this forever. Maybe she’d stay here and be like her instructor teaching others the gift. Or maybe she’d travel around the world and perform on a stage in every country that would have her. 

She didn’t know and she didn’t care, Grace leapt and she was flying. But as all things performances came to an end. The music stopped and Grace took her bows along with the rest of her class and the sound of her heart in her ears faded as it was replaced by the claps from the audience. Grace scanned the audience and found Simon and his mother seated next to her parents and smiled at him. Between the lights and clapping it was hard to tell but she was sure he’d seen it. They dismounted the stage and Grace ran over to where her people sat.

“You did amazing!” her mother announced. Her father wore a grin on his face that told her he was about to say something utterly embarrassing.

“Downright graceful.” he said and Grace tried and failed to be mad at the stupid joke. She turned to address the Laurents.

“Your performance was lovely.” Mrs. Laurent said to her and Grace thanked her for the compliment.

“I brought you these.” Simon said, offering her a bouquet of flowers. The price sticker was still on them and Grace chose to ignore it. “I knew I was right about you being the best at everything.” he said jokingly. Grace smiled at this.

“Why don’t we get a picture of you two?” Grace’s father asked and the two stood next to each other, Grace holding her flowers as he took the photo. He showed it to her and Grace was pleased at how it turned out.

“Can you print that out? I want to keep it.” she explained. Her father nodded and Grace looked at her flowers again with a smile. Tonight, she felt utterly perfect.


	5. The Birthday Party

As Grace yawned and stretched she remembered what day it was as threw off the covers ready to start the day. Her birthday came second only to Christmas in terms of days she was actually excited to wake up for. Today wasn’t her actual birthday of course, that had been on Thursday and as was tradition on her actual birthday she and her parents went out to a nice dinner which was fine. That was not the day Grace looked forward to however as on the saturday after her birthday Grace got to have a party and this year she was having it at her house.

They would have tea, listen to music, watch movies, and of course, enjoy cake and ice cream. Grace had invited her entire dance team plus Simon and this would be the first time that any of her friends besides Simon had been to her house. Simon had been impressed with her home when they weren’t expecting company, she knew his and her friends' minds would be blown when they saw what it looked like when company was expected. Of course, they would not be arriving for a while and Grace had other things to attend to.

First, was to go downstairs and have breakfast. Grace didn’t bother changing out of her pajamas as she didn’t want to put on the outfit she’d wear to the party until right before guests arrived to keep it clean. She also knew her parents wouldn’t say anything about eating breakfast in sleeping clothes because today was her birthday. Yesterday, as promised her mother had taken her to get box braids done because Grace had requested braids on her birthday and unlike her request for a cell phone it had not been met with laughter. She sat down for breakfast and was pleased to find that along with her favorites of waffles, eggs and bacon, a card and a birthday gift sat at her place.

“Happy birthday, Grace.” her mother said before her parents launched into a rendition of happy birthday. Grace never knew what you were supposed to do while someone sang you happy birthday. Mostly she just sat there smiling awkwardly and desperately wanting to check in the box. She knew her parents wouldn’t get her a phone after they’d told her no but it didn’t stop her from hoping. After they finished Grace opened the card which was signed by the both of them and filled with the normal sappy stuff parents write in cards for their children about watching them grow up into such beautiful young people. After thanking them for the card Grace opened her present to find that it was an ipod.

“Thank you!” Grace said happily. It was exactly a phone but it was close and now she could listen to her music. It had a light green case, which Grace thought was stunning. She liked softer pastel colors, she found them pretty. After receiving her birthday gift Grace was happy to eat her breakfast and prepare for the upcoming day. The house had to be decorated to her exact specifications, that being an English tea garden. She would like to go to a real one someday especially considering that her mother's side of the family lived in England but considering that it was February and therefore too cold for anything to grow in a garden an indoor rendition of one would have to do. 

So instead their home would be themed like one. Grace had also asked that all of her guests wear attire fitting of the occasion. She wanted this day to be special and fun, an event befitting of the girl who’d been proclaimed the best at everything. And so she marked where she wanted certain flowers and how tables were to be placed and where each guest was to sit. She brought her list of foods that people were allergic to, to the kitchen staff. Simon can’t have shellfish, Abigail can’t have tree nuts, etc. Then she of course had to direct the decor, she wanted lace placemats and fine china for her guests' usage, only the best. She had menus printed on the best stationary as well, the kind stolen from her father's home office. Seeing how everything came together Grace wondered if she should abandon her dreams of ballet and become a party planner instead.

This wasn’t a serious thought of course, Grace would never give up ballet for anything. But it had been fun to organize. After that was done Grace decided it was close enough to the party to allow for her to change into her dress. It was a flowery spring dress that reminded her of the outfits she saw people wear when they went to church. She’d liked it however and thought it appropriate for her party so it was what she’d wear. After getting dressed she had her mother style her braids into a bun as she thought it matched nicely with her attire. Shortly after she could hear her guests arving and Grace decided to be the one to welcome them.

The first to arrive was Simon. He had on a sport jacket and some nice, none khaki pants which Grace appreciated. This was the most dressed up she’d ever seen Simon and considering that his normal attire was a sweater vest and khakis she considered it an upgrade, even if he was a little underdressed for her tastes.

“Welcome to my party, I’m glad you could make it.” she said, trying to sound mature and professional before breaking and giving Simon a hug. “It’s great to see you not wearing a sweater vest.” she said jokingly. Simon gave a smile and shook his head.

“Don’t get used to it, you haven't even seen half of my ever-expanding sweater vest collection.” he responded before gesturing to his gift, which was poorly wrapped making it even more endearing to Grace. “Where should I put this?” he asked. Grace gestured over to the area labeled gift table. Simon gave her a nod and headed off just as her next guest arrived. This time it was Elisha who wore a dress similar to Grace’s although less flowery.

“Well if it isn’t the lead ballerina,” she said jokingly. “Have you gotten stuck up yet?” she asked. Grace laughed in response.

“In your dreams.” she said. Elisha began to say something else but then looked over at Simon placing his gift on the table and posed Grace a question.

“Who is that kid? Did your parents make you invite him or something?” she asked. It was a fair question as many times Grace had been forced to attend parties of some kid she didn’t know who didn’t want her there for the sake of her parents' job. And seemingly as Elisha knew that Grace was only really friendly with the members of her dance class she couldn’t think of any other reason this kid would be here. Grace gave her the rundown on the reality of the situation.

“That’s Simon, he’s my friend.” she explained. Elisha raised an eyebrow in response as Simon shuffled away from the table awkwardly, clearly trying not to touch anything.

“When did you too start hanging out?” she asked. Grace shrugged.

“The beginning of the month or so. Don’t worry, I know he’s not exactly like the people we’re typically friends with, but he’s great.” she explained. Elisha gave her a nod in response indicating that she was electing to trust Grace on this one and walked over to place her present alongside Simon’s. The rest of the guests filled in shortly after all thanking Grace for the invite in their spring dresses and placing their gifts on the table. After everyone had been gathered they were ushered into the dining area that had been completely transformed into a solid apromination of a tea garden, just as Grace had hoped. The atmosphere was impeccable of course but what Grace was most proud of was the seating arrangement.

She knew all about the complicated web of friendships, uneasy alliances, and outright rivals that resided in her dance class and she’d been sure to seat everyone in a way that minimized tension between people. And of course, since it was still her birthday she’d had Simon and Elisha seated next to her as she felt her best friend and her almost best friend should be seated next to her. Menus were passed out and the chef came out to take orders. As everyone placed their tea orders Grace felt a tap on her shoulder and turned to a nervous Simon.

“I don’t know anything about tea, what should I order?” he asked. Clearly he didn’t want to mess up in front of Grace and her group of very sophisticated friends. Grace gave Simon a calming look to indicate that she’d make sure he wasn’t embarrassed and whispered to him.

“Ask for a cup of mint tea and specify that you want it loose leaf, it tastes good and you’ll look impressive.” she explained. Simon gave her a grateful nod and did just that when his time came to order. Then it was Grace’s turn of course.

“And for the birthday girl?” the chef asked.

“Jasmine green please.” she said which the chef scribbled down before heading off into the kitchen. Some of the girls talked to each other about unrelated things which Grace didn’t mind, it gave her time to better introduce her two closest friends. “So, Simon, this is Elisha. She’d been my friend since forever.” she explained. Simon gave Eisha a smile which was returned albeit a bit more cautiously. 

“So, how did you and Grace meet?” she asked. 

“I got lost in a museum and Grace helped me get home.” he said, simplifying the story quite a bit. She nodded and the tea came out in time to save the conversation from getting anymore stale and boring. Simon took a sip of his tea and seemed pleased about it’s flavor which Grace felt proud about. Grace tapped him and got his attention.

“Tuck your pinky in, you don’t actually have to stick it out, that’s just a myth.” she said, demonstrating. He did as she said and tucked his pinky back in. After tea and lunch it was time for gifts. Each gift was bought out and presented to Grace as she sat at the head of the table. All of them were quite nice, most being jewelry and dolls, which Grace collected. Her favorite however had been the last gift she’d received. As Simon had been the first to arrive his gift had been at the bottom of the pile and therefore the last she’d received. She tore apart the poorly done gift wrapping to find a copy of the second Just Dance in her hands.

“I saw that you had the first one and the third one but not the second one so I found it.” he explained. Grace smiled and tried not to let how much she adored the gift show. 

“Thank you, I love it.” she said. After cake and ice cream many of the girls had to go home, however an agreement had been made that Simon was able to stay over a bit longer. 

“So, do you want to open the game and start playing right now?” he asked. Grace chuckled and shook her head.

“I’m starting to think you only got me this game because you wanted to play and I’m the only friend you have with a console.” she said teasingly. Simon looked fake offended.

“I would never do something like that.” he said. Grace shook her head and the two decided to watch a movie. It was the Disney classic “The Princess and the Frog” which Grace considered to be by far the best princess movie. She could tell that Simon was pretending not to enjoy the songs but he couldn't hide his investment by the end. However, with only a bit longer left in the film they were abruptly called to the dining room by her parents. Upon entering Grace noticed that the house's entire staff was gathered. They all stood around muttering and Grace waited to be told what was happening.

“Now, as you all may have seen outside or on the news, there is a major storm happening currently. All current forecasts indicate that it will be continuing through the night and that it won’t let up until morning. As a result it would be far too dangerous to drive and while all of you have the choice to leave if you so chose we are offering anyone who does not want to attempt the drive home a place to stay for the night.” Grace’s mother explained. There was muttering amongst the staff and Grace hoped that no one would attempt to drive and get hurt. Silently, Simon raised his hand. 

“Yes, Simon?” her father asked.

“What about me?” he said. Her father gave an explanation. 

“When the news of the storm arrived we called your mother and after a long discussion we agreed it would be best for you to stay here for the night.” Simon looked surprised and a little nervous but Grace was ecstatic.

“Yes! Grace and Simon sleepover!” she said excitedly. As always her excitement was contagious and Simon started celebrating with her. Her parents gave them both an exasperated look knowing that they’d likely opened a can of worms that would never be put back. 

“What should we do first?” Simon asked. Grace smiled and responded.

“I think it’s finally time to break open that game so I can beat you for one millionth time in a row.” she said jokingly. Simon got a look of determination in his eyes.

“We’ll see about that, this time I’m going to win.” he responded as the two ran off to go open the game. Simon’s prediction had been quickly proven false as Grace once again proved that she was indeed the best at everything. After many absolutely grueling games Simon laid exhausted on the floor and Grace spoke to him.

“Are you tired of being beaten yet? Because I have something else I want to do.” she explained. Simon nodded and dragged himself off of the floor to participate in the next activity Grace had planned. The idea Grace had was one she’d wanted to do for a while, so clearing out the living room and gathering countless blankets, pillows, and chairs, Grace and Simon did their best to construct a fort. Most of them weren’t very good but after a bit of adult intervention the two had constructed a magnificent fort. The two sat inside of it, now in pajamas. Lucky for Simon her parents kept pajamas for when her cousins visited or else he’d have been forced to sleep in what he’d been wearing to the party. 

Both had mugs of hot cocoa as they watched Toy Story. That had been Simon’s request after a night of princess movies. Grace didn’t mind at all. She was happy to be here, enjoying a sleepover with her friend on her birthday. She took another sip of the hot cocoa and settled in to go to sleep. Grace had a good birthday.


	6. The Haunted House

“What are you going to be for Halloween?” Simon asked. Grace paused at the question as she hadn’t really put too much thought into the answer. At the moment she was giving Simon a manicure with the kit she’d borrowed from her mother and was pushing back his cuticles as she thought.

“I’m not sure yet, what are you going as?” she asked. Simon shook his head.

“I never dress up for Halloween. I don’t like trick or treating.” he explained. Grace was shocked by how casually he said this. Who didn’t get dressed up and go trick or treating on Halloween? 

“Well that’s not going to work. This year you’re dressing up and coming trick or treating with me. There will even be a haunted house.” she explained. Simon looked unsure as Grace grabbed the clear polish and put it on him.

“I don’t know, I don’t really like scary stuff, I don’t think I could handle a haunted house.” he muttered. Grace looked at him sympathetically. She wasn’t exactly a huge fan of being scared either, but she wanted to have at least one Halloween with a friend. Elisha’s parents were very religious and so she could never go out with her. Being her second best friend in the entire world Grace was determined to make sure that Simon had a good Halloween.

“I’ll protect you from anything too scary. And if something goes wrong I’ll give you some of my candy haul. And that will be a lot as I’m quite the candy magnet.” she said beaming. Simon laughed at this and looked unconvinced.

“I bet I could collect more candy than you.” he responded. Grace raised an eyebrow.

“How about another competition then? If I get more candy then you have to come with me inside of the big haunted house, the scary one. And if you get more candy then...” she waited for Simon’s response.

“You have to sing the official theme song I’ve written for myself on the piano in front of your friends.” he said slyly. Grace couldn’t imagine anything more embarrassing which was probably why he’d made it the deal. Grace weighed her options for a moment considering if she was really willing to put her dignity on the line for a Halloween with her friend. Grace offered her hand in a handshake which Simon took.

“You’ve got a deal.” Grace responded as they shook on it. “Now, we’ve still got to figure out costumes because…” Grace went over to her closet and pulled out a book of photos. Opening it to the page which was labelled Halloween she showed off all of the previous years costumes. “Every single year my parents have me go as a princess and while it was fun at first I’d really like some variety.” she explained. Simon opened his mouth to say something and knowing what it was she stopped him before he could say it. “I’m not going as a ballerina.” he closed his mouth in response.

“Well, I know what I’m going as if I’m dressing up for the first time, Isaiah from the Esmoroth trilogy!” Simon said excitedly. Simon was one of Grace’s best friends and there had been countless instances where she’d had to save him from ultimate embarrassment. Grace decided that this was another one of those times.

“You can’t go as a character from a book that hasn't been written yet.” she explained plainly. Simon looked away embarrassed before looking back at her sadly.

“I just thought that we could be our characters, because it's my first real Halloween and everything.” he said in a voice dripping with pitiable wistfulness. Despite being her age Simon had absolutely mastered the art of the guilt trip at least in this instance. He stared at her with those stupid sad eyes and Grace let out a sigh.

“We can still find a costume to do together.” she responded and the guilt trip face was quickly replaced with one of excitement. And so, Simon’s nails having dried the two searched the internet before deciding on a costume that they would do. Shortly after Simon was picked up by his mother and Grace was excited at the prospect of an exciting Halloween adventure, especially because she was absolutely sure that she was going to beat Simon at their wager. Eventually the night came and the agreement had been made that the two of them would trick or treat in Grace’s neighborhood as it had the haunted house, and the better candy.

On Halloween night Grace suited up in her chosen outfit, black dress shoes, a suit and a black tie which her father had to put on her because she couldn’t figure it out. That along with some dark sunglasses and definitely official and not printed off the internet identification completed her FBI agent costume. It was incredibly different from the costumes of all previous years and while her parents had been surprised when she revealed what she was going as ultimately they thought it was cute. A ring at the door indicated that Simon was there.

The parents exchanged pleasantries while Grace and Simon compared their outfits. Grace tossed Simon the extra identification badge that she’d printed out for him. “If someone asks you who you’re supposed to be just say it’s classified and show them your badge.” she said, explaining. Simon laughed at this and said goodbye to his mother. Grace’s parents looked at the two of them before they could even attempt to leave.

“You two look so cute.” Grace’s mother said. Internally Grace groaned as she knew what was coming next. She turned to Simon in order to give him an advanced warning.

“Prepare for about seven hours worth of pictures.” she said eerily. Her mother rolled her eyes.

“Calm down Grace, we just want to take a few photos.” her father said. Of course Grace was right as she often was about these things as she and Simon stood around for ages getting a million pictures taken of them. 

“Isn’t the point of being a shadowy government organization that we’re in the shadows?” Simon asked. “I feel very not in the shadows right now.” he commented. 

“Oh alright I guess you kids can go.” Grace’s mother said. Grace felt more annoyed than she thought was possible. 

“How come when he complains we get to leave but when I complain we have to take more pictures?” she muttered before running out of the house as fast as she could lest the wrath of her mother come down on her. When they finally made it onto the street before they could approach any houses Grace asked a question. “Do you have a watch?” she asked.

“Yep.” Simon responded. “It’s currently 4:35.” he added.

“We have to be back by seven and the haunted house takes its last guests at 6:30 so we have two hours to collect as much candy as we can.” she responded. Simon nodded and the two began walking along the street looking for houses to collect from. Grace knew it probably wasn’t fair to compete for who could get the most candy. After all, she had years of trick or treat experience whereas this was Simon’s first time. But he’d been the one to challenge her and Grace was not one to back down from a challenge. 

As they approached the first house Grace prepared the Halloween procedure she’d learned from years of work. Pleases and thank you’s and doing her best to look cute. The only thing was, that procedure was written for when Grace was dressed as a princess and tonight she was not. Imagine her shock when at the first house Simon, who leaned into their gimmick received more candy than her. Still, Grace was absolutely not going to lose to Simon.

“I’ve already got more candy than you.” he teased. “I guess maybe there is something that you're not the best at,” he said. Grace had never felt more offended by something that was for the most part a compliment. Grace gave him a look of cocky determination.

“You may have a head start, but it’s not about individual houses, it’s about the whole neighborhood.” she responded. Simon gave her a look of confusion. 

“What does that even mean?” he asked but before he could Grace took off running.

“It means that I'm going to get to the next house before you!” she yelled behind her. Simon took off running as well but Grace made it to the next house first as promised and using the updated playbook that she had stolen from Simon Grace did indeed get more candy than him. The two were tied in terms of candy but Grace had plans to make sure it didn’t stay that way. She would win this because she was Grace Katherine Monroe and she was the best at getting candy. And also she would win this because Grace really wanted to go into the haunted house but was too afraid to do it alone.

The hours ticked on as Grace and Simon went to every house within the vicinity laid out by her parents and collected all of the candy that they could. By the end there was no need for a count as it was clear who the winner had been. Grace resisted the urge to brag knowing that it would be rude attempting to make peace instead. “Don’t feel bad Simon, it was your first Halloween. You still have plenty left to break my record.” despite her attempts to make him feel better Simon still looked upset by something.

“Don’t patronize me Grace.” he said to her.

“I’m sorry okay. I shouldn’t have accepted the challenge.” she responded. Simon shook his head.

“Nah, I should stop making bets I can’t win.” he muttered looking in the direction of the haunted house. It was at that moment that Grace realized it wasn’t disappointment at having lost that Simon was displaying, it was fear. Grace herself was afraid too, but she was also determined. She could make it through that haunted house and she wouldn’t force Simon to come along for the ride.

“You don’t have to go through the haunted house if you don’t want to. I can go through on my own.” she responded. Simon shook his head and looked Grace in the eyes. 

“I lost fair and square so I’m going to do what I said I’d do and go through that haunted house.” The fear was still in his voice but it was now joined by determination. “Besides, I would be an awful friend if I let you go in there alone.” Grace smiled at this, Simon was willing to face his fears, not just to uphold the bet, but also so that she didn’t have to go through the house alone. Through everything Simon really was a great friend.

“Well, if we’re going in there, we should have a last meal.” Grace said, pulling a king sized Snickers bar from her bag. Simon nodded and she opened the wrapper before splitting the thing in two and handing one half to Simon. Both enjoyed their pieces of the chocolate bar and Grace threw away the wrapper before the two looked at the house again. Both put on a brave face as they took each other's hand and walked towards the imposing looking structure which was put up only for Halloween. They stood in line behind groups of teenagers and kids who were slightly older than themselves and felt both out of place and terrified.

“It’s fine, it’s fine.” Simon muttered to himself. Grace nodded at him indicating that they would be okay. As they got closer to the entrance there was a sign that read: “Last Chance To Leave” in blood red lettering. They both shared a moment of consideration in regards to the sign. If they wanted they could still leave now and be protected from whatever horrors lied ahead of them in the haunted house. Taking a deep breath they both pushed passed it finally entering inside the haunted house. Grace immediately regretted every decision which had led her to beside the dark horribly lit shack known as the haunted house. The room they’d entered into was filled with mirrors and Grace continuously whipped around thinking that they were being followed.

As they kept going the mirrors were splattered with red paint made to look like blood, and were shattered. There was a particularly big mirror near the exit into the next room and just as she and Simon approached it out from a dark corner jumped a person in a clown costume and the two ran as fast as they could to the next room. This one had the theming of some sort jail or another and as they walked passed rows of “cells” with mannequins inside to look like different types of monsters. Grace shivered as she was sure she could see one of them move. Just as they heard towards the exit Grace’s suspicion that she had seen one of them move was proven correct as a person in a mask wielding a chainsaw jumped out at them. At this Simon promptly burst into tears.

In that moment something switched in Grace, no longer was she focused solely on her own fear, but the fear of her friend as well. Grace stared down the chainsaw man and without breaking eye contact took off her shoe before beginning to yell. “If anyone in this haunted house jumps out at me or my friend they’re getting a shoe to the head!” she yelled. “No one is allowed to make Simon cry!” she loudly added. Simon clung to her and covered his eyes as Grace led them both through the haunted house. She felt awful considering it was her idea to come in here and it had ended with Simon crying. 

For the most part the rest of the haunted house went smoothly thanks to Grace’s declaration and no one jumped out at them, at least until the final room. As the two made their way through a graveyard scene they weren’t jumped out at by any of the staff. However, some teenagers who were also in the haunted house thought it would be funny to try and scare some kids and so when they passed by a headstone a teenaged boy jumped out at them. Instinct took over for Grace as she reeled back and threw the shoe at him with all of her might. It hit him and then fell to the ground where Grace picked it back up and the two made a mad dash for the exit.

“I’m sorry I dragged you into the haunted house.” Grace said as the two caught their breath outside. Simon looked at her like she was crazy.

“Why are you sorry? That was awesome!” he said. Grace raised an eyebrow at him.

“But you were crying?” she reminded him. Simon nodded.

“I was terrified but it was still awesome, especially because I knew that if anyone tried to attack us you were going to keep us safe with your shoe.” he said. Grace looked away sheepishly.

“Well, no one makes you cry and gets away with it on my watch.” she said. Simon gave her a hug and grabbed his bag of candy.

“Let’s go eat all of this!” he said excitedly. “Race you back to your house!” he said before running ahead. Grace chased after as she did enjoyed the feeling of friendship that they had between him. Simon was a total dork but she liked him and no one was allowed to make him upset. Even though he’d been totally terrified tonight, something told Grace that if it came down to it he’d have done the same for her.


	7. The Attic

Simon loved to read. Reality was boring and sometimes frustrating what with his only friends either being indifferent to him or going to a different school a half an hour away. Or with jerks constantly picking on him because he was quiet or wore strange clothes or sometimes cried when he should have held it in. Simon had been reading for as long as he could remember but on his eleventh birthday he was gifted with something that would change his life. All of the books in the Chronicles of Narnia series, all seven of them now belonged to him.

And so Simon, being the book lover that he was, decided to read them. One cold march afternoon Simon had set out to start reading the books and he’d devoured them all by that weekend because Simon had become obsessed. The fantasy was certainly appealing to any bullied child, discovering a magical fantasy land that was far more interesting than your own and being informed that you were indeed special and destined to save everyone. Simon liked the idea though he didn’t think that he’d have been so easily tricked like Edmund was into falling to the dark side. 

After completing all of those books Simon craved more, he wanted more stories of children who were deemed special and did amazing things. So he did the standards of Harry Potter and Percy Jackson. He also chose some more obscure fare such as the Earthsea trilogy and the Underland Chronicles.Those had both ended up as some of his favorites though he’d hated the Earthsea movies, they added forced romance and changed characters race’s. Simon devoured these books with great interest as if completing them really would make a world in which he was a great hero with a prophecy. That was what Simon really wanted, to be taken away from his mundane and sometimes quite sad life and to be made into something great.

Then again maybe not. It seemed like it would be incredibly frightening to have to constantly save the world and honestly he’d probably miss his mother too much. A lot of these protagonists had missing or dead parents so they never seemed to worry about those types of things but Simon had already been reported missing once this year and he didn’t think he’d like to put his mother through that heartache again. So he decided that maybe he’d only want to be a chosen one if it meant that he was still allowed to come back whenever he wanted and no time would have passed.

That wasn’t the only problem Simon had with some of these books however, he had many. And that was when Simon got an idea. He decided that with all of his prowess at reading these fantasy novels he was already well-versed in enough tropes to write one. And so today he had invited Grace over, partially because he always invited Grace over on weekends and partially because he had a plan. Grace sat on the floor of his living room and Simon had pulled up an old white board from his basement and today he was going to explain how he, Simon Laurent, was going to write the greatest fantasy novel of all time.

Simon started scribbling down his story structure on the white board. “Alright so here is the basic plot, me and you-” he was interrupted by a question from Grace.

“Wait, we’re in this story?” she asked. Simon looked embarrassed.

“Well, not me and you exactly, just characters based on us.” he said sheepishly. Grace looked thoughtful for a moment before giving a response.

“Well, then obviously we have to give them different names. Names that make sure that we know who they are but also make sure that when your book gets super popular and famous other people don’t know who they are.” she said. Simon felt silly at having failed to plan this out properly. He was at the very least glad that he had Grace to come help him with this. He erased what he had written on the white board.

“Alright, new plan! First, we workshop some names, then, back to the actual story.” Grace nodded in agreeance with this and two worked on and chose some names. Grace had her alternate name picked out already as “Elegance” which Simon thought was the most genius thing ever. The two worked a lot harder to find Simon’s alternative name and after borrowing a book of baby names from his mother Simon settled on Isiah. “It also had hebrew roots and biblical implications,” he explained after choosing it.

“I think the main character of a fantasy novel should have a more epic name, but whatever.” Grace had responded. Simon then pointed out that both the Chronicles of Narnia and Harry Potter had main characters with normal names and Grace unable to find a comeback dropped it though she still believed that she was right. After finally picking names Simon once again returned to the white board with the goal of plotting out the story.

“Alright, so Isiah and Elegance are two friends who live normal but boring lives, and even though they’re different they still care about each other.” he explained.

“Just like us.” Grace added jokingly. Simon smiled at the comment.

“Yeah, just like us. Anyway one day when the two are hanging out they stumble across a magical other world-” Grace cut him off again

“How exactly did they stumble across this other world?” she asked. Simon felt embarrassed.

“I haven’t written that part yet.” He mumbled before continuing. “After coming across the magical world Isiah and Elegance find out that there’s a prophecy about them that they have to save the world. Elegance finds out that she’s a princess-” Simon was cut off once again.

“Her being a princess raises a lot of questions. How does succession work in this universe? Is the throne a familial office? Is male primogeniture a thing?” she asked. Simon stood and looked dumbfounded before erasing the bored again.

“Okay, another new plan, let's figure out how the system of government works in this magical world.” he said. The two sat down trying to decipher the backstory of this universe and decided that the crown was a familial office that went to the eldest daughter, and that her family had ruled for decades, but when none of the former princesses could fulfil the prophecy they had their memories erased and were sent back to the real world. The title of queen was achieved not through marriage or death but through completing the tasks laid out by the prophecy and so there had never been a queen. After Grace was satisfied with the lore of her character Simon was relieved that he could finally return to the white board. 

“Okay, now that we’ve got that settled, the prophecy states that two kids will arrive, one the princess, and the other the descendant of an ancient hero, and together they will be the ones to defeat the great evil that is ruining the land.” Simon explained adding it to the white board. Grace raised her hand to ask another question and Simon died inside a little as he knew she was going to point out something he hadn’t written yet.

“So, how do they know that Isiah is the descendant of the ancient hero? Do they have tests?” she asked. Simon lit up as this was a question he could actually answer.

“They don’t know it’s him at first and all of the council, I'll get to them later, think that he should be sent back and that they should keep looking. But Elegance vouches for him and he completes three trials to prove he’s related to the hero.” he explained writing it down as he spoke. Grace nodded along and asked another question.

“So, how are they going to defeat this undefined great evil? Do they have powers?” she asked. Simon tried to think of an answer settling on meeting halfway.

“Kind of, they get these cool artifacts and they made them powerful enough to defeat the bad guy.” he added this to the white board as well. Grace nodded and Simon looked at her for a reaction. “What do you think.” he looked over at the white board which was filled with writings of the story and what would take place across the narrative.

“I think that your handwriting is awful and I can’t read any of your notes.” she explained. Simon sighed and Grace, likely feeling pity, through him a bone. “I think the story is going to be great, because you're going to write it and you're great.” she added. Simon lit up at this.

“Thanks Grace.” he responded. Shortly after his mother walked in, wondering about what the children were up to in the living room and why it involved a white board and a baby name book.

“What are you two doing?” she asked casually. Simon explained.

“Grace is helping me workshop my fantasy novel.” he responded. His mother nodded and turned to Grace.

“Honey, if he’s holding you against your will blink twice.” she said in a mock serious voice. Both she and Grace began laughing and Simon felt his ears become hot with embarrassment.

“That’s not funny mom,” he said annoyed. His mother walked over and ruffled his hair.

“I’m just kidding.” she said sweetly and Simon felt both more and less embarrassed. “Do you kids want some cake?” she asked and Grace dashed off into the kitchen, the entire conversation forgotten about with the prospect of sweets. Simon too completely lost any sense of embarrassment when the option of cake was introduced which was likely why his mom had said it. Both received slices and enjoyed the pieces of cake which they had been served making casual conversation about the story.

“Have you decided on a name yet?” Grace asked. Simon nodded with enthusiasm.

“The Esmoroth trilogy.” he said as if it was the great epic of a generation. Grace let out a giggle that Simon ignored to protect his feelings.

“What does Esmoroth mean? Also, how is it a trilogy if we haven’t finished the outline of the first book?” Simon shrugged. 

“I just think Esmoroth sounded like a cool name, maybe it can be the name of the magical land they visit. And also trilogies are always awesome, so this series will be a trilogy.” he responded. Grace nodded and asked something else as she continued to eat the cake.

“Do you have a grand finale planned for the ending? There’s nothing more annoying than when a story doesn’t end well after a lot of build up.” she said. Simon thought for a moment before snapping. He put his plate in the sink and ran back over to the white board to add something. Grace followed after, curious on what Simon would add.

“Think about it Grace, a huge battle with the great evil that lasts until the sun rises and as the sun comes up our heroes stand victorious, having saved the world. Elegance is crowned the first queen of Esmoroth, Isaiah is given the sword of his ancestor, and then the two of them go home.” he said adding the notes to the board despite the knowledge that Grace couldn’t read them. “What do you think of that ending?” he asked nervously. Grace looked at him and Simon hoped that she didn’t think that the idea was stupid. Grace smiled and walked over towards him.

“I think that it’s got a lot of potential and if anyone can write it, it's you.” she responded. That was exciting, even if Simon kind of hoped that she’d have said it was the greatest fantasy novel of all time instead of saying that it had potential. Grace thought it had potential and so Simon would do his best to unlock the potential that it had. He’d write a theme song for a potential show on the piano, he would draw up concept art for the characters and use himself and Grace as models for the main characters. Simon thought about something and made a heat of the moment decision.

“I want to show you something, come with me.” he said, grabbing Grace’s hand. The two crept up the stairs quietly. He’d never shown Grace the upstairs of his house, and she’d never asked. Even if she had he wouldn’t have taken her to see what he was about to but he trusted her, Grace was his friend and if he was going to show this stuff to anyone it would be her. 

“Where are we going?” Grace whispered. Simon pulled down the string that hung from the ceiling which let out the attic stairs.

“I have to find something.” Simon replied. He’d show her when he found it. Simon climbed up the stairs and to his surprise Grace followed. The attic was dusty and gross and he wasn’t supposed to be up here alone, much less up here with a friend. Still, Simon had a goal so he began looking through boxes. “Tell me if you find a box labeled Concept.” he said as he rustled through the old dusty cardboard boxes of Christmas decorations and clothes that his mother insisted she was going to donate if she could just remember. Grace looked as well and after a short time she picked up a relatively small box but heavy box and handed it to him.

“Is this it?” she asked him. Simon looked at the handwriting on the side of the box.

“Yeah, this is it.” he responded before sitting down on the attic floor and opening it. Grace still looked confused but sat down beside him anyway. As he opened it Simon was greeted by exactly what he’d hoped. Pages of typed documents, drawings, and what he’d hoped for, carved wooden figures of characters. He handed one to Grace to look at.

“What is all this stuff?” Grace asked. Simon began with his explanation.

“When I was little my dad used to make up stories for me to help me sleep, and eventually he started writing them down. It was something that we did together, I’d come up with characters and stories and scenes and he’d write them down, or draw them, or carve them.” he said gesturing to the little wooden figures one of which Grace was still holding. “This is what I want to do for Esmoroth, I want to have tons of stuff written out for the story but I also want to make models and art for it.” he said passionately. Grace looked at him and he thought she was going to ask him something.

He figured that she’d probably ask him about his dad or about why all of this stuff was in the attic or about why he wanted her to see this stuff. Grace didn’t ask any of that and Simon was thankful. He didn’t even know why he’d shown all of this stuff to Grace, it had just felt right to tell her his plans for the story.

“I can’t wait to see it.” Grace said and it had been so genuine that Simon almost wanted to hug her and thank her for being an awesome best friend but he figured it would have been embarrassing so he didn’t. Instead the two descended the stairs in silence and Simon put the attic stairs back and the two spent the rest of the afternoon workshopping the story and Simon felt a combination of determination, excitement, and friendship.


	8. The Beach House

Simon loved the summers. In the summer he didn’t have to go to school which meant he didn’t have to be around the people who were rude to him. Sometimes he hung out with Tyler and Jacob but those two weren’t the highlight of his summers, books were. Unending days of sitting around consuming every bound reading material in the house and in the local library was by far the most exciting part of the summer. And this summer was set to be even better with him having Esmoroth to work on and having Grace to hang out with meant that this would surely be the best summer ever. 

The home phone rang and Simon picked it up recognizing the number. He remembered when she’d first come over Grace was shocked that they even had a home phone but it had quickly become useful as it meant that even on days where the two couldn’t hang out they could still talk, a godsend for two children without phones of their own. Simon spoke into the receiver not even bothering to confirm who it was launching right into conversation.

“What’s going on?” he asked as he took the phone with him and sat on the couch to settle in for what was sure to be a long conversation. Just as he’d known it was indeed Grace who began talking right away.

“I’m bored.” she complained, something which made Simon laugh.

“You have the most stuff of anyone I’ve ever met.” he responded jokingly. She groaned in response.

“I have no one to talk to and it’s driving me crazy.” she responded, still sounding bored. “I just want to leave for vacation already.” she added. Simon felt his heart drop into his stomach as he realized that he’d never actually asked Grace what her plans for the summer were.

“You’re going on vacation?” he asked nervously. Grace hummed in response before elaborating.

“My family goes on vacation every year over the summer.” she said and Simon felt even worse. He’d never been on a family vacation and Grace went every year. He was stupid for thinking that Grace’s life would be as boring as his in terms of summer. Why had he assumed that she’d want to spend her summer hanging out even if she wasn’t leaving? Simon shook those thoughts from his head, Grace liked hanging out with him because they were friends and she would hang out with him when she got back from vacation. 

“How long are you going to be gone for?” he asked, hoping that it would be a short excursion. Grace’s answer made his heart drop again.

“The rest of June.” she responded. Simon looked over at the calendar, June third. That was twenty seven whole days without being able to talk to or hang out with his best and practically only friend. How would he even survive? 

“Oh.” was all that Simon could manage to say. “When do you leave?” he asked, hoping that he might have even a little time before he’d have to say goodbye to Grace for the entire month.

“We’re supposed to leave tomorrow but something happened and now my parents are really stressed so I don’t know.” he explained. Simon had a thought which he realized was very selfish but he still hoped for anyway. Silently Simon wished that whatever had happened would cause Grace to not go on vacation and they could just hang out for the rest of the summer. Simon mentally scolded himself for wishing misfortune on Grace’s vacation just because he didn’t want to be without her for a short time.

“Do you know what’s happening?” he asked hoping that the event wasn’t anything awful that he’d just mentally encouraged in a moment of weakness. Grace sighed over the phone wistfully.

“Well, every year we go on vacation with Elisha and her family,” she began. Simon silently felt bitter. He had no reason to dislike Elisha, she seemed like a nice normal person. It was just that he knew Grace liked her more than she liked him. She was Grace’s best friend and he was her second best friend and when you're a child those types of things are very important. The distinction between “good friend” and “best friend” was night and day. And if you were Simon who already had two friends who liked each other more than they liked him there was nothing more painful than knowing that someone was your best friend but you weren’t there’s. All of his stewing made Simon realize Grace had been talking and he hadn’t heard any of it.

“I’m sorry, can you repeat what you said?” he responded and Grace did.

“I said, this year is her family reunion so they can’t come and we’ve got extra tickets.” She repeated. Simon let out a silent sigh of relief that nothing bad had happened to cause the sudden change of plans and then got an amazing idea which he blurted out before he could stop himself.

“Me and my mom should go with you on vacation!” He shouted before he could stop himself. He felt so stupid as the words left his mouth. He felt like he was forcing himself on Grace when it was obvious that she had plans and a life outside of him and didn’t want to be around him all of the time. The line was silent for a while after that with the two of them sitting there. Simon thought that Grace was likely thinking of ways to tell him that she didn’t want to be friends anymore. Finally she spoke.

“Simon, that is...the greatest idea ever!” She practically squealed into the phone. “I’ve got to tell my parents it’s going to be so awesome!” She said. Simon could hear footsteps rushing off as the phone was dropped and Grace went to go find her parents. Simon felt his heart pound in his ears at the idea of spending an entire vacation with Grace. He didn’t even know what people were supposed to do on vacation but he knew it would be much more fun than sitting around missing her for the entire vacation. If her parents actually agreed to this and his mother actually agreed to this Simon might have pulled off the most amazing scheme in all of childhood history. After all, there was no way to go on a whole vacation with someone and not come out the other side best friends. Grace rushed back and updated Simon on what was occurring.

“My mom said that it was a good idea, and my dad said he’d call your mom!”she said excitedly. “If this actually happens it would be so awesome!” She said. Sure enough in the other room he could hear his mother picking up a phone call. Simon couldn’t believe that this was actually possibly happening. He and Grace talked a little while longer before his mother told him to get off of the phone and he did as he was told. 

“Simon, the Monroe’s have graciously invited us to join them on vacation. We’d be going out of the state and I know that you’ve never been that far or on a plane but, would you want to do that?” She asked. Simon nodded vigorously, after all, she’d just asked him if he wanted to go on his first vacation alongside his best friend in the entire world for a month. His mother smiled.

“Okay, I’ll tell them. We’ll probably leave in a week or so, so get ready.” She told him. Simon saluted her as if she was a general giving an order, something which made his mother laugh and ruffle his hair. He ran off trying to figure out what to pack before realizing that he didn’t even know where they were going. He ran back down to ask his mother.

“Mom, how do I pack if I don’t know where we’re going?” He asked her. His mother looked up from her book to address him.

“We’re going to Florida.” She said. Simon stared at her slack jawed and opened his mouth to say something before being corrected. “We’re not going to Disneyworld.” She said and Simon closed his mouth, his comment having been rejected before he could even attempt to make it. He went back to packing and hoped that the Florida weather meant that he’d actually be allowed to wear sockless sandals around the place rather than being forced to wear his mother’s favorite practical footwear around the state of Florida.

The next week was absolute torture for Simon. Him and Grace talked everyday about how awesome going on vacation together would be and how much fun it would be to hang out together and how they’d take tons of pictures. Simon of course still didn’t know exactly where they were going in Florida other than “Not Disneyworld” but he was excited nonetheless. He was sure that hanging out with Grace could make even the most boring situations fun.

The day that his mother had woken him up early in the morning to go to the airport he hadn’t even been asleep when she entered his room. He’d been far too excited and nervous. Archduke Franz Ferdinand had been dropped off at his grandmother's house and while he felt bad that the dog wouldn’t be joining them he promised him that he’d bring him back treats. Archduke Franz Ferdinand, being a dog, didn’t understand and kept trying to lick him. After that they were off to the airport. Upon arrival they met up with the Monroe’s and he was shocked by Grace’s appearance.

“Wow, you look tired.” He said and it was true. He’d seen Grace tired before she went to sleep before and this was nothing like that. She struggled to keep her eyes open as she propped herself up on her suitcase. She did the best approximation of an eye roll that she could manage before responding.

“I slept two hours last night before these two,” she glared at her parents who smiled back at her. “Woke me up.” she said. Simon nodded as Grace let out a yawn. “Oh well, at least I’ll get to sleep on the flight. And the roller coasters will wake me up.” She added happily. Simon was surprised by this. He saw the Monroe’s as more of a beach house family than a theme park family. In addition he’d never been on a roller coaster and was just slightly terrified of the idea. He could already feel his stomach getting sick just thinking about it. Apparently that showed on his face as Grace made a comment. “You don’t look amazing yourself by the way.”

“I’ve never been on a roller coaster before.” He said. Grace looked sympathetic and then excited. 

“Oh I’m forcing you to ride everything in the park.” She replied slyly. Simon shook his head.

“That’s fine, my clothes are normal and yours are expensive so when I vomit I’ll aim for you.” He replied jokingly. Grace feigned indignation.

“You’re so gross.” She replied though she was still smiling. After a long and arduous trip through boarding which Simon thought was the most awful experience of his life and sitting while waiting for their numbers to be called which Simon thought was the most boring experience of his life they were able to get on the plane. Grace offered him some gum before they took off, which she’d said was to pop his ears. Simon had no idea what that meant but he was in no rush to find out and took the gum eagerly. 

Grace told him later on the flight that riding through the air fills your ears with liquid and it would make them hurt unless you popped them. The idea made his stomach hurt. Simon thought that being on a plane would have made him more nervous but in actuality he was so enamored with the sight of the clouds and the feeling of being in the air that he barely even noticed. It was amazing and Simon felt like the trip was worth it for that experience alone. 

By the time they’d landed they still had to get back through the new airport, and collect their baggage, and take a car ride down to where they’d be staying. Simon was both surprised and not surprised to see that the Monroe’s did in fact have a beach house.

“I thought we were going to a theme park.” Simon said. Grace explained.

“We never go on the first day, the first day is for unwinding and picking rooms.” And with that Grace dashed off to call dibs on a bedroom and Simon ran right after her to also pick a room.

“No running,” Simon’s mother had started to say before being waved off by Grace’s mother.

“Don’t bother, they never listen anyway.” She replied and Simon’s mother laughed and nodded. Grace and Simon found a room with bunk beds and both begged their parents to let them share it. 

“If we let you two share a room you have to promise to go to sleep and not stay up all night.” Mr Monroe said seriously. Grace nodded at this and made a promise.

“I swear we’ll be quiet and asleep.” She said as Simon stood nearby giving his best sad face to his own mother. Grace’s father let out a sigh.

“Fine.” He said. Both Grace and Simon jumped up and down excitedly with Simon calling dibs on the top bunk. The two spent the day exploring the house and digging up the board games that had been left there. That and raiding the fridge anytime either of them suggested that they might be hungry. For the most part their parents left them to their own devices, the adults much preferring to sleep, silently read, or sit in the sun on the deck. This was fine with both of them as the chaos they caused was much more fun when they were left alone. However eventually by the end of the day they’d been forced to retire to their rooms.

The two sat now playing war against each other with cards they’d found in the drawer. It reminded Simon of a memory that made him a bit sad. Grace had proven that she could be trusted with him displaying emotions and not mocking him for it so he took a risk and said aloud what he was thinking.

“I wish my dad was here,” he said quietly. Grace halted before putting down her card likely caught off guard by the mention. It made sense, Simon did his best not to bring up his father, it made him too sad. Grace spoke to him now.

“Is your dad-” Simon knew what she was going to say and cut her off.

“He’s not dead.” Simon said that seriously. He hated that question because it reminded him that the answer could change, that the answer might have already changed and Simon wouldn’t know for weeks. “He’s fighting in the war.” Grace looked shocked at this comment.

“Wait, we’re at war? For how long? And with who?” she asked. Simon did his best to answer her questions.

“We’ve been at war for a long time but I don’t know with who.” he responded. Grace’s expression softened. 

“Do you miss your dad a lot?” she asked. Simon nodded.

“I miss him all the time. I wish he hadn’t left. Does that make me selfish?” he asked. Grace adamantly shook her head.

“You’re not selfish for not wanting your dad to leave.” she responded. Simon smiled at the reassurance and then frowned remembering that he was still selfish because he’d been happy Elisha couldn’t come.

“I’m selfish for being glad that your best friend couldn’t come because I wanted to spend time with you.” he muttered. Grace looked at him confused for a moment and then shook her head.

“Can I tell you a secret Simon? When Elisha told me I was a little happy too because I didn’t want to spend a whole month without my best friend.” Simon felt absolutely shocked by this revelation.

“I’m your best friend?” Grace nodded at this. Simon had absolutely no idea how or why he was lucky enough to have a friend like Grace but he didn’t want to question it in case this was all a dream. “You're my best friend too.”


	9. The Outing

There is absolutely nothing in the world more boring to anyone, child or adult, than the stretch of time known as mid-January. At least this was what one Grace Katherine Monroe believed to be true. It wasn’t a thought that was unfounded. All of the fun holidays had passed and months away were the ones worth caring about. The sun was a distant memory of brighter times and at least for Grace school wise she was running on empty, only being kept alive by the distant promise of spring break. 

So here Grace sat on the couch bored out of her mind on this gloomy January day absolutely praying for anything to do. Evidently her prayers had been answered as shortly after the phone rang and was greeted by a call from none other than Simon. She answered it quickly wanting to be rescued from boredom. At this point she’d even settle for one of his long winding rants about the Esormoth trilogy over listening to the sounds of silence that filled her house.

“Hey Grace, It’s not like a big deal or anything but my mom found a coupon for one of those trampoline places and said I could invite some friends so if you want you can come.” he said casually. Grace clocked that as strange, usually when Simon had something to invite her to he was very excited about it. Still, Grace wasn’t concerned enough about it to risk losing out on an escape from her boredom so she didn’t mention the strangeness of it.

“I’ll ask my parents.” she said. Grace rushed off and did just that. She got the okay and told Simon. “What’s the address of the place?” she asked. “Peirce is going to bring me up there.” she explained. Simon quickly added something.

“You don’t have to go straight there, just have him drop you off at my house since you already know the address and we’ll all go together.” he said. Grace still noticed something in his voice, tension, nervousness? She couldn't decide. Grace figured that if something really was wrong she’d find out when the two met up and put the rest out of mind. Her and Simon exchanged goodbyes and Peirce took her to the Laurent household. Pulling onto that familiar curb she was once again struck by a difference. Normally Simon was either sitting on the stoop or waiting for her searching for her car at the window but he wasn’t either of those places. Well, he was at the window but he was pacing back and forth, he didn’t even notice when she arrived. 

Grace left the car, gave Pierce his thank you and walked up ringing the doorbell. Grace heard shuffling inside and correctly assumed that she’d broken Simon from his pacing and he was rushing for the door. This was confirmed when he opened the door for her. Appearance wise Simon looked fine so Grace considered that to be good. 

“Hey Simon, I’m excited for the trampolines.” she said. Simon nodded.

“Right, come inside.” he responded and she did. She heard Mrs. Laurent call out from the kitchen.

“Who’s at the door?” she said.

“It’s just Grace.” he responded and Grace was a little annoyed by the term. She figured that she shouldn’t be considering that they were best friends and had been for a long time so being “Just Grace” was likely more of a mark of a long lasting friendship than anything. It didn’t stop her from feeling a bit upset about it. Grace decided to ask Simon what was wrong because he was bad at hiding these things and the quicker she figured it out the quicker things could go back to being normal.

“Are you okay Simon? You seem kind of upset about something.” she asked. She saw a wave of surprise and then relief wash over Simon and he sat down to explain everything to her.

“I’m just nervous because this is the first time that you’re going to meet my other friends and I really want you all to get along.” he said nervously. Grace raised an eyebrow at this.

“That’s why you’ve been acting so weird? It’s okay if some of your friends aren’t friends. You’re not close with my friends.” she responded. Simon shook his head.

“That’s different. You’ve got tons of friends and I’ve only got a few. So if you all don’t get along then I’ll end up with even fewer friends than I already have.” the anxiety in his voice was clear and it was likely Simon had spent far too much time stressing over the outcome of this single day. Grace gave him a confident pat on the back to try and reassure her worrying friend. 

“Listen, if me getting along with your other friends is important to you, it’s important to me. So I promise you that I, Grace Kathrine Monroe, will be the best, most welcoming, most exciting person ever so that all of your friends will like me.” she responded. Simon looked at her thankful. 

“Thanks Grace, you’re the best,” he told her. Grace gave a smug smile in return.

“I know.” she responded jokingly. Simon quickly shot back.

“And so humble too.” he added teasingly. Grace hit him with a throw pillow and the two would have began an all out pillow fight had it not been for the interruption of Mrs. Laurent.

“Alright, we’ll be going at two so you’re actually early Grace.” she began. “And Simon, don’t play with my good throw pillows.” she said in a mostly jokinging scolding tone. She turned to Grace. “It’s up to you to be a good influence on him.” she said. Simon raised an objection to this.

“She’s the one who started this!” he said playfully indignant. Grace shook her head and turned to Simon’s mother.

“I’ll do my best Mrs. Laurent.” Grace said. Simon’s mother chuckled at Grace’s comment and use of a formal name.

“Please sweetie, you can just call me Margaret.” she responded. Grace shook her head.

“Thank you for the offer but physically I don’t think that I can do that.” Grace said seriously. Mrs. Laurent laughed at this again and walked off. Grace and Simon still having some time went to go look at the updated star chart that Simon had made. Grace found Simon’s enthusiasm about the thing very endearing and it brought her back to the day that she and Simon had met. That had been a year ago, maybe almost two. In a lot of ways they had changed very little from that day besides getting a bit taller and in other ways they had changed a lot. Grace could barely remember not always being able to call Simon and talk to him even though Simon was a fairly new development in her life. Sometimes she felt like she and Simon had known each other forever.

Eventually the time did come for Grace and the Laurents to pile into the car and drive to the location where they would hang out. As they did Grace remembered what she’d decided to do, she’d have to be the most interesting, exciting, and non-threatening person of all time if she wanted to get the approval of Simon’s friends and therefore keep Simon’s other friendships intact. If his friends were anything like him it shouldn’t be too difficult. After all, how difficult could it be to get along with his friends. 

Upon arriving Grace got her first look at these friends of Simon and they looked about how she’d expected, black and brown hair with non-distinct features. They didn’t stick out much and if what Simon had told her about the way they were treated at school was true that was probably something they were fine with.

“Hi, I’m Grace.” she said to the two, waiting for their reaction. Neither acknowledged her and both walked over to where Simon was standing to talk to him instead. Grace got an uneasy feeling in her stomach which she ignored. They were likely just unsure of her, was what she told herself as she walked over to where the three congregated. Simon formally introduced her to the two now.

“Guys, this is Grace. I told you about her before.” he said. Both of them looked at her again, this time as if they thought she was somehow lying to them without having said anything. At the very least they did share their names now.

“Tyler.” the one with brown hair said.

“Jacob.” was the name of the one with black hair. That uneasy feeling was back in her stomach. Grace was a nice person so people liked her. She was not used to people not liking her and she was even less used to people not liking her for no reason. Grace didn’t like to keep uncomfortable feelings to herself but they hadn’t technically done anything wrong and she didn’t want to be the one to ruin the day before it started. So she took that uneasy feeling and ignored it. The three headed off towards the trampolines and Grace did her best to have fun. And sometimes she was having fun. 

Sometimes her and Simon would challenge each other to try and reach something super high up and she’d do it leaving everyone speechless. Sometimes Simon would remind her of a funny shared memory and they’d laugh and it would be fun. But Simon wasn’t always around her. And then Grace would interact with Tyler and Jacob and she wouldn’t be having fun anymore. She didn’t know why the two of them gave her that nervous feeling in her stomach but they did. Sometimes they’d ignore her like she didn’t exist and that wasn’t fun at all. But sometimes they’d turn and look at her and ask why she was watching them, or standing near them, or bothering them. And that made Grace want to walk far away and go home.

It wasn’t just that what they said was rude, it was definitely rude but that wasn’t what made Grace the most uncomfortable. It was the way that they’d say it to her. It made her feel like her being there was something wrong in of itself. It made Grace feel like she wasn’t allowed to be there even though she’d been invited and Simon was her friend. And Grace really wanted to say something to Simon about it but everytime she almost did she’d stop herself. Grace had promised Simon that she’d get along with his friends and she didn’t want to ruin the fun that they were having because she was too sensitive.

That was all it was, her being sensitive. She tried to tell herself that but it wouldn’t work. Grace knew that they were being mean to her on purpose, she knew it wasn’t her being overdramatic. Simon’s mom called him over and he walked off towards her leaving Grace alone with his friends. One of them started to say something to her that Grace knew would be rude.

“Why are you still here-” Grace cut him off.

“Why are you being mean to me? I haven't done anything to you!” she said more distressed then she meant to. Grace couldn’t help it, this was distressing. To have people you’ve never met before treating you like you’ve slighted them somehow. The one who Grace was pretty sure was named Tyler was the one who gave her the answer.

“We don’t like you because we just don’t. We don’t want you around, why don’t you get that?” he said so seriously that Grace was sure he’d said it before. Grace wasn’t a person who cried, her parents didn’t cry and neither did she. Grace wasn’t going to cry because two people she didn’t know didn’t like her. So she walked away. Grace found a nice bench to sit on and waited for Simon to return to his friends so she could ask his mom to call her ride. Grace wouldn’t ruin their fun but she wasn’t going to stick around to be the butt of anyone’s jokes. At this point, Grace just wanted to go home. She sat there for a while before hearing approaching footsteps and turning to see Simon.

“There you are, I was looking for you.” Grace nodded and didn’t say anything. Simon looked concerned. “What’s wrong?” he asked. Grace did her best to not give away what had happened.

“I want to go home.” she said quietly. Simon looked even more concerned upon hearing that.

“What happened? Is something wrong? Did I do something wrong?” he asked. Grace quickly shook her head.

“No, nothing’s wrong I just want to go home.” she said, doing her best to make her words sound authentic. Simon gave her a disbelieving look.

“Grace, you're the best at almost everything. Except lying.” Grace looked away from him upon hearing that. She kept doing her best to keep herself together. “Grace, you can tell me if somethings wrong. I’ll always be on your side.” Grace started to shake her head but couldn’t hold back any longer and blurted out what she wanted to say.

“Your friends are jerks Simon. They’ve been bullying me all day.” Grace didn’t know what she expected to happen at that moment. Maybe she thought he’d want to hear their side of the story, or deny that it had happened. That was not what Simon did.

“Okay, I’ll send them home.” he said casually. “And I won’t be friends with them anymore.” he added. Grace was surprised at this and shook her head.

“I can’t make you stop being friends with them because they don’t like me.” she said.

“Not liking someone is one thing but bullying them is different and I don’t want to be friends with anyone who’d bully you.” he said earnestly. Grace still looked unsure.

“Those are your friends.” she muttered.

“I can make other friends. And besides, you’re my best friend. You’re the one who’s seen me throw up on a roller coaster and heard me talk about my dad and seen me cry at the planetarium.” he said listing instances of their closeness. Grace smiled remembering all of those things. She and Simon were best friends, of course he’d have her back. She’d been silly to think that he wouldn’t. 

“Thank you Simon.” she said, giving him a hug. Simon hugged her back.

“It’s what best friends are for.”


	10. The Kitchen

Grace was older than Simon by one month exactly and she never let him forget it. March 28th was when Simon had been born and because it had been then and not one month before he had to endure countless teasing about his age from his best friend; which he didn’t mind, but put up token resistance to anyway.

“You know, because I’m older than you, I’ll get to drive first and see Pg-13 movies first.” Grace said over the phone. Simon rolled his eyes even though she couldn’t see it happening.

“You’ll also die first.” he shot back. Simon honestly thought he’d sounded too mean and was going to apologize when Grace began laughing on the other line, a reaction he was not expecting.

“Actually, since I’m a girl statistically you'll still die first.” she responded. Simon groaned at this answer.

“Did you really call me just to remind me that I’m going to die someday?” he asked. Grace was quick with her answer.

“No, I called to ask what you're doing for your birthday.” she said. “And to remind you that I can call whenever I want now that I have a cell phone.” Grace’s birthday had been four and a half weeks ago and like everything about Grace it had been extravagant and awesome. It had also ended with her being gifted a cell phone which was something Simon was undecided on the goodness of. In all honesty Simon would have liked a cell phone for his birthday but he had absolutely no hopes of getting one until college, or until he had his own job. That was according to his mom. Simon knew that if his dad was there he might have a chance of getting one before he was old but who knew when he’d be back.

“Why do I have a feeling that giving you a phone was an awful decision?” he questioned. Grace chuckled at his statement even though Simon was completely serious.

“Probably because it was. Now, what are you doing for your birthday?”she asked again. Simon wasn’t jealous of Grace’s life. It was awesome no doubt but Simon was never one for extravagance or expensive gifts and all that. If he had a chance to live his life or Grace’s he’d probably choose his own. But that knowledge didn’t make Simon any less self-conscious of how different their lives were and how much more interesting Grace’s was. That was probably why he’d neglected to tell Grace about his birthday plans.

“The same thing I did last year.” he said quietly.

“Cake and ice cream at your house?” she asked to clarify.

“Yeah.” Simon responded, still quiet. It was what he did for his birthday every year. Grace had two big bombastic themed parties over the course of him knowing her and he got the feeling that she did something new for her birthday every year. Simon was not like that. He had his cake and ice cream with his mom and maybe a friend or two and that was his birthday. He liked it that way and he’d never been embarrassed about it until he’d met Grace. That wasn’t fair, Grace wasn’t trying to make him feel inadequate after all. It was just that she was so cool he wanted to live up to that standard. Simon had been so lost in his own self-pitying internal monologue he hadn’t even heard Grace’s response.

“Sounds fun!” she said. Simon always forgot how awesome Grace was and he figured that he should work harder on remembering that. She never judged him for not being as outgoing or extravagant or cool as she was. The only one who did that was his own brain and if he could stop he’d probably be a lot happier.

“Hey Grace?” Simon said.

“Yeah?” she responded.

“You’re a good friend,” he concluded. He didn’t know why he’d said it but he was happy that he had.

“So are you.” Grace said in response. The two of them understood each other in a way that wasn’t clear to either of them. They both made each other happier people for the most part and that made them good friends. Simon couldn’t imagine being best friends with anyone else. The two talked for a while longer before Simon’s mother made him get off the phone while Grace bragged about being able to talk for as long as she wanted. Simon went about his day mostly like any other after that point.

He still had three days until his birthday and Simon didn’t have plans to invite anyone, other than Grace. After the event with his former friends Simon didn’t really talk to anyone at school. He was kind of okay with that as sad as it seemed. Simon of course would have liked some friends but there were benefits to having none. He spent his lunch in the library studying now instead of sitting at the table being left out by his friends. Doing that made Simon realize that he liked learning about stuff.

He’d always been considered smart but Simon now had a hunger for knowledge. Before when he felt bad Simon would imagine that one day he’d be popular and famous and everyone would like him. Now when he felt bad he imagined that one day he’d be really smart and do something incredible because of it. Simon knew that spending his lunch in the library reading books about history and science and math probably made him and even bigger target for bullying but the great thing about being invisible was that no one even cared enough about you to bother you and if there was one thing that Simon could claim it was that no one at that school cared about him, so they left him alone.

Still, Simon knew that his possible research output was limited by the fact that his school was still overcrowded and underfunded. If he went to a better school Simon figured he’d already be a genius by now. It wasn’t like he had anything keeping him tied to this school either, so if someone had come up to him and offered to send him to another school far away and never see any of his peers again it’s a deal he would have taken. Of course Simon knew that fantasy wouldn’t come true, changing schools would be expensive and he’d never put that kind of burden on his mother.

To saisate his quest for knowledge rather than beg her to change schools Simon asked his mother for an encyclopedia for his birthday. The look she’d given him when he’d asked made him feel like he’d done something wrong but after confirming that it was what he wanted she’d agreed. So Simon waited for his birthday where he could eat cake and ice cream and talk to his best and currently only friend and then after she’d left he could sit down and read his encyclopedia. Simon decided that that was a thing to look forward to. What felt to Simon like a painfully long three days his birthday did finally arrive.

He knew it was his birthday because when he’d woken up Archduke Franz Ferdinand was asleep at the foot of his bed and his mother had a very big “No dog on the furniture” rule which was only allowed to be broken on special occasions. His birthday was one of those occasions. When he’d woken up Archduke Franz Ferdinand had immediately begun licking his face. Simon laughed at this before removinging the dog from his bed and going to the kitchen in order to retrieve breakfast. The kitchen smelled like pancakes and eggs and Simon smiled because his mother always made pancakes and eggs on his birthday.

He walked into the kitchen and upon seeing him his mother threw him into a hug despite the fact that they lived together and hadn’t been separated. “How’s my little birthday boy?” she asked, ruffling his hair. Simon sighed and gave a response.

“Don’t call me that, it’s embarrassing.” he said, utterly annoyed with the name his mother had just given him.

“Why not? The two of us are the only ones here and embarrassing you is my job.” his mother responded. Simon put his head in his hands. He didn’t know how to explain that embarrassing things were still embarrassing even when it was just the two of them. Rather than attempt to, he sat down to eat breakfast in silence. Simon let his mind wander to his birthday three years ago when he’d turned nine. That had been the last birthday his father had been around for. When he’d turned ten his father had been able to call them. When he’d turned eleven Simon had gotten a letter.

“Did anything come for me?” Simon asked suddenly. His mother looked at him surprised before shaking her head.

“No, were you expecting something?” she asked humorously. Simon kept eating his pancakes.

“No, I wasn’t expecting anything.” That was of course a lie. Simon was expecting something from his father, an acknowledgement that he was okay. But there was none. Simon was a little terrified that the lack of acknowledgement meant that his father wasn’t okay, that something had happened to him and his mother was too afraid to say it. The other part of him thought that maybe his father had just forgotten due to being so busy fighting in a war for so long. He wasn’t sure which he thought was worse.

He wouldn’t say any of this to his mother of course, it would just worry her, and make her feel bad. Simon knew that she missed his father too but did her best to keep it hidden and to be a good mom. Even if she was one of the most embarrassing people on planet earth he still loved her and thought she did as good a job as she could. So he wouldn’t make the day sad by bringing up things that would make her sad. Birthdays were supposed to be happy. He should be happy today because he was going to eat cake and ice cream with his friend and open his gift.

“Simon are you okay?” his mother asked, concerned. He looked up from his pancakes which he realized he’d been staring intensely at. Simon wiped his cheeks and found that they were wet, he’d been crying without even realizing it. Simon looked at that worried face of his mother and told himself to lie, to say that nothing was wrong and that he was fine. He told himself not to worry her because that would make him a bad son.

He opened his mouth to tell her that he had something in his eye and that he was just being dramatic but the words wouldn’t come.Simon had one friend and he missed his dad and his only happy place was learning stuff because it was the only thing in his life he felt like he had control over. Simon felt sad and drained, like someone had knocked the wind out of him, sucked all the happiness that he’d had when he woke up right out of his body. He was crying more by the time he finally gave his answer.

“I don’t have any friends, and I hate school, and I miss dad.” he choked out through sobs. It felt cathartic in a way even through crying made Simon feel like an absolute loser and dork who couldn’t control his own feelings. His mother pulled him into a hug and Simon stayed there because sometimes you need to be held even if it makes you feel like you haven’t matured at all from when you were five. Archduke Franz Ferdinand heard the commotion and came to sit at his feet as a show of affection. His mother ruffled his hair and didn’t ask him to elaborate and didn’t make him feel like he was irrational for being upset.Eventually, Simon did stop crying and he stopped hugging his mom. Wiping the remaining tears away he began to apologize. “I’m sorry for being so sensitive.” he offered. His mother shook her head.

“Don’t do that Simon, don’t apologize for being sad. I want you to understand that there is nothing wrong with being hurt by something, okay?” she said. Simon nodded in response to the lesson. “Do you still want me to invite Grace over?” she asked. Simon thought for a moment. Grace was a good friend and having her around always made Simon feel a little better. And besides, he wanted to see what she’d gotten him for a present.

“Yeah, I still want her to come over.” he responded. His mother nodded and walked away leaving Simon to finish breakfast on his own. Once that was done Simon got dressed and ready and did feel better about the day. He figured that maybe he should be more honest about his feelings with his mother more frequently if it meant that he’d actually feel better about things. He also decided that even if he didn’t get anything from his dad today it was okay because he had a mother that loved him very much.

Grace came a bit later in the day armed with a birthday gift. “What is it?” Simon asked. Grace clutched the present close to her and shook her head.

“I’m not telling you, you’ll have to wait until after cake and ice cream.” she said. Simon raised his objection to this.

“It’s my birthday, how come you get to decide when the presents are given out?” he asked. Grace gave her answer.

“Through the transitive gift giving property, until the gift leaves my hands it belongs to me and not you. As it is my property I get to decide when it is shared and therefore I do get to decide when you get the gift.” she said smugly. Simon rolled his eyes.

“Did you make that up on the spot?” he asked. Grace shook her head and laughed.

“I practiced in the car.” she said. Simon laughed in response and shot back.

“How are you the cool one in this friendship?” he asked through his own laughter. Grace shrugged at this. The lights were turned off, the candles lit and the happy birthday song sung. Simon made his wish and though he didn’t believe in them Simon wished for his dad to come home. The two sat down to enjoy their servings of cake and ice cream while continuing their on-going joint crusade against chocolate ice cream and those that claim to enjoy it. After the desserts gifts were handed out. Simon unwrapped his present from his mother which was of course the requested encyclopedia.

It met all of Simon’s requirements for an awesome gift that being that he’d love it forever. Then was Grace’s gift. Cautionsouly Simon opened the present and was met with a very large, old looking map.It wasn’t until he read the bottom of the map that Simon became utterly excited. The bottom of the map read “The Kingdom of Esmoroth” and looking at it, the map displayed a perfect recreation of the kingdom, just as he’d imagined it.

“I saw that you’d drawn a rough map of what the place looked like so I took it to a cartographer and asked them to make a real map of it! What do you think?” Grace asked. Simon’s smile was wider than the Grand Canyon.

“I think that you're the best, best friend ever.” was his response and he meant it.


	11. The Reunion

Simon sat on the couch with his legs tucked to his chest as he tried to focus on the movie. He knew that he wasn’t supposed to sit that way on the couch but it was the only way he could think to calm himself. His mother had informed him that there was something important happening in the next few days three days ago and with every passing second his anxiety over what it could be grew. Maybe he was moving several states away and would never see Grace again.

Maybe his parents were getting divorced or worse, maybe his father had… Simon didn’t let himself finish that thought. It was too dark even for his nervous brain. Still, maybe they’d fallen on hard times and were losing the house. With his father gone what if it was up to him to help support the family? Simon made a mental note that he’d find a way to help his mother in any way he could in case that happened.

The nervous thoughts that plagued Simon’s mind kept him from focusing on the movie he was trying to watch. Looking over at Grace who was playing some game on her phone he sighed and turned it off. No use in wasting electricity when neither of them were watching it. Especially true if Simon would have to start worrying about bills in case his thoughts about their financial situation were true. Simon tucked his legs closer to his chest and Grace looked up at him from her phone.

“Are you okay? You’ve seemed really worried about something all day.” she said. Grace looked genuinely concerned and Simon felt awful about it. He hated making Grace worry about him because she never made him do the same. Grace never seemed to need help with anything and yet she constantly needed to calm him down. And this was going to be yet another example of that. Simon let out a sigh and decided to tell the truth about what was going on.

“My mom says that something importanting is happening soon and I guess I’m just really nervous that it’s something bad.” he explained. Grace put a comforting hand on his shoulder.

“Don’t worry. If it was something bad do you really think your mom would keep it from you?” she asked. Simon subtly untucked his legs but still kept them near his chest. He looked away from her.

“I guess not.” Simon responded. Grace gave him one of her winning smiles that he knew she practiced in the mirror so that they’d be perfect when she needed to use one.

“Then don’t worry about it, especially because whatever happens i’ll be there for you.” she added. Simon smiled at this before frowning. He posed his best friend a question

“Hey Grace, what if I lived really far away? Would you still be my best friend?” To his surprise Grace nodded quickly and gave her answer in response.

“Of course! I’d call you everyday and we’d spend time together on weekends because I’d come and visit you.” she explained. Now it was Grace’s turn to frown. “Simon, we’re always going to be best friends, don’t ever think differently.” Grace added. Now Simon smiled for real and took his legs off of the couch completely as he relaxed. Grace was always really good at calming him down. Simon was unsure how he’d ever managed without her. He reminded himself that he’d have to be the best friend ever to pay her back for it.

“You’re the best Grace.” he said. Grace laughed at his complement before responding.

“Yeah, I know.” she said and before Simon could hit her with a pillow in response the sound of the doorbell ringing was heard. Simon waited expectantly for his mother to answer but instead a different turn of events occurred.

“Simon, I have my hands full could you get that?” his mother called from the kitchen. Simon did as was asked and walked over to the front door. He opened it casually not even bothering to look up at first.

“No hug for your old dad?” the person in the doorway said. Simon knew that voice, of course he knew that voice. He looked up awestruck at his father. Simon wasn’t sure that this all wasn’t a dream he was having to make himself feel better about his dad being gone. Then again his dream usually had a lot more fish and swimming pools for some reason, so it was possible that this was reality. His dad hugged him and Simon knew it was real.

“I missed you so much.” Simon choked out through happy tears as he hugged his father in return. Eventually his mother made her way from the kitchen and joined in the hug. Simon had never felt as happy or as complete as he did in that very moment. Eventually the family hug ended and his dad began talking again.

“I wanted to be there for your birthday but dates got moved around and flights got canceled, but I’m here now, I’m sorry I was late.” he said. Simon wiped his face and shook his head.

“It’s fine, I’m just happy that you're back.” he said. Simon mind raced a mile a minute as he tried to decide what he’d tell his dad about first. So much had happened since he left that he’d wished he could talk to his dad about. Maybe he’d have some advice for him about being a friendless loser. Simon of course didn’t think that would actually be possible, both of his parents had tons of friends growing up.

But maybe he’d tell his dad about creating the Esmoroth trilogy first and mention how he’d been inspired by the stories they used to write together. Maybe he’d mention that he was really interested in astronomy now and show him the really big star chat that he’d made that now hung over his bed in it’s glorious detail. Or maybe he should start with stories of all of the funny things that Archduke Franz Ferdinand had done while he was gone considering that the dog was now running around barking just as excited for his fathers return as he was.

What Simon would start with was chosen for him as hearing the commotion Grace walked over to the door and stared at all of them.There was a pause as Simon realized that Grace had never met his father before. He started to introduce them when his father started instead.

“Simon, you didn’t tell me you got a girlfriend while I was away.” he said through laughter. Simon felt his ears grow hot with embarrassment at that being the first thing his father said to his best friend. In all honesty it could have been worse but that was certainly up there in terms of things that would make Simon want to crawl into a hole and never be seen or heard from again.

“She’s not my girlfriend.” Simon corrected. “She's my best friend.” he clarified. His dad chuckled and ruffled his hair just like his mom always did.

“I’m just messing with you.” he responded. The knowledge that his father was joking didn’t make Simon any less embarrassed and he probably would have said that if not for Grace introducing herself.

“Nice to meet you Mr. Laurent, my name is Grace.” she said politely. Simon was always shocked by how quickly Grace could go from being childish and silly to being a prim and proper symbol of polite society. The first time he’d watched her introduce herself to an adult it had been whiplash to see Grace go from sticking her tongue out at him and calling him a huge nerd to speaking with an air of haughtiness. It was even funnier to see her use that act on her dad who was probably the last person who needed it.

“You can just call me Doug.” he offered kindly. Grace quickly shook her head in response.

“I’m sorry but physically I can’t do that.” she said. “But, it's very nice to meet you, Simon has told me a lot about you.” she added. Simon knew that what she’d said wasn’t technically true and he was sure Grace knew it as well. But Grace had once told him that sometimes to make a good first impression you have to stretch the truth just a little and it was true that Simon looked up to his father so he didn’t see anything wrong with it.

“All good things I hope?” his father responded. Grace nodded and smiled her professional people pleaser smile.

“Of course! He really looks up to you.” she said. Simon’s father looked at him in response with a proud smile. Simon had missed having his father around to feel proud of him. He almost wanted to hug Grace for giving him this moment but then again one of his parents would probably make a comment about her being his girlfriend and then he’d be all embarrassed again. The moment was over quickly as his dad came inside to sit on the couch and his mother went to the kitchen to get snacks. Simon did his best to update his father about everything he could, while Grace gave details that she was there for.

The atmosphere was calm as they all sat there sharing stories of the many adventures of Grace and Simon as well as doing their best not to get distracted from telling the stories by joking around with each other. As the room settled down and the air began still in between stories Grace brought up something that was on her mind.

“Can I ask you something Mr Laurent?” she asked. Simon’s father nodded. “Laurent is a French last name, do you speak any French?” she asked. Simon’s father laughed and gave his response in french.

“Je parle français, Grace. Merci d'avoir posé la question.” he responded. Grace looked around nervously.

“I don’t actually speak French so I don’t know what you said.” she replied. At that his father let out a hearty laugh.

“I do speak French.” he said to add clarity. “You speak any other languages?” he asked. Grace nodded quickly.

“I’m fluent in Spanish, passably conversational in German, and I can speak a little Manderian. No french though, my parents didn’t think it was a useful language. No offence.” she added quickly. Simon’s father waved her off.

“None taken. And that is a very impressive list of languages.” he said before turning to Simon.

“Do you remember any of the French I taught you?” he asked. Both his father and Grace now stared at him expectantly. Simon felt his heart race at the idea that he’d be disappointing both his father and his best friend in one fell swoop unless you could conjure any of the French he’d learned years ago for right now. Simon tried to calm himself down, it was okay that he didn’t remember, no one would be mad at him for it.

“I don’t remember any, it's been a long time.” he said embarrassed. His father grinned at him.

“Well don’t worry, now that I’m back there’s plenty of time to teach you more.” he offered. Simon felt like a weight was lifted off of his chest. His dad really was back.

“I’ve got to show you something.” Simon said before rushing upstairs. He entered his room and cursed himself that he wasn’t more organized as he shuffled around piles of empty granola bar wrappers, scratch paper, and half finished Esmoroth notes to find what he was looking for. Rushing back downstairs Simon proudly revealed what he’d been working on to his father. His first ever carving, which happened to be of Isaiah from the Esmoroth trilogy. His father held the figure in his hands as he examined it.

“You made this?” he asked after looking at it for a while. Simon nodded. “It’s amazing.” his father said. Simon swelled with pride at the complement.

“They’re not as good as yours yet but I’m getting better.” Simon responded. His dad smiled in return.

“That’s what matters, that we all get a little better everyday.” he said. Simon wanted to cringe at the sappiness of his fathers statement but maybe because he was happy to have his father back or maybe because the sentiment was truly moving, Simon nodded instead.


	12. The Balcony

Recently some renovation had been done to the Monroe house. Expansion of rooms, remodeled bathrooms, things like that. As the renovation had massively disrupted Grace’s life, with random people she didn’t know constantly running around and the sounds of construction everywhere while she tried to relax, as a present for being so patient her parents allowed her to choose a renovation for her own room. At first she thought she might remodel her bathroom or have a walk-in closet installed but ultimately it was Simon who gave her the idea she would use.

“I think you should add a balcony to your room.” he’d said to her when she’d asked him over the phone. A balcony wasn’t even something she’d considered and she was curious to hear Simon’s thought process on the matter.

“Why a balcony?” Grace had asked.

“Because, I saw in this movie where these two friends always hung out on a balcony. Like, one would leave a ladder for the other and she’d come knock on the friends window and they’d sit on the balcony and talk and hang out. I thought it was cool.” he explained. Grace always found Simon’s thought process to be interesting the very least and while a balcony wasn’t very practical she couldn’t stop thinking about the idea. So when her parents asked her what renovation she wanted for her room Grace requested a balcony and they built it on. 

When it was completed Grace had to thank Simon because she honestly did fall in love with it right away. Her room wasn’t at the very top of the house but it was still high enough up that when Grace opened the big window and walked out onto it she could look out across the neighborhood and pretend that she was a princess about to belt out a song. Of course she’d been informed by her parents that if she tried she’d be in big trouble and she wouldn’t have anyway because Grace couldn't stand doing things in front of people unless she was profficent. 

She’d been playing the violin for three years and she’d still never performed in front of anyone besides her parents and her instructor. In a way she admired Simon for his complete and utter commitment to doing things even when he was bad at them. He worked on Esmoroth despite the fact that it had become even more bloated and over-written as time had passed and he shared it with whoever would listen. He played the piano even when he messed up notes and played things in the wrong order and he would play for anyone.

He did his best to speak in French even when it came out incomprehensible and he’d practice on anyone because he was not at all afraid of being bad at something in front of people. Grace liked looking like she was effortlessly great at everything even if it took years of secret effort. She wouldn’t sing if she thought she couldn’t hit the note or share a half-finished routine. To Grace that wasn’t a flaw, it was a part of her character. There was nothing wrong with wanting to only present the best of yourself and she resented the idea that there was.

These were the things that Grace would sit and ponder while she relaxed on the balcony. She’d sit there, sometimes with Simon over the phone but most times alone, and she’d think about life.  
She’d think about who she was and who she was going to be. She’d write down moves that she wanted to try or try and remember the dreams she’d had and sometimes if she went to bed early enough Grace could be up in time to watch the sunrise over the clouds and she’d feel both selfish and lucky that this was an experience that she was able to have. 

Simon also loved the balcony which made sense considering the fact that it had been his idea. Whenever her parents said it was okay for Simon to come over his mother or father would drop him off and exchange words with her parents while Simon ran over to the side of the house and climbed the ladder she left out for him. He’d knock on the window and Grace would open it and either let him into her bedroom or join him out there. It was a routine for them that when Simon came over the first thing they’d do was sit on the balcony.

It was one of those times with the two on Grace’s balcony with Simon talking about Esmoroth or something that Grace had completely zoned out of where Grace decided that maybe she was good enough at the violin to play for someone who wasn’t her parents or her teacher. So she’d turned to Simon and cut off his long winded rant about how hard it was to write fight scenes when she’d asked him about something.

“Hey Simon, do you want to hear me play something on the violin?” she asked. Simon stopped his rant and responded.

“I forgot you played the violin. Yeah, of course I want to hear it.” he said. Grace nodded and re-entered her bedroom to grab her instrument. In all honesty she was still a bit terrified to perform in case something went wrong and her carefully cultivated image of effortless perfection was shattered but this was a piece she’d practiced for a long time. When she returned to the balcony with her instrument Simon sat down in front of her as if she was about to put on the show of a lifetime and Grace carefully took her bow to the strings and played. 

The reason Grace loved dance so thoroughly was the fact that all variables of her success rested on her alone. The strength of her performance was solely on her shoulders and that was how she liked it, only having to worry about herself to achieve perfection. Playing the violin was different, she had to work alongside an instrument, to lead and to be led by the sounds that were pulled from the strings. There was another variable, raw creative emotion channeled through a conductor rather than simply through herself. 

And yet as she played on it felt less like the violin was a conductor for her emotion through music but more of an extension of herself. She was the notes and she was present in every movement of the bow along the strings. As she played Grace was in playing the violin as she was in dancing, she was abject perfection. She concluded the song, it being relatively short and Simon clapped like it was the best thing he’d ever heard.Grace felt proud that she’d worked up the courage to do it and that it had paid off.

“Rosemary’s theme from the Giver.” Simon said “Nice choice.” he added complementing what she’d just played. Grace gave an earnest smile and explained her thought process.

“When you played the piano for me that was the song you played. So I figured I play it for you.” she responded, Simon looked shocked and Grace considered it a fair reaction based upon the fact that he’d done that almost two years ago now and she remembered it. To Simon that had probably been a very mundane and insignificant memory but to Grace it had been monumental. Just as Simon crying in front of her on the first day they met had meant something to her that it hadn’t to him so had this.

“I can’t believe you remembered that.” he said and he sounded fairly impressed by that though Grace wasn’t sure if he’d been impressed by the fact that she remembered what he played or remembered that it had happened at all. She began packing her instrument away when Simon added something to his statement. “You know, that would probably make a pretty awesome duet.” he mused and Grace was reminded all that time ago of asking her instructor in the violin and piano went well together.

At the time Grace had taken it as a sign that she and Simon were cosmically intertwined to be friends. Grace didn’t know if that cosmic destiny stuff was true but she wanted it to be and so when she saw a sign that her and Simon were supposed to meet she grasped onto it. Recalling that now it did make Grace want to duet that song with Simon and so she said so despite the fact she’d never performed a duet in her life and had no idea how to do so.

“That sounds great! Let’s do that the next time I’m over at your house.” she said as she opened the window and walked back inside. She put her violin away and because it was getting a bit cold outside Simon came in too. The rest of that day was uneventful. Eventually Simon was picked up, Grace was called to dinner and she didn’t think about the duet for a while. On some day not long after that one she’d been on the phone with Simon and he’d off-handedly reminded her to bring her violin over to his house the next time so they could practice and Grace frowned.

She hated practicing in front of people. She practiced alongside her fellow dancers out of obligation and because of the fact that they were in the same boat. But when she was home, and when she worked on the violin, she limited the number of people who could see her to none save for an instructor. The concept of practicing required an inherent vulnerability that Grace did not like to share when she didn’t have to. A performance was a highly cultivated collection of all the best parts of yourself, a practice was everything you had to cultivate out.

The existence of a practice necessarily shattered her goal of having to put on a front of perfection in all things. In other words, if she practiced alongside Simon he’d hear the sour notes, the forgotten entrances. He’d know the perfection that she presented wasn’t effortless. He’d know she wasn’t the best at everything like he often called her. And that terrified Grace not because she only wanted to be seen as flawless but because she’d spent so long presenting herself that way that the idea of anyone liking her as a non-perfect person was ludacris.

She pantomimed natural flawlessness for everyone including her parents even though she knew they would love her regardless because some deep down part of her feared that if she wasn’t naturally good at things they would see her as a burden. If she couldn’t fail in front of them how could she allow herself to fail in front of Simon who unlike her parents, had no natural obligation to her. If she stopped being the cool and awesome person who was good at everything Simon would have no reason to stick around.

And so Grace practiced the violin more than she’d ever practiced it before in the hopes of being good enough to not make any mistakes when she and Simon dueted that weekend. She worked hard because children aren't rational and to Grace if she wasn’t the best at everything Simon wouldn’t want to be her friend so she’d have to be the best at this. Even her instructor noticed a drastic improvement in their practice the day before she and Simon had agreed to duet. She took her violin and had a silent car ride with Pierce to the Laurent household.

“Hey Grace, great to see you.” Mr Laurent had said when he opened the door.

“Hi Mr Laurent.” she’d responded. Grace wasn’t trying to be cold, but her mind was so thoroughly focused on the need to be perfect for this duet that she didn’t have much brain space left for small talk.

“Simon told us you two are going to perform a song, I can’t wait to hear it.” he added as Grace stepped into the house. Upon hearing that Grace wanted to rush to the nearest bathroom and vomit. It was terrifying enough to have to perform a duet which she’d never done before, she’d also just had an audience sprung upon her. She tried not to be mad at Simon because there was no way he could know about how it would make her feel and he probably thought that she already knew which she probably should have.

Upon walking further into the house she found Simon reading over some printed out sheet music and tapping away on the keys seemingly practicing disparate parts in no particular order. How brave he had to be to play like that and be seemingly unaware of how it sounded. Or even more interestingly to be completely aware of how it sounded and to do it anyway. Grace took a deep breath and addressed him.

“Hey Simon, I’m here.” she said. Simon looked up from the keys and gave her a smile. 

“Awesome, do you want to warm up before we start playing or do you want to jump right in?” he asked. Grace considered this for a moment and looked over what she knew. Warming up was essential to sounding right before you played but on the other hand Grace knew what warm-ups sounded like. They did not fit with the perfectly cultivated image of herself that she was clinging onto for the sake of her friendship so despite her better judgement she would forego them. This was a test of her prowess and of her ability to achieve perfection.

“Let’s just jump right in.” she said. Simon nodded and turned back to his sheet music as his parents entered the room. Grace felt her throat tighten as he began a count and suddenly she felt as though she was being crushed under the weight of her own fears. She could imagine it so vividly, the awful screeching emitting from her violin as the faces of the Laurent family turned to disgust and Simon announced that he no longer wanted to be friends with her. It was all so painfully clear and Grace knew that she had to be perfect to avoid it.

It was almost time for her to begin playing and she wanted to run towards the bathroom and lock herself in as a measure to never have to do this again. Grace took a mental breath. She was Grace Kathrine Monroe. She had been perfect before and she could do it again. She was the best at everything and she’d proved it countless times. She could prove it this time too. No one would find out her imperfections because she wouldn’t give them the chance to. She entered on time and played like her life was on line.

Maybe in her mind her life was on the line in a way and so she channeled it into every movement of her bow. When they’d concluded they received a standing ovation from Simon’s parents and sure it was nothing compared to an audience full of recital goers but in a way it almost felt better. How odd to have a room full of people cheering for you be dwarfed by just your friend’s parents. Grace made a mental note to ponder why the next time she sat alone on her balcony and looked over her small portion of the world.


	13. The Scrapyard

Simon's complete and utter love affair with reading was apparent by just one look at his room. Shelves over-flowing with a never ending supply of fantasy from the most common of mainstream middle grade fiction to things like the Silmarillion which was so far above his reading level that it had been almost a year and he still wasn’t half-way through. And that was if you were only looking at his room. God have mercy on your soul if you were talking to Simon and he managed to steer the topic of conversation.

You’d be no doubt subjected to an hours long rant about fantasy novels and his favorite authors and the tropes that he couldn’t stand. And that was if he didn’t break off half-way through to talk about his own work in progress which he’d dubbed the most incredible work of fiction to never be completed. Simon swore up and down that he was almost finished with it but even he knew he’d be writing it forever. Everytime he felt almost satisfied with it he’d read a new series and have tons of new ideas he’d want to incorporate.

Despite his clear love of the escapism fantasy provided however Simon was very picky about his reading habits. Simon knew he found comfort in narrative structure and tropes, in chosen ones and magical destiny’s. Those things brought a safety to a story and venturing away from those things made him uncomfortable. To Simon reading something outside of the safety of his comfortable fantasy tropes was akin to leaving a kiddy pool and being thrown into the middle of the ocean.

So when his father gifted him a sci-fi novel Simon had eyed it suspiciously. He’d wanted to mention that he didn’t read stuff like this and that he wasn’t interested in investing himself in a new genre but he knew better than to be ungrateful and besides his father was trying and hadn’t been back for long so Simon had accepted the gift without hesitation. And Simon had been prepared for that to be the end of it. He figured he’d put it on the back of his bookshelf and never touch it.

But when you make plans, even little ones, they almost never seem to work out so that was not what happened. Instead, on a day that was otherwise uneventful Grace had been over at his house as she was many times before and he’d asked her to grab something from near his bookshelf and that had been a catalyst. Grace had seen the book and grabbed it looking over its cover and name and addressed him.

“Simon, I didn't know you read this series.” she said gesturing to the book. Simon looked up from his current drawing and eyed the book Grace held recognizing it as the one book on the shelf that he’d actually never read.

“I don’t, my dad gave it to me but I’m not into sci-fi.” he responded before turning back to his artwork. Grace thumbed through the pages while laughing to herself.

“How can you know that you don’t like sci-fi if you refuse to read it?” she questioned. Simon couldn’t think of a response so he didn’t give one. Grace returned the book to where she’d gotten it from. “Well for the record I like that series.” she muttered before grabbing the markers that Simon had requested and dropping them on his desk before going back to making edits of dance clips on her phone. That detail she’d given about her liking the series probably shouldn’t have made Simon read the book.

He should have been desercening enough on his own to branch out to new genres even if he didn’t have the Grace seal of approval looming over him. But Simon wasn’t the type of person who walked up to strangers his age to talk to them and he wasn’t the type of person who explored outside of what was easy and comfortable because he didn’t see the use in trying to change things that worked. Simon liked structure, but maybe he trusted Grace more than he liked structure so despite his initial hesitation about it he read the book.

Simon thought it was pretty good which made sense because in the almost three years that he’d known her Grace was never one to waste her time on something that wasn’t at least good enough for her standards. Simon considered their friendship to be the exception to that rule. It of course wasn’t enough to spark a complete and total renovation of his interests like reading the Chronicles of Narnia had been but it was good. What had sparked a total renovation of his interest however had been the technology described. Futuristic technology captured his interest.

It hadn’t been the weapons to take hold of his heart however, it had been the most practical things. He liked the idea of robots that acted to fix mundane issues, of reinvented food management and distribution systems that ended world hunger, of housing that was both efficient and cost effective. While most would be focusing on the story of these space bound epics Simon could only wonder how things like water refining worked in the future. He started reading more sci-fi but rather than read the stories he’d quickly scan through them.

When he found a tidbit of practical information regarding the way the world worked and how the society functioned on a technological basis he’d take a yellow highlighter and highlight the phrase. It drove his mother up the wall but Simon felt he had to. What if one day someone with a great mind for things like this was trying to change the world and needed inspiration. Simon could present this person with the ideas and maybe they’d change the world for the better. Simon told all of this to Grace over the phone during one of their balcony talks.

“If you’re so hyped about all that future stuff and changing the world why don’t you do it?” Grace asked him. Simon took a pause after that question.

“...what?” he asked, unsure if he’d heard her correctly. 

“You want all that stuff to get implemented so that the world can be changed right?” she asked.

“Yeah, I’ve run the numbers and stuff like the food distribution system they have in the Glaxaygate series would end world hunger.” he explained.

“Then why don’t you figure out how to make that distribution system in real life and end world hunger for us.” she asked. The tone in her voice was mostly joking but a part of it was serious and that scared Simon more than anything.

“Do you know the level of engineering expertise I’d have to have to make something anywhere near that complicated. I mean outside of the obvious implementation issues, I have no idea how to build something out of metal or use energy to power things. I’m not that smart Grace.” he responded. He could hear Grace sigh exasperatedly over the phone.

“You’ve got to stop selling yourself short. You’re smart enough to do whatever you want. If you want to build something that makes the world a better place then do that. The only thing stopping you from doing something that changes everything is yourself.” she asserted. Simon corrected what he saw as a blatant falsehood.

“The only thing stopping me is not having the knowledge, the tools or the skills to complete a project anything like that.” he said.

“Then don’t do that, learn how to do something smaller and use what you learn to make something game-changing in the future.” she responded. Simon wanted to argue but thinking about it he decided against it. No one won arguments with Grace and he was not an exception in that case. Besides, what she said did make sense. Maybe he couldn’t build a globe spanning food distribution network but maybe he could make something smaller. Maybe he could start by reading up on power sources.

So Simon decided to do just that. He went to the library and brought home countless books on power sources, and on technical engineering and robotics. All of it was above his reading level but that had never stopped him before. Simon had been inspired in only the way that young idealistic children can be and to Simon the idea that he could change the world was a foregone conclusion because Grace had said so and she was always right. He could do it because he wanted to make the world better and he’d been told by movies that wanting it was enough.

And yes he recognized that just wanting something to happen didn’t really make it happen but that was why he had books. And after reading tons of them his want to make an advanced food distribution system had morphed completely into a want to design other things but his goal of improving the world never wavered. He wanted to make something that changed the world because people who did that were remembered and Simon wanted to be remembered as someone who did something good.

Simon wanted to start building things the second he’d gotten it into his head that maybe he’d like to build a robot but he’d been told by his parents that he wasn’t allowed to go to the nearby scrapyard and search for things to salvage for a potential project. Normally that would have been the end of it as Simon tended to be very respectful of his parents rules but in his mind they were preventing him from possibly changing the world and so it was okay to disobey them just this one time for science.

“I’m going to walk Archduke Franz Ferdinand!” he yelled towards the kitchen as he stood near the door about to head out with the dog close behind wagging it’s tail excitedly.

“Alright!” his mother called back and Simon took it as his cue to leave. What he’d said wasn’t a lie technically, he was going to walk Archduke Franz Ferdinand, he was just also going to walk over to the scrapyard and scavenge for scraps of metal and wiring so that he could build a robot. The dog happily walked ahead and Simon took notice of his neighborhood with it’s tiny houses and quiet streets. It all looked oddly foreign. Simon could probably make a map of Grace’s neighborhood by memory but that was because her’s was so dynamic and interesting.

Simon didn’t consider himself an artist, he was a writer first, an engineer second, and artist third; but he had what his mother called artistic sensibilities. He could recognize things that were worthy of being captured as art and he could recognize what things were boring and normal. Grace would have disagreed with his thinking had she been with him for this walk, Grace had once told him there was art in everything. Simon hated to disagree with Grace but he was sure she was wrong.

The idea that someone could look at something like Grace’s dancing, which was the closest thing to abject artistic perfection Simon could think of, and a garbage can while believing that both had artistic merit was ludacris to him. Some things just didn’t hold the same artistic value as other things and it wasn’t a value judgement, in his opinion it was just fact. When he’d told her that she’d responded that he missed the point and Simon had been too stubborn to ask what that even meant.

He made his way to the dump and tied Archduke Franz Ferdinand to a sturdy pole while he looked around. He may have been an overambitious kid but he wasn’t looking to actually get hurt for the sake of a project so mostly Simon just poked around the scrapyard searching for anything that might be usable and shoving it in his book bag. Springs, motors, buttons, and batteries were all taken from broken electronics using a screwdriver he may or may not have borrowed without permission.

After he’d gathered what he considered to be enough for the project he was working on he zipped his backpack and untied Archduke Franz Ferdinand before returning to his house. He hoped he hadn’t been gone for too long and wasn’t about to walk into an ambush. He prepared himself to answer a barrage of questions and to defend his backpack like his life depended on it but when he entered he was only greeted with the smell of dinner cooking. His dad walked over to him casually.

“Put your shoes and backpack away and go get cleaned up for dinner, your mom made meatloaf.” he said with more excitement than Simon thought meatloaf required. Simon let out a sigh of relief and began walking upstairs to put away his things before his dad added something. “Oh, and if you're going to borrow my tools for secret adventures, try to at least leave the garage in a state similar to how it was.” he said. Simon was thrown off kilter by the offhand comment.

“You knew?” he asked. His father nodded in response. Simon dug the screwdriver out of his bag and handed it back. “Please don’t tell mom.” he begged. His father laughed at this.

“Your mother knows too, we watched you walk over there and waited in case you were in trouble. By the way, look up more when you're walking, it is uncomfortably easy to follow you without you noticing.” he said. Simon nodded and went upstairs to stow his parts and to wash his hands. He made a mental note to check for people following him more often before he joined his family for dinner. After the meal was complete Simon really wanted to start working on what he’d found but he’d promised his dad that he’d learn some French that day and so he did.

He tried not to get frustrated with the nonsensical use of vowels and such in the French language and instead actually did manage to get some progress made in the learning of the language. After he was satisfied Simon rushed upstairs in order to make an official tally of exactly what he’d gathered on his excursion and what he could do with it. His biggest find by far had been the small motor he’d discovered and Simon had no doubt it could be put to excellent use if it still worked.

He didn’t know what you were supposed to do with the materials that you found in a scrapyard, he figured he’d have to get another book before he would know but at the very least he could start working on concepts for what he’d make. He had plenty of ideas and books for inspiration on that front and while a small motorized robot built of scraps wasn’t by any means world changing it was the start to learning a skill which he could maybe use to change the world if he was lucky.

He remembered what Grace had said to him about the only thing stopping him from changing the world being himself and mentioning that he sold himself short. He wasn’t exactly sure that he sold himself short, just that Grace had more faith in him than he did. But maybe he could use a more positive mindset. Archduke Franz Ferdinand barked at a squirrel he saw outside of his bedroom window and Simon decided he’d had enough introspective thought for one night. As he got ready to go to sleep Simon dreamed of a world where he made a difference.


	14. The Park

Grace and Simon walked along together in the park on a cool Saturday afternoon. The day before Grace had performed in yet another recital and she was still excited from it. As Simon walked next to her she couldn’t help but twirl as she recounted how her instructor had said that she was close to the level of a high school dancer. Grace completed yet another spin and was about to continue recounting her story when something caught her eye and she stopped. Walking back towards Simon who was a few steps behind her she touched his hair.

“What are you doing that for?” he asked. Grace stopped touching his hair and answered.

“You had a leaf in your hair. Also, is your hair getting longer?” she questioned now clearly able to see the few extra inches that it had grown now that she was up close. Simon nodded.

“Yeah, I’m growing it out, do you like it?” he questioned. Simon's voice went up in that way it always did when he was nervous and Grace laughed a little inside because his voice always did that when he wanted her approval and she wasn’t quite sure why he cared. But, even if she didn’t know why Simon wanted her approval she knew he wanted it and because Simon was her best friend and she cared about him she’d give him approval until he learned to get approval from himself.

“I think it makes you look cute.” Grace said and she meant it. Grace could almost swear she saw pink rising in Simon’s ears at the comment. She wasn’t sure how long he intended to grow his hair out but she could imagine Simon with long hair and she thought it would frame his face nicely. Then she imagined that, knowing Simon, it’d probably get everywhere and constantly fall into his face. She figured his mom would probably make him put it in a ponytail for practicality. Grace started to say something else but was distracted by the sound of a pained meow.

“What was that?” Simon asked as the two looked around the park for the source of the sound. The area was relatively empty which was good because the both of them were loud and unabashedly embarrassing when it came to the things that they loved. However the meow had broken the illusion of solitude they’d had and both now wanted to locate the animal at its source. Walking over towards the bush where the sound had been heard Grace pulled the leaves away to reveal a small, sick looking tan kitten.

“It’s a kitten!” Grace practically cooed. The thing was alone and curled up in the bush likely searching for warmth. It’s eyes were swelled shut and it’s meowing sounded pained, as if it took considerable effort. Simon walked over to her side and looked at the kitten as laid in the bush.

“Based on it’s size and it’s ear curl I’d say this kitten is about three weeks old.” he assessed. Grace gave Simon a curious look about his random and useful knowledge. “I read it in a book once,” he explained. “And anyway based on how dirty and small it is the mom probably left it. Sometimes mother cats leave because the kitten is sick and they don’t want the rest of the litter to get infected, so that’s probably why.” he explained.

“You know a lot of random stuff Simon.” Grace said. Simon shrugged at this, likely because he knew it was true. “Anyway look at this poor thing,” she said sadly. “It will die if we don’t get help.” she added. Simon looked weary at the prospect of touching the thing.

“Cats carry tons of diseases…” he started before trailing off. Grace looked at him annoyed by his apathy at the situation.

“Simon, it will die if we don’t help!” she said before grabbing his shoulders and shaking him. “D-I-E die! We can’t just sit back and let that happen, it would make us bad people.” she said seriously. Simon relented in his apathy and finally agreed with Grace.

“Alright, alright. If we want to save it we’ll have to get it to a vet.” he explained. Grace pulled out her phone and searched for nearby vets.

“There’s one not too far from here, we can make it twenty minutes if we run.” she said. Simon let out an annoyed groan.

“Can’t we just ask Peirce to pick us up and drive us over there?” he asked. Grace glared at him and Simon took a step back.

“Simon, imagine if when your parents were walking along at the park they saw a puppy in the bushes abandoned by its mother and did nothing and it died. Imagine that puppy was Archduke Franz Ferdinand. Now, do you want to wait for the car or do you want to save the cat?” she asked. That seemed to finally help Simon to fully get on board with their journey as he nodded and fully relented.

“Lead the way.” he said and Grace followed the GPS on her phone as the two made the twenty minute walk towards the clinic in the hope that they could help save the poor thing’s life. Grace held the animal in her hands after Simon had made it clear he wasn’t touching it for fear of the diseases it carried and the two recklessly crossed streets without looking up, single-minded in theri goal of reaching the veterinary office. Finally the two did arrive and burst through the doors into the waiting room.

“This cat needs medical attention!” Grace announced as the two entered. Luckily for them they were the only people who were in the waiting room or else that entrance probably would have been embarrassing at least in Grace’s eyes. The receptionist stepped from behind the desk to talk to them.

“What’s going on?” she asked as she looked at the animal Grace cupped in her hands. Grace did her best to quickly explain the events that preceded the two bursting into the area.

“Me and my friend found this sick cat outside and we need you to help it.” Grace said. She handed the woman the kitten and reached for her backpack intending to pull out her wallet. “I can pay-” Grace began before the woman waved her off.

“We’ll give this baby a check up on the house, just go wash your hands. Cats carry a lot of diseases you know.” she said before taking the kitten to the observation room. Simon gave Grace a smug look over his correct assessment of cats and their germ carrying habits and she rolled her eyes at his smugness before washing her hands. The two sat in the waiting room and Grace tapped her foot anxiously as she waited with baited breath for the return of the news on the cat.

“Should we call your parents to tell them that we left the park?” Simon questioned. Grace thought for a moment about which of those options would end with her getting in trouble and elected to answer with the one that did not.

‘No, we’ll be back before Peirce comes to pick us up.” she responded as a man in a light blue lab coat excited the back and handed the kitten back to Grace.

“I looked her over and while she is a little sick a few doses of antibiotics will be enough to keep her healthy.” he said handing Grace a pill bottle. “The instructions are on the side.” he explained and Grace turned to see that they were in fact on the side of the bottle. “What I’m more concerned about is how young she is, kittens are supposed to stay with their mothers for eight weeks and she’s only three.” Grace’s brow furrowed at the news.

“What can I do?” she asked. The doctor explained to her the steps she’d need to take in order to keep a kitten alive until it reached the age where it could be treated like a regular cat. Grace listened to all of this dutifully. She had always had a fondness for animals, specifically the small and weak. Simon had once joked that it was that same fondness that led her to spend time with him Grace obviously knew this to be false. She hung out with Simon because she liked Simon, she protected small animals because she needed to.

Someone had to look out for the things that were tiny and small and needed help from people who were bigger and so ever since she was very little she’d always tried to. Her father often recounted a story of when Grace was no older than three and was in a stroller at the park and upon seeing a baby bird on the ground had attempted to escape to put it back in the nest and refused to stop crying until it was safe. Grace bought one of the small transportation kennels that were sold there and left along with Simon.

“So, are you going to keep the cat?” Simon asked. Grace nodded.

“Yeah, I think I will. She’s just so cute I can’t help it.” Grace justified. She looked at the tiny thing which had stopped meowing and now had her eyes open as the swelling had gone down. The kitten’s tan fur hit the sunlight and Grace could swear that it was bathed in gold.

“I guess it is pretty cute.” Simon said as he observed the same phenomenon. “Though, I think I'm more of a dog person. Cats are too flaky for my taste, dogs are loyal.” he asserted. Grace shook her head at his assessment of the difference between cats and dogs.

“I think she’s refined.” Grace said looking at the animal once more. “I’m going to call her Cleopatra.” Grace decided.

“A little on the nose in my opinion.” Simon joked. Grace rolled her eyes as if she was unaffected but changed her answer anyway.

“Fine, Cleo for short then.” she said. “A little less obvious?” she asked. Simon nodded.

“The subtlety has increased.” he said. The two made their way back to the park where Grace called Peirce to pick the two up. Grace continued to coo over her new pet and Simon continued to list reasons why he thought dogs were superior but ultimately did relent in the fact that he was glad the two had saved the tiny kitten. Eventually Peirce pulled up and dropped the two at Grace’s house where Simon’s parents were already waiting for him. The two exchanged goodbyes and Grace prepared to beg her parents to keep the cat.

“Grace, how was the park?” her mother asked her over dinner. Grace had managed to sneak Cleo into her room without any of the staff or her parents noticing but she knew that she wouldn’t be able to keep the cat a secret forever especially if she had to enact special procedures in order to raise a kitten that young.

“It was good. Actually, me and Simon found an abandoned kitten.” she explained. “We took it to the vet near here.” she added. Her father looked at her concerned.

“That’s pretty far Grace, next time tell us before you leave the area you say you're going to be at.” he said. Grace nodded and offered an apology.

“I’m sorry, I figured it was an emergency so I didn’t think to call.’ she explained. Her father waved her off.

“You don’t need to apologize, just be more careful next time, kids are getting kidnapped out there.” he explained. Grace nodded but mostly ignored this advice because in her opinion parents, but her’s in particular, were far to concerned about her getting taken.

“I will.” she explained. “Also, please don’t be mad, but I took her home with me and named her Cleo. Can we please keep her?” Grace begged. Her mother let out a deep and tired sigh.

“Where is the cat Grace?” she asked. Grace recognized that they hadn’t said no yet and considered it a good sign in terms of her chances of keeping Cleo.

“She’s in my bedroom. But she’s only three weeks old and her mother abandoned her because she was sick and if we don’t take care of her she’ll die.” Grace said, still trying to guilt trip her parents into allowing the cat she’d grown attached to to stay. “I got the medicine she needs from the doctor and he told me how to take care of her and everything so I promise i’ll do all the work.” she said, still begging. Her parents shared a look as they talked with their eyes trying to decide what to do. Finally her mother spoke.

“I suppose as long as you are responsible enough to care for it you can keep the cat.” she said. Grace wanted to jump up and down for joy at the news of getting to keep Cleo as a pet. Instead she said thank you a million times and finished dinner as fast as she could without choking so that she could go dote on her new pet. She fed the meowing kitten and gave her the antibiotic the doctor had prescribed. She pet and cooed over the little thing because she just couldn't help but adore small animals.

As Grace gently petted her kitten she wondered about what would have happened had she not saved her. Grace had mostly only said the stuff about the cat dying to be hyperbolic so that Simon would listen but maybe she was right. Or maybe someone else like her would have come along and taken the cat to safety on their own. Grace believed that for the most part people were good or at least tried to be. As she listened to the quiet little purr that Cleo emitted Grace decided that someone would have done it anyway.


	15. The Store

Grace was going to be thirteen and to her that was very important because that meant she was going to be a teenager. Grace had made many plans on what she would do as a teenager and the first of those plans began when she turned thirteen and so that meant she would have a lot of work to do in terms of getting things ready. Grace was explaining all of the Elisha on one mildly dreary february afternoon before the arrival of her birthday. Proudly, Grace displayed the detailed plan she’d curated in order to have the most picture perfect teenager years imaginable.

“As you can see,” Grace said proudly displaying her ornately decorated seven year plan which laid out milestones for each year. “I have planned out the perfect schedule to make sure that in the next seven years I do all of the most important teenage things.” she announced. Elisha chuckled at this as she read over some of the listed items.

“You’ve really got every movie cliche of all time on this list huh?” she asked. Grace ignored the hint of sarcasm in her friend’s voice and reaffirmed her commitment to achieving the goals that she’d laid out for her teenage years.

“If I follow what I wrote for this list I will have the most perfect experience ever and that all starts with a perfect thirteenth birthday party.” she said “It will be extravagant, magnificent, and another synonym I can’t think of right now.” she concluded. Elisha gave her an overall supportive but tired gaze and reassured her that her party would be great. Grace already knew that it would be because she’d planned it and Grace was very good at planning things to be perfect. This year to celebrate her time would be split into two. 

First dinner with her parents as always but, to celebrate her officially being a teenager her parents had rented out one of those huge ballrooms and she’d be having her official party there. Unlike previous years Grace had invited not just her dance group but her entire class as well. In her mind’s eye she had a picture of herself in a gorgeous dress descending some stairs to an adoring group of friends and peers as she rang in the beginning of the next stage of her life. She lived for it, the idea of that moment, of showing everyone a perfect version of herself.

And so to achieve that moment of true beauty and perfection Grace would first have to acquire the things that she needed and she needed a dress. Grace already had many nice dresses in her closet and anyone of them would work but her mother had insisted she get a new one for the party and Grace wasn’t going to say no to new clothes. What she would say no to however was shopping with her mother. Grace loved her mom very much and she of course knew her mom loved her. But shopping with her was absolutely exhausting and she refused to do it.

“Can’t you just drop me off at the mall and come get me when I’m done?” she begged. Her mother laughed at this.

“That is how kids get kidnapped Grace.” she said. Grace mumbled under her breath about being almost thirteen but knew better than to mention that complaint out loud lest she be treated to a speech about how many girls went missing every year and were never found. Rather, Grace went for a different approach in terms of making this particular shopping trip at the very least bearable. 

“Can I invite Simon along then?” she asked. Her mother looked at her curiously.

“I highly doubt he’d want to go dress shopping.” her mother said and Grace had to hold back laughter because her and Simon did everything together. Simon could ask if she wanted to go riffle through the trash and as long as her parents agreed she’d be over there. The feeling was mutual on his end as well but rather than say that she asked a different question.

“Can I call and check just in case?” she asked and her mother sighed and nodded so Grace called to see if Simon would want to join them dress shopping later that day and just as she knew he would Simon agreed. Grace was of the opinion that boring things were much more interesting when you brought along someone else so she had a habit of dragging Simon along on her most boring endeavors. Not that he ever seemed to mind of course.

“Where are we going again?” Simon asked as he climbed into the limo which had parked outside of his house. Grace’s mother chuckled.

“Why would you agree to come if you don’t even know where you’re going?” she asked. Simon shrugged.

“I wasn’t doing anything else.” he said casually. Simon was almost never doing anything from Grace’s perspective but she also had to consider the idea that he did do stuff but at the same time she did so it always seemed like he was free. Or maybe he was always free and she was his only friend. Grace hoped that it wasn’t the latter just for his own sake. 

“We’re going to the mall.” Grace told him and Simon nodded before opening a packet of nuts that were kept in a compartment of the limo. They rode and the two talked casually about how absolutely amazing her party was going to be paired with some casual teasing about how she was going to be a teenager meanwhile poor young Simon would still be a child. Grace didn’t actually care that Simon was about a month younger than her, but Simon did and so she teased him about it.

The three arrived at the mall and immediately shuffled to the luxury dress shop that Grace had been going to her entire life. This place would measure you and make alterations as well as selling dresses that were premade. Grace always just purchased the first thing she tried on so as to not prolong the experience but this time she’d already decided to actually put in effort for this special occasion. As they entered her mother exchanged words with the seamstress which didn’t interest her. She looked around the shop only to find herself laughing upon noticing Simon.

Clearly he’d never been in a shop like this before or at least not one of it’s scale. He stared in awe at the giant chandelier and the dresses with prices in the four digits and Grace laughed to herself because all of this was so normal to her she’d forgotten it was a thing people could be impressed by. That was one of the things she enjoyed most about her and Simon’s friendship, things that were foreign and interesting to one were mundane to the other. It’s an interesting feeling to see the things you don’t question through new eyes.

Simon sat in a chair as Grace was measured in the mirror for dress sizes and spoke casually about his feelings on the place that they now patronized.

“Do you shop here all of the time?” Simon asked. Grace shook her head.

“Only on special occasions.” she replied as her measurements were finished.

“How long does this usually take?” he asked. This time it was her mother to answer, not with a time frame but with an ominous warning.

“Your best friend is a perfectionist, get comfortable.” she said. Grace might have taken offense to that had it not been true. Of course she wanted this to be perfect, it was her birthday and she figured that this was a time in which her need to be perfect was at least understandable. After all, her entire class would be there if things went poorly which acted as a motivator to make sure that they didn’t. The woman brought out some dresses to choose from and she went into the dressing room to try them on.

After each one she’d step out of the dressing room and do a spin in front of the mirrors that were there and try to imagine herself in that moment under the lights in front of everyone who’s opinion mattered to her and she’d see if could see it clearly. If she couldn’t then that dress wasn’t the one. Her mother would sometimes make comments about a dress and try to give suggestions but she knew her daughter well enough to know that if it didn’t feel right whatever she said wouldn’t matter much.

Sometimes Grace would ask Simon what he thought but it was pretty obvious he wasn’t invested. Half of the time he was staring at the floor when giving his answer so Grace figured his advice wasn’t worth much of anything. Still even without his help Grace managed to find a dress that she wanted. She could close her eyes and picture it in her mind’s eye and it was perfect just as that moment should be. The dress was purchased and because the day was still young Simon decided to stay over for a while longer.

“This is my seven year plan.” Grace announced showing off the same elaborate list that she’d shown to Elisha the day before. The two sat in her bedroom as they often did when Simon came over, neither feeling particularly in the mood to go out on the balcony considering the weather. She handed the paper to Simon who read it over and chuckled.

“So your seven year plan is to live your life like a Disney channel movie?” he asked. Grace rolled her eyes.

“Elisha said the same thing and both of you are wrong. The plan is awesome and I stand by that.” she said stubbornly. Simon shrugged.

“I don’t see the point in trying to make things go the way you want. In my experience the more you try to make things happen in a certain way the more the universe will go out of it’s way to stop those things from happening.” he assessed. Grace ignored his rationalization in favor of teasing him for her own amusement.

“And how much experience do you have considering the fact that I’m almost a teenager and you’re not?” she questioned. Simon looked frustrated and embarrassed at that comment and muttered under his breath.

“How long do you plan to keep this up?” he asked. Grace laughed to herself.

“Only until you become a teenager too.” she said jokingly. Simon caught the fallacy and exposed it immediately.

“You’re not a teenagher yet though, which means we are still on equal footing.” he responded seriously as if he’d just won an ultimate game of wits. If Simon had truly been more adept in terms of wit he probably would have known that trying to win a logic game against Grace Monroe was about as pointless as trying to drain the ocean.

“Do you know how to waltz?” Grace asked. Simon was so caught off guard by the sudden change of subject that he completely forgot what he’d been talking about which was of course what she’d intended. Simon shook his head.

“No, why would I know that?” he asked, confused. Grace feigned surprise.

“You mean not everyone is taught a basic waltz in grade school?” she asked. The look Simon gave her indicated he wasn’t sure if she was joking and Grace clarified. “I’m messing with you.” she said before making an offer. “You want me to teach you?” she asked. Simon looked even more confused.

“Why?” he asked though based on the way the word curved up at the end and the redness in his ears Grace realized the question was asked out of nervousness rather than disinterest. She figured Simon probably didn’t want to embarrass himself in front of her which was something she related to. She did her best to reassure him.

“Well, my birthday is literally going to be in a ballroom, just for your own sake it’s probably best if you learn.” she explained. Simon still looked nervous and unconvinced. “It's easy I swear.” she promised. Finally Simon nodded and she explained the basic concept.

“I’ll lead, since you don’t know how, you just follow.” she explained. Grace started playing some music from her phone and she took one of his hands in her own and repeated the things she’d been told when learning this dance in one of her gym classes. “It’s forward, right, backward, left.” she said before demonstrating. Once again Simon didn’t look her in the eyes but at least this time he seemed to be paying attention to something more important than the floor. As the two moved around the room Simon quickly became proficient.

“You were right, it’s not that hard.” he said after getting more comfortable with the dance. He even managed to look her in the eye while telling her that. Grace gave him a smile and offered a suggestion.

“Do you want to lead?” she asked and at that moment all of the progress Simon had shown fell away as he tripped over his own feet and fell onto the floor. Grace helped him up and he looked sheepish. “I guess that answers that question.” she said to no one in particular.

“Sorry about falling over.” Simon said honestly. Grace waved his concern off.

“Don’t worry about it,” she said. “I wouldn’t have expected anything less from Simon ``left-feet`` Laurent.” she added jokingly. This seemed to put him in better spirits as he chuckled at her comment. 

“I guess some people just aren’t meant to dance.” he offered. Grace shook her head at this.

“Anyone can dance and that includes you. All you need is a little motivator so to give you that, you can dance with me at the party.” she said. Simon shook his head furiously.

“There's no way I’m doing that,” he said seriously. Grace gave him a sly look.

“That goes against the rules of birthdays, you’ve got to do what the birthday girl says.” she explained and Simon sighed because he’d finally remembered the pointlessness of trying to argue with Grace Monroe gave up because he was going to do itv whether he liked it or not. Grace smiled once she saw that fact had sunk in. “See, now you’ve got a motivator to learn.” she announced. Simon rolled his eyes.

“And as your gift I’m going to spend an hour talking to everyone at the party of how you helped me create the Esmoroth trilogy to motivate you to never cross me again.” he explained. Grace laughed.

“That is why security will be waiting to toss you out the moment you try to open your mouth.” she shot back. Simon was quick with a retort.

“I’m a skinny kid, I’ll just climb in through the window and continue with my tales of magic and intrigue.” he threatened. Grace wanted to respond but couldn’t help but laugh and Simon let out an excited exclamation. “Ha! You broke, I win.” he said having been the one to last longer. Grace’s laughter subsided and she affirmed Simon’s victory.

“Yeah yeah, you win.”


	16. The Club

Simon Laurent didn’t have friends. He had one friend, singular, and that was Grace Monroe. And Grace was such a kind, funny, perfect friend that oftentimes Simon didn’t even notice that he only had one friend and when he did notice he didn’t particularly care. And even if Grace was his only friend he still had acquaintances. He wasn’t picked last for group projects and no one shoved him into lockers. Mostly people ignored him and Simon was completely fine with that arrangement. Simon never begrudged his lack of friends.

Or at least he didn’t usually. Grace was of course an amazing friend who he adored but the issue with only having one friend was of course the proximity to having no friends. If you had one friend and you got into a fight you had absolutely no one to talk to. While that had never happened to Simon because him and Grace never fought the fact that it could happen made him anxious. And of course if your one friend had other friends they couldn’t always be available. 

That was Simon’s main problem. Grace was very interesting in that she was friends with everyone and also very few people. Grace could make friends with just about anyone and just about every time Simon talked to her she’d casually reference someone who he’d never heard of and Simon would be reminded that she did indeed have a life outside of him and that was strange. But maybe the moment that had kicked started Simon re-examining his lack of other friends had been at Grace’s thirteenth birthday party a little over a month ago.

Simon could remember showing up to that room full of people who he didn’t know and watching Grace enter the room. He remembered how everyone had turned and looked at her including him because she demanded their attention without saying a word. And that had all been normal. It was just that when she entered Grace talked to everyone in the room. She had names memorized and inside jokes that made people laugh, Grace existed in tons of other worlds. And Simon wasn’t a part of any of them.

And that was fine, of course it was fine. He wasn’t going to be upset because Grace was a social butterfly, he was going to have a good time and he had up to a point. And then Grace had dragged him onto the dance floor while muttering something about it being her birthday and she’d made him dance with her. Simon wished that he’d hated it. He wished that he’d messed up so that the two could laugh it off and then he’d go back to enjoying the party and nothing would have changed. But things can’t be simple.

So the two had danced and Simon had loved it because even though he’d never admit it he was upset that Grace had been hanging out with tons of other people all night and while the song was playing it was just the two of them. While the song was playing he didn’t have to be reminded that Grace had other friends and other jokes and that he wasn’t all she had. And then the song ended, and Grace walked off to talk to someone else and Simon remembered that he hated parties and that it wasn’t his birthday and that this wasn’t about him.

So he went home. And since that night Simon had been determined to make other friends because fundamentally he understood that the pain he felt over not being Grace’s only friend was his own fault. He wouldn’t feel upset if he had other friends and it wasn’t healthy to attach yourself to one person and so Simon knew that he needed other friends. The only issue was he had no clue how he was going to make them. Simon’s main draw was anonymity and that didn’t exactly make him adept at finding friends. 

Simon was an introvert and he happened to have been chosen as a friend by the world’s best extrovert, but she’d never managed to rub off on him. Simon had been friends with Grace for three years and it still managed to surprise and confuse him that she’d just walked up to him and started to talking. The idea of doing that made Simon’s skin break out in hives at the idea. Of course, Simon always found his comforts in books and research but Simon wasn’t sure if there were books about friendship nor was he desperate enough to read them if there were.

And of course it wasn’t like he could just ask Grace how to make friends because one that was incredibly sad and two then she’d know that she was his only friend and his pride wouldn’t let him admit it. So being Simon he’d have to come up with another plan, one that was so incredibly stupid and convoluted that any normal person would have never come up with it. Simon decided to join a club at his school. This plan had a few benefits, the first being that anyone who was in the club would share common interests.

The second was tied to the premise of the club and that was for it to be primarily dedicated to robotics and tech. This was great because Simon had created some truly impressive things with his gathered parts and borrowed library books but as his passion had grown so too had his need for more resources, and guidance. If he joined this club there would be teachers who knew all about this stuff and could help him. Of course the only issue would be that Simon would have to try and talk to people which he didn’t usually do.

But that hurdle could be overcome, it would have to be overcome. The truth was a part of him really did fear the idea of Grace having so many other options in terms of friendship. It would be easy for her to decide she didn’t want to be friends anymore and to never talk to him again. Simon figured she’d probably forget about him in a week. And of course he was sure that she would simply leave him but she could and he couldn’t. He needed her more than she needed him.

And these were all of the thoughts that raced through Simon’s head as he slid into the back of the classroom where the meeting was being held doing his best to not be noticed. He hid in the back of the room and faced an internal dilemma because he at the same time didn’t want to be seen but desperately wanted an extrovert to approach him and designate him as a friend like Grace had done. Simon wanted the rewards of friendship but had no desire to put in the effort. So he sat in the classroom conflicted.

Perhaps that was the true failure of humanity in regards to companionship. The want to be seen and cared for weighed against the ideal of being seen for who you were. Maybe that was why animals were kept as companions. He never had to worry about being truly seen by Archduke Franz Ferdinand and he was still loved regardless. Perhaps he had made the world’s best case for not having friends. Or, more likely, he was just jealous Grace had so many and he was trying to convince himself he was okay with not having any.

He looked around the room, unnoticed and stood up grabbing his bag with the intention of leaving. As he did one of his projects fell from his bag. The fall wasn’t too far, the machine was fine luckily but it was enough to make everyone stare at him. Simon wasn’t self-conscious at all, he stayed unseen by choice, but he had no qualms about being in front of a group of people, after all, he was proud of how embarrassing he could be. That fact didn’t make the uncomfortable tension any less uncomfortable. 

“Um, hi.” was all Simon could muster as he picked the small whirring wheeled machine from the ground and went to put it in his bag. 

“Are you a new member?” the teacher leading the club asked and Simon thought for a long moment about how he was going to answer that question. He could of course leave but the entire purpose of leaving was to have a clean exit. Now that it was clear that wasn’t happening it likely would have been more productive to just stay and join.

“Yeah.” he said and the teacher gestured him over to explain the workings of the club and what not. She asked if Simon had any experience in tech and as a response he showed off what he made. It wasn’t much to Simon. Just a small whirring motor on wheels. It didn’t even have a remote, he just turned it on and placed it down watching it go wherever it pleased. He had plans to make things that were so much bigger and more amazing in the future that to him it was practically laughable.

“You made this on your own?” the teacher asked when examining the thing she’d just been handed. Simon nodded and gave a qualifier.

“Well, I did get help from books and the internet, but I put it together and got all the parts if that’s what you mean.” he explained. The teacher looked massively impressed which caught him off guard but filled him with pride nonetheless. 

“You’ve got some real skill in terms of this stuff, this is a highschool level project.” she affirmed and Simon could practically feel his confidence increasing. The teacher advised him to use the unique resources the school had, which of course weren’t many. Simon could tell by the way she spoke about the club and from the resources that they had that this club was likely her passion project, and paid for out of pocket. The school would never shell out the cash needed for this, if they even had it to begin with.

After receiving his project back Simon walked over to a group of kids seemingly working on something together. Awkwardly he stood near them until one looked up and spoke to him. His name was Andrew and like the teacher and everyone else he was deeply impressed by Simon. Impressive was not a word he generally used to describe himself, the things he was good at also just so happened to be things that no one cared about. But maybe that was the point of spaces like this, a room full of people who cared.

The group welcomed him over to help with their project and he casually slotted right in, explaining how he’d made what he made and the resources he’d used. They hung off his every word as if he was constantly sharing gems of information that would change the course of technological history. Capturing everyone’s attention with a single word felt amazing, and powerful. He wondered if this was the way Grace felt all of the time and suddenly he understood her drive to be perfect a little better.

Simon wasn’t actually all that impressive or amazing and if they ever found out he was a fraud he’d never get this feeling again. So he had to make sure no one ever knew. He figured that was something similar to Grace’s thought process. Of course to him the only difference was Grace was really as amazing as she projected and he wasn’t. But for now that didn’t matter because he had friends and even if the pretense was false he’d make sure that he kept having them.

The club had ended and Simon had exchanged phone numbers with the group he’d talked to, being careful to hide the fact that he had a flip phone for fear of the no doubt endless taunting he’d receive. That had been a lesson he’d learned from telling Grace, though he was always more okay with her doing it because they went back and forth with each other. He left the club room and walked out to the minivan that his mother and father shared climbing into the front seat. He was greeted by his father who’d picked him up.

Simon was still a bit unused to having his father around, maybe he didn’t trust it yet. He was sure that eventually he’d forget that he was ever gone but in terms of when that would happen he wasn’t sure. 

“How was the club?” his father asked and Simon gave a response quickly.

“It was good, I made some acquaintances.” he responded. Simon didn’t talk to his parents about the projects he worked on. He felt it would be more productive to tell them when he’d truly made something useful, something that would keep them from having to worry. And, as impressive as it was to his peers and teacher, a motor on wheels wasn’t anything that would keep them from having to worry. Upon arriving home Simon rushed to his room to make adjustments to his next project, and to call Grace.

Simon’s parents had explained to him the concept of limits when they’d gifted him the phone upon his birthday about a week ago and after having it explained to him Simon quickly set out to make a plan about when and how he’d use the phone so as to not go over his allotted limit and cost them extra money. He’d factored in parental phone calls and emergencies and the like and had concluded he could afford himself three personal calls a month. A small amount no doubt but he could still use the home phone.

Personal calls were to be used only when out of the house and to talk about stuff he wouldn’t want to say in front of his parents. After all, he did sometimes use less than above board language when joking around with Grace. This of course meant that it currently was not acceptable to use a personal call and he sighed grabbing the home phone which he’d found could be used in his room without cutting out so long as he stood in a very specific spot near the door.

Upon her picking up Simon recounted to Grace the story of joining the tech club and being essentially the most qualified person there in terms of skill. He did over exaggerate the reactions of his peers a bit but he didn’t think it was too big a deal if it added to the atmosphere. After finishing the story Grace gave her take.

“Hmmm,” she said and Simon was about to ask her what that meant when she added something else. “That sounds great, just don’t let it go to your head.” she teased. Simon didn’t know whether to laugh or to be offended that her only take on his success was that he’d become prideful from it. He elected to laugh it off and think about it later.

“Sounds like someone’s worried that I’m coming for her crown of being the best at everything.” he said. Grace playfully scoffed on the other line.

“In your dreams Laurent, there can only be one and I am she.” Grace explained. They went back and forth like that for a while when Simon got a call on his phone from a number he recognized as another member of the club.

“I’ve got to go, I've got another call.” he explained. Grace gave him a goodbye and he hung up in favor of the other call. Being the one to end the conversation to take another call was weird. It almost felt like he was lying because he’d never done it before. He answered the call and talked to Andrew about the project he was working on. Taking a phone call from someone other than Grace was weird. He made a joke and Andrew laughed at it and Simon decided that it was good weird.


	17. The Couch

Grace was thirteen and from a practical standpoint nothing had really changed. She looked the same, she felt the same, and mostly she acted the same. But even if it hadn’t been stated something important had changed for Grace when the year had changed and that was a certain privilege she was gaining. Since she’d gotten a phone she’d begged her parents to allow her to download some form of social media and of course they’d denied her. But now, she was thirteen and as per their agreement she could download Instagram.

To celebrate the occasion Grace had done what she always did when she felt something needed to be celebrated and invited Simon over. “Why exactly do I need to be over at your house at,” Simon paused, likely looking at the clock in his room. “Ten in the morning to watch you press download on an app?” he questioned. Grace rolled her eyes over the phone despite the fact that she knew he wouldn’t be able to appreciate the gesture.

“It’s not just downloading an app Simon,” she began. “It’s all a part of my plan.” she said smugly and she could hear Simon groan at the mention of such plans.

“Right, please recount to me Grace’s glorious plan once again.” he said sarcastically. Unfortunately for Simon and fortunately for Grace she didn’t care about his sarcasm and would take any opportunity to talk about her plan.

“I’m going to grow a huge social media following so that by the time I’m seventeen I’m a huge influencer who is shaping trends.” she said proudly and she could hear Simon groan out of annoyance again. “Anyway, come over so you can be a part of this life changing event. If you're lucky maybe I’ll even make you my first post.” she offered.

“No thanks, I think I’m not too cut out for social media and I’d much prefer to go back to bed and not indulge you.” he said trying to sound more mature than he actually came off. Grace chuckled at his failed attempt to sound like anything other than a tired middle schooler and she hung up because she knew he’d be over in about thirty minutes. That meant she had to get ready because at the moment she was still in her pajamas. Of course, what Grace wanted to do was get completely dressed up and ready but that wouldn’t work on Simon.

If she opened the door and was completely and totally ready for a fashion shoot Simon would call her out on having spent the last thirty minutes getting ready even though he was coming over and he’d ask her why she always felt the need to look amazing and she wouldn’t have an answer. So instead she would simply put on her good pajamas and do her hair but in a way that still gave her plausible deniability so on the off chance that Simon did give her crap for getting ready on his account she could simply say that he was imagining things.

Grace finished her routine and went to open the door. Predictably she was greeted by her best friend who was doing his best to look pissed and annoyed that she’d forced him to come over on a Saturday when he’d rather be sleeping something that was obviously undercut by the fact that he’d chosen to come over on his own accord. He opened his mouth, likely to comment on her appearance but having learned better he closed it again and shuffled inside.

“Thank you for joining me on this brave new adventure.” Grace said with a level of fake happiness in her voice. Simon ignored her kicking off his shoes and flopping onto the living room couch.

“Yeah yeah, let’s just get this over with.” he mumbled. Grace sat down next to him casually.

“Nice to know you’ve still got that famous Simon Laurent enthusiasm.” she joked. “Now let’s see.” she muttered to herself as she navigated the app store in order to download what, to Grace, was going to be the beginning of the rest of her life. After filling out some of the more basic information she was presented with the option of choosing her username. “What should I be called?” she asked Simon who was still laying face down on the couch pretending to sleep.

“How about Grace.” he offered uninterested and as a response she shook him and gave him a frustrated look when he finally looked up.

“Simon, this is serious, this name will define how I am seen for the rest of my social media experience.” she said annoyed at his lack of helpfulness. Simon smiled at the fact that he’d managed to annoy her.

“I am being serious, that is my serious answer because this is clearly something that matters a lot to me and is very important.” he said sarcastically once again. Grace gave him an annoyed look before pushing him onto the floor.

“Grace, what was that?” her father called from the other room upon hearing Simon meet the ground.

“Simon just tripped and fell.” she said and he didn’t ask anymore questions. She looked at her friend smugly as he tried to look as intimidating as he could while lying on the floor which wasn’t very intimidating at all it turned out.

“What the hell?” he questioned and Grace gave him an innocent look.

“Only people who are helpful get to sit on the couch.” she said stretching her legs across the entire sofa so as not to allow him to get back on. Simon grumbled but ultimately accepted his fate settling into sitting on the floor. “Now, I have to pick an actual name no thanks to you.” she said. Grace ultimately settled on a name and then moved onto the other important things in regards to creating a good social media presence. First, she needed an engaging bio, something that would sum her up but also draw people in. And, she needed a good first photo.

“I have a suggestion.” Simon offered and Grace looked at him, untrusting of his offer.

“Do you have a real suggestion or do you just want to get back on the couch?” she asked.

“I have a real suggestion for your bio.” he reaffirmed and Grace let him back onto the couch so that he could share it. “How about you just list your never ending accomplishments.” he offered and though it was presented slightly sarcastically it was still a real suggestion so Grace allowed him to stay on the couch.

“A solid idea but a bit over done in my opinion.” Grace expressed. “How about something more lighthearted.” she said to herself before typing up a bio that she felt best fit the tone she was attempting to convey with the account. Finally Grace only had one thing left to do in terms of getting her account prepared to rocket her into stardom. She had considered for a long time what the first thing she’d post on social media would be, as it was the thing people would look back on when she was famous to see how far she’d come.

She’d decided that a picture of herself was the only real way that she could start off the account and as such set out to take a photo of herself worthy of social media. Simon raised an eyebrow at her as she tested different angles but didn't take a picture instead simply looking at herself in the camera rather than attempting any pictures for real.

“What are you doing?” Simon asked.

“I’m testing out different angles before I take any photos, obviously.” she said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

“And why are you doing that?” he asked as Grace continued to not take any pictures.

“Simon,” she began. “The first picture you post on social media has to be amazing, defining, and most importantly effortless.” she explained.

“Looks like a lot of effort to me.” he said to no one in particular. Grace responded anyway.

“What I mean by effortless is that it’s got to be a one and done, I can only take one picture so that picture has got to be perfect.” she asserted. Simon still looked unconvinced at her statements on the laws of social media.

“Right, and did you make up all of these rules or was there some meeting you went to?” he asked and once again Grace ignored his comments in favor of trying to capture the perfect image of herself that would define her entrance into the world of social media. After what seemed like years Grace finally worked up the courage taking the picture and looking over at it. She hated it. Her first thought was of course to take another but that would defeat the purpose of being effortless so that was off the table. Simon looked over her shoulder at the photo.

“It’s fine, it's a good picture of you.” he offered though Grace of course ignored him.

“Simon being good isn’t enough, this is about putting your best foot forward, presenting the best version of yourself and this isn’t anywhere near that.” she expressed seriously. Frustrated she applied the built in filters in the hopes that they would clear away in imperfections she saw but unfortunately they remained prominent to her eye regardless. She put her phone down and sat on the couch annoyed that she’d already failed the goal she’d set out for herself in terms of social media perfection.

How could she ever hope to reach the heights of influencing the trends of the day when she couldn't even manage to take a picture of herself that met the standards she felt it should. Maybe she was truly hopeless, doomed to toss away her plan and become the thing Grace Monroe feared possibly more than anything, being unremarkable. She was so deep into this thought about being unremarkable that she didn’t even notice when Simon picked up her phone and snapped a photo of her.

“Here,” he said, handing her the phone back. “Now you don’t have to worry about having a good first photo because I took care of it for you.” he said. Grace looked at the app to see that Simon had indeed posted the picture. She wasn’t sure what she was going to do, though killing Simon was quickly climbing to the top of her list. At least it would have been if the picture wasn’t actually kind of nice. Unlike the photo she’d taken of herself which she hated more with each passing second as more and more imperfections jumped out at her, the imperfections in Simon’s photo of her added character.

“How did you manage to take such a nice photo of me?” she asked curiously. Simon shrugged.

“All photos of you are nice photos Grace,” he began. “You just like to hold yourself to standards you don’t have for anybody else.” he said. “When you do something it has to be perfect and if it’s not you hate it because you think it should be. But when someone else does something you can see it for what it is.” he assessed. Grace never thought of her need for perfection as something that kept her from seeing things as they were. To her this need only sharpened her critical eye, but maybe Simon was right.

The photo got a like and Grace was happy to note that it wasn’t from a robot, something that boosted her confidence significantly. She thought about the fact that Simon was right that she expected perfection from herself and nobody else. Maybe she should start being easier on herself, or maybe she needed to start expecting more from others, she wasn’t sure yet. In any case Simon had managed to take a nice casual looking photo of her that would no doubt be looked back on with fondness as fans of the future saw how far she’d come.

“As thanks for helping me get my account up and running, even if you were sarcastic about it,” Grace began. “I will give you the highest honor possible of being featured on my account.” she said, taking a picture of him. Simon tried to look serious.

“Grace, don’t post that I look awful.” he said. Grace shook her head and continued looking at the photo.

“I’m sorry but you taught me that not everything needs to be perfect,” she began before jokingly putting a hand on his shoulder. “It's time for you to take your own advice.” she said through laughter as she uploaded the photo.

“Grace I’m serious, take that down.” he practically begged and Grace gave him an earnest look.

“Do you really want me to take it down?” she asked honestly. Simon thought for a moment and tried to determine how serious he was about Grace taking the picture down. Ultimately he decided that he wasn’t serious at all and waved off her concern over him.

“I’m just joking, you can keep the picture up.” he said and Grace smiled giving his arm a playful punch.

“Good, because I’m not going to be the only one looking ugly on the internet, we’re in this one together.” she said and Simon laughed in agreement because the two of them were always together in failure and success. Grace had known that Simon would come over despite his protests because he was always there for her when she wanted him to be and the same went for her. Simon was Grace’s best friend not because she’d known him the longest or because they had the most in common, it was because Grace never doubted that he’d be there for her.

Maybe that was the crux of a good friendship, the belief that the other person would always be there for you even if from a logical standpoint there was no way to guarantee that. Friendship wasn’t logical, or at least it wasn’t anymore logical than Grace’s need for perfection. It was personal, internal, emotional. It was the decision to make someone who you have no obligation to, and who has no obligation to you, a fixture in your life. Grace scolded through the pages of people who were older, or more successful or famous and wondered if they felt that way about their friends.

Grace wanted to be perfect but what was friendship to a perfect person but a transaction of favors. Grace looked at the friendship she had with Simon and saw far more than a transaction of favors, she saw a real true bond that she’d chosen to make because that was what she’d wanted. Grace felt the need to be perfect in front of everyone including Simon but besides her parents he was the only one who’d take notice and tell her she didn’t need to. Perfection was a wall that Grace put up and she wouldn’t let anyone knock it down.

But as her best friend, she’d let him look over it sometimes.


	18. The Beach

Grace Monroe had been swimming since she was very young. Due to an incident in a pool when he was a child her father had insisted that she learn to swim for her own safety and so she had. There were pictures of Grace as a toddler at swim classes, something that she had no memory of. All Grace knew was that as far back as she could think, she’d known how to swim. Grace enjoyed swimming because she understood it in the same way she understood dance. While ballet spoke to her in a way nothing else could, swimming spoke the same language.

It was about percussion, timing, flowing movements that strung into each other. It was only when she’d been able to apply those lessons to the violin that she’d understood it and likewise it was through that lens that she enjoyed swimming. The feeling of being in the water, of traversing it while managing your breathing and air intake the same way she counted time while dancing was absolutely freeing. Grace was of course contemplating the nature of swimming with it’s ethereal feeling of freedom because it was the hottest day of the year.

As she remembered the lovely feeling of being submerged in cool water and feeling like she was flying she also peeled her legs off of the leather couch as they had become bonded and moved Cleo away from her as she was a living heater. Grace grabbed for the cup of water next to her only to find that it was empty and she weighed the pros and cons of getting up to grab another one. It wasn’t dangerously hot however, just hot enough to make everyone uncomfortable and for the AC to never feel quite high enough. Of course if she could manage to drag herself out to the backyard she could swim in the pool; but in this weather that might as well have been miles.

So Grace groaned and settled for getting a glass of water from the fridge as she shuffled her way tiredly to the kitchen. Grabbing a glass from the cabinet she waited what felt like an eternity for the cup to be filled and drank it quickly. She began to fill the cup again but was greeted by her mother entering the kitchen.

“Get ready, we are going to the beach with the Laurent's in an hour.” she said casually. Grace groaned the idea of having to go somewhere in the overpowering heat.

“Why didn’t you tell me early?” she complained, feeling as though some warning would have allowed her to mentally prepare herself to go some place.

“If I had told you earlier you would have complained up until we went, now you only have an hour to complain.” she pointed out and Grace scowled because her mother was right and then immediately stopped scowling so as to avoid the dreaded “fix your face” that would come afterwards. She finished her glass of water and put the cup in the sink before walking upstairs to get ready for the beach. Of course, Grace had fantasized about being able to swim off this heat, and she was excited for that, but to get to the beach it would be one long sweaty car ride.

Grace shuddered at the idea of the two families packed into the limousine before remembering that it likely wouldn’t be the case and calming down again. And besides, the beach would still be fun despite how awful it would be to get there. Grace wondered if Simon knew how to swim and figured he did because everyone she knew had been taught how to swim. As she imagined the feeling of swimming, of floating, Grace was able to reconcile the annoyance she had with having to ride in the car. She put her bathing suit on under her clothes and grabbed a beach towel.

Meeting up with her parents in the living room she watched as her father packed a cooler full of sandwiches. Grace had long ago given up trying to understand why he insisted on doing this when they always ended up getting food on the boardwalk anyway, concluding it was just one of those adult things that she’d understand when she got older. They climbed into the car after stowing their items in the truck and as Peirce started them on their way Grace asked a question to her parents.

“Why did you decide to go to the beach today?” she asked and her mother shrugged.

“It’s hot outside. I figured we could all use some beach time.” her mother explained and Grace raised an eyebrow.

“Every time we go to the beach you never swim, you just lay in the sand. Aren’t you going to just get hotter?” she questioned and her mother waved her off once again.

“You know I hate swimming.” she said and Grace looked utterly confused.

“Then what is the point of going to the beach for you, what do you get out of the experience?” she asked and her father chuckled at his daughter’s utterly bewilderment at her mother’s statement’s.

“You’ll get it when you're older.” he said and Grace frowned mentally adding it to her list of things that she’d have to wait until she was older until she understood. In all truth Grace felt old enough to understand most things but she was constantly being told that she wasn’t and it was the most annoying thing in the world to her. She was thirteen after all, a teenager. And yet her parents constantly acted as though they were in on some joke she didn’t understand. As they drove Grace took out her phone and took a picture of the landscape that she saw.

She stared at the photo for a while trying to determine what to caption it before deciding on entitling it “beach day” and posting it on her platforms. While she was of course no where near the influencer status that she so desperately craved Grace had grown a small but loyal group of fans who’d like her posts and left comments. Simon had asked her why she thought these people had gravitated towards her and Grace had said the reason was “because she was awesome”. She did however see one other reason why she’d amassed any fans at all at such a young age.

Most of the fans that she had were her own age and shared her gender and race. On social media Grace was everything she wanted to be, everything that everyone wanted to be, perfect. She had the best food, the nicest clothes, the biggest room. Grace danced in gigantic concert halls for adoring crowds (mostly made of parents but still) she played the violin and constantly hung out with her friends and went on lavish vacations. Grace understood that her existence was wish fulfilment.

She lived the life that a lot of these people dreamed of, not to mention the fact that it was a curated collection of her at her most perfect. So while she may not have reached mainstream heights yet Grace was content with her small and loyal fanbase for now. She felt as though she was doing a service to herself by sharing this content, it gave her something to strive for. The Grace Monroe on social media was perfect, she never had an off day, or a boring minute. That was the version of herself that she could be, that she should be.

As they arrived at the beach Grace’s father gathered their things from the trunk and the Monroe’s found a spot on the beach to set up their items. As Grace was getting settled laying her towel out on the beach she was greeted by Simon who walked up to her.

“It’s hot as hell.” was the first thing Simon greeted her with upon the two meeting up and Grace narrowed her eyebrows at him.

“First of all, open with; hi Grace nice to see you, next time. Second of all, hell is exactly where you are going to go if your parents catch you swearing.” she said smugly and Simon laughed.

“Hell isn’t a swear, they’re allowed to say it on the radio.” he responded giving his justification and Grace raised an objection.

“If it’s not a swear then go say it in front of your parents.” she said smugly and Simon, perhaps using his self preservation instincts elected not to do that. “That’s what I thought.” she said before taking her phone from her bag and snapping a picture of him. Simon looked embarrassed.

“Do you have to take a picture of everything that happens?” he asked and Grace smiled.

“Sounds like someone is jealous that his phone doesn’t have a camera.” she teased and upon noticing Simon’s unamused look she softened a bit. “I’ll put the phone away, I just wanted to commemorate this day.” she explained before doing just that.

“Thank you.” Simon said as he looked over at the beach and it’s wide open areas for them to run around. Grace survived the area alongside him before getting distracted by something else.

“Your hair got longer again.” she mused and Simon looked a bit caught off guard before nodding.

“Oh, yeah it does that.” He mumbled and Grace laughed.

“Of course I know it does that, it’s just that it’s probably long enough for me to braid now.” she said excitedly and Simon responded to her enthusiasm with weariness.

“Maybe another time.” he said though it came out more like begging as the both of them knew that if Grace were to get her hands on braidable hair Simon would be forced to sit still for however long it took. Attempting to avoid that fate Simon made another suggestion. “I’ll race you to the water.” he said and before Grace could respond he took off running in that direction. Grace, never one to be out done raced after him, the idea of braiding his hair all but forgotten. “I beat you!” Simon cheered and Grace stuck out her tongue.

“You only won because I let you win.” she said half joking half serious.” before changing the subject. “Let’s get really far out into the water.” she said excitedly and Grace attempted to enter the water before squealing and jumping back because of how cold it was. Simon didn’t bother to hold back his laughter.

“You're such a dork, you couldn’t even handle getting in the water!” he laughed and Grace was embarrassed for only a second before getting a devious look on her face and dragging him out into the water alongside her while laughing. As Simon made contact with the water he let out a high pitched squeal as well though he was far more embarrassed about it then Grace was. As the two made their way into the deeper water Grace let go of Simon’s hand as she began to swim out further. It was only as she realized she hadn’t heard Simon in a while that Grace remembered she hadn’t asked him if he could swim.

Turning back around she saw that Simon wasn’t behind her and despite her better judgement she started to panic. After all, Simon was always so concerned about impressing her that it made sense he might not tell her he couldn’t swim until it was too late. He might be in danger right now and it was all her fault. Grace panicked and scanned the ocean for any sign of her friend finally catching sight of him with his head barely bobbing above the water. Grabbing onto him Grace dragged him to shore as she tried to hold back tears.

When they finally returned to land Grace considered running over to an adult but decided against it in her panicked state figuring that she might not have enough time. Trying to remember the rhythm she’d been taught when being shown CPR by a teacher Grace held back tears as she pressed on his chest and silently prayed. “Come on Simon please wake up; please don’t be dead.” she said to no one. Finally she felt him moving and Simon spoke in a soft voice, barely a whisper.

“I got you.” he said and suddenly all of Grace sadness and worry turned to absolute fury as her mind ran through all of the ways she could murder Simon Laurent for scaring her so much. She settled instead for mentally screaming all of the cuss words that she knew and giving him a death glare as he started laughing over what a funny prank that he’d pulled.

“You are the worst best friend ever Simon, you are such an asshole and I hate you!” she practically screamed. She considered grabbing him and dragging him into the shallow tide so that she could drown him herself but the look of remorse on his face almost made her reconsider. She was still thinking about doing it, but she was less sure that she’d actually go through with it.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t want to actually make you mad.” he said honestly. “I thought it would be funny, I saw it in a movie.” he attempted to explain while Grace still looked like she was deciding between committing a murder and not talking to him for the rest of the day. The mention of a movie did however make Grace realize that she knew what he was referring to.

“I know that movie, the one where the guy pretends to drown so that he can get a kiss from the lifeguard.” she said and the idea that Simon’s plan had been inspired by that wasn’t doing him any favors in terms of making her not angry. Simon frantically waved his arms before clarifying.

“I wasn’t doing it to get a kiss I swear, that’s not even how you do CPR anymore so I promise that it wasn’t anything like that!” he tried to explain. Grace looked skeptical but she couldn’t help herself and she laughed at Simon’s desperate attempt to not look awful. Simon looked surprised as she started laughing but went along with it, likely realizing it was better than her wanting to drown him. Simon did look like a complete dork with his mess of soaking wet hair stuck to his face as he desperately tried to regain her favor.

“Okay, I forgive you I guess. But if you ever scare me like that again I’ll kill you for real and make sure that it looks like an accident. And by the way, you’ll never get a kiss from me.” she explained. Simon looked embarrassed but nodded seemingly agreeing to these terms. The two went off to build competing sandcastles while casually exchanging words with each other when Simon changed the topic of conversation completely.

“Did you mean it when you said I was the worst best friend ever?” he asked and Grace shook her head.

“No, I was just upset; I didn’t mean it.” she responded. “But I did mean it when I said that you’re never getting a kiss from me.” she said slyly while laughing and Simon blushed bright red and looked away.

“I didn’t want one.” he said slightly flustered and Grace laughed again.

“Good, because I’m way out of your league.” she responded before changing the subject. “Do you know how to float?” she asked and Simon shook his head. “Let me show you.” she said and the two went out into the water again. “Lie on your back and I’ll hold you up.” she said. Simon looked skeptical.

“Are you going to try and drown me?” he asked and Grace assured him that she wouldn’t. As she held Simon up above the water he shut his eyes tight and Grace did think about dunking his head in the water as payback. Instead she slowly removed her hands and watched him. His eyes were held slightly less tight and his chest rose and fell as he breathed in and out. Grace watched her best friend and she felt a sense of calm wash over her. She wasn’t quite sure why she did it, but Grace stood there and watched him float.


	19. The Hill

Grace was pretty. Simon didn’t know why he hadn’t noticed it before but he’d noticed it now and he couldn’t stop noticing. Grace was pretty, really pretty. Simon tried to think of when that fact had come to his attention and he narrowed it down to two separate incidents. The first had come when he and Grace had gone to the beach together. That day wasn’t anything out of the ordinary on the surface, it was just that long after the day had ended when Simon had crawled into bed he couldn’t stop thinking about what Grace had said.

The words “You’re never getting a kiss from me.” echoed in his head no matter how hard he tried to ignore them. Simon had laid in bed staring at the ceiling hearing those words over and over again. He wondered if Grace had meant it when she said that he’d never get a kiss from her. She said that she had meant it and Grace was not one to be known to break her promises. Still, never was a long time, how could she be so sure that there would never come a time where the two would kiss.

Simon let out a groan of annoyance as he realized that he didn’t want to be thinking about this and he wasn’t sure why he was. Why did he care if Grace would never give him a kiss, it wasn’t like he wanted to kiss her. Despite his own thoughts his heart increased it’s beating nonetheless at the idea of kissing Grace. Simon supposed that this was normal, after all, Grace was a girl and he was a guy and all media he’d ever consumed told him that was all it took. Besides Grace was Grace, anyone would be weird if they didn’t want to kiss her.

So that had been Simon’s first indication that Grace was pretty, because he was a guy and guys liked pretty girls and therefore Grace was pretty. Of course, that was mostly just the recognition of the abstract concept that Grace was attractive. The second incident had been the one that had brought it into focus. About two days after thoughts of kissing Grace had kept him up all night Simon had been in robotics club alongside his friends. They were as always doing more talking then working and the subject of cameras had come up.

“My phone is pretty primitive, but I did figure out how to hook a camera up to it.” he’d said casually.

“Did you figure out how to upload any pictures?” Andrew asked him.

“Yeah, but they’re pretty low resolution on the phone itself, I could probably show you better if I hooked the phone up to a laptop.” he said and with the encouragement of his friends he’d done that. Flipping through the photos that had been taken on the laptop he’d been stopped when one particular picture had come up.

“Who’s that?” Andrew had asked and Simon, who hadn’t been paying too much attention to the photos much more interested in showing off the tech, looked at what he was referring to. The photo was one of Grace in her ballet outfit right after a performance.

“That’s Grace, I've told you all about her before.” Simon said casually. He was surprised at what was said next, bothe because of it’s content and because of his reaction to said content.

“You didn’t tell us she was hot.” Corey, another member of their group said as he stared at her photo and Simon felt his face grow warm. Andrea, the only female member of the friend group rolled her eyes at his comment but complemented Grace as well.

“She is really pretty.” Andrea mentioned and Simon looked at the photo again. He didn’t know why it felt so strange to hear these things said about his best friend. Maybe it was just because Grace always looked the way she did in the photo. Well, she wasn’t always in her dance attire of course but she did always look similar to this. It was just how Grace looked. Simon stared at the photo as the conversation switched topics and tried to pinpoint what things would classify her as hot.

Maybe it was that giant smile on her face that she always wore after a particularly good performance. Maybe it was her pretty brown eyes that always hit the light in just the right way so that they always sparkled. Maybe it was the way she carried herself in the photo, clearly tired but still performance ready, still immaculate. Simon’s heart picked up speed as he thought of all of the other things about Grace that someone might be attracted to, things that couldn’t be captured in the picture.

The laugh that she gave when she was sure that she was right about something, that trilling sound she made with her mouth when she wanted to concentrate, the way that she moved so effortlessly, as if gravity was no enemy to her. Simon quickly changed the photo and tried to forget about how nice it might be to kiss Grace just to see what would happen but his brain refused to let him. It refused to let him stop thinking about kissing Grace and it refused to let him stop noticing how pretty she was.

This was a particular problem as Simon hung out with Grace a lot and when you hang out with someone a lot constantly being distracted by how attractive they are isn’t a great way to keep up conversation. Now the two of them sat together, Grace having come over to his house and Simon who had to keep reminding himself that normal people didn’t randomly stare at their best friend for long stretches of time had suggested they watch a movie. A movie was the perfect idea in Simon’s mind because it meant that he could focus on that and not on Grace.

So Simon had put on some random movie and sat down to watch it and to not be distracted by how absolutely pretty Grace was and probably always had been now that he was thinking about it. It had started off fine, for the most part. The only issue came of course when a kissing scene between the two leads had started. Simon hated that his heart started beating louder and faster because there was no reason for it to do that. Had he been watching this movie alone, or with anyone else on the planet, he would be fine.

“Are you okay?” Grace asked. And Simon snapped out of his mild trance to look at her, though he avoided her eyes. That wasn’t new, he always had trouble looking Grace in the eyes when he was nervous, which was a lot. He wondered how long he’d been doing that, and if that meant he’d liked Grace for longer then even he’d realized.

“I’m fine.” Simon muttered as he tried to go back to watching the movie and avoiding eye contact. Grace stared him down for a while longer.

“Are you sure? You seem a little off today.” she said and Simon groaned mentally because the absolute worst part about having a crush on your best friend is that unlike every other person on the planet they are going to realize when you start acting differently. Simon scoured his brain for an excuse that would be plausible while not making Grace worry. He didn’t want her to know that he liked her just like he didn’t want her to be upset with him.

“I’m just…” Simon trailed off searching for something, anything that might not make it painfully obvious that his strange behavior was a result of him realizing that he liked his best friend. “I’ve been having trouble in school, and I’m kind of stressed out about it.” he said. Grace looked a little surprised but nodded and put a gentle hand on his shoulder. It hadn’t been what he’d intended to happen but he certainly made no move against her doing it.

“School sucks, but don’t let it stress you out okay? The last thing I want is for you to burn out and be stuck acting off forever; besides, if anyone doesn’t have to worry about school it’s you, you’re the smartest person I know.” she said happily. Simon swallowed nervously and tried to ignore the knot in his stomach as he nodded and tried to go back to the movie. Grace looked at him seriously. “Promise that you’ll take care of yourself Simon.” she said sternly and Simon finally looked her in the eyes and responded.

“I promise I’ll take care of myself.” he said and Grace gave him that smile that he adored so much.

“Good.” she responded before returning to the movie herself. At that moment Simon knew that somehow he’d have to get over this crush, or else he’d spend the rest of his life worrying his best friend. As he laid in bed that night Simon remembered something important. The only way to get a song out of your head is to listen to it. By that logic, the only way to stop thinking about kissing Grace was to kiss her for real. He felt his face grow hot at the idea but he decided it was the only way to do it.

Simon had never kissed anyone before and he knew Grace hadn’t either or else she would have told him about it. But they’d both seen movies, and he was sure he knew enough to get by. Besides it didn’t have to be a real kiss, it could be quick and short. You didn't have to listen to the song a million times to get it out of your head, just once. Simon was sure that one quick tiny kiss from Grace was all that he would need for things to go back to normal. He also had no idea how he’d go about asking.

Grace had after all promised that he’d never receive a kiss from her and while he was fairly sure it was a joke it wasn’t like he could simply tap her on the shoulder the next time he saw her and ask her to kiss him. It would have to come naturally, and since it would be both of their first kiss he figured it should also be romantic, like in the movies. After some deliberation Simon had a plan.

He knew from his astronomy phase that there would be a meteor shower occurring nearby later that week and his dad had an old telescope that he could borrow. The two could go there to hang out and see the lights. Then, calmly and smoothly like a movie character Simon would simply ask Grace if he could kiss her laying out all of the reasons why she should. Thoroughly convinced, she’d say yes, they’d quickly kiss, and he’d be cured of his feelings for her. Then things could go back to the way they were supposed to be.

Satisfied with his plan Simon began setting all of the pieces into motion for the night, starting with asking his father if he could borrow the telescope which he’d approved of, and even offered to give Simon a ride. Having gotten approval alongside transportation all that was left to do was to contact Grace and ask if she would be interested.

“Hey, it’s no big deal but there’s a meteor shower tomorrow, do you want to go see it?” he asked her over the phone at the end of another topic of conversation.

“Sure, sounds fun.” Grace had responded and Simon let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding. He didn’t get a moment of sleep that night as he mentally replayed every scenario that could occur. He thought about what he’d do if she said no, or what he’d do if he was really bad at kissing. He refused to think about what would happen if his feelings persisted however, he knew that they wouldn’t. The day arrived and his father drove him to the hill where they’d agreed to meet up, telescope in the trunk.

“I’ll be parked over there.” Simon’s father said gesturing as he helped him unload the telescope. “Come get me when you're done and I’ll help you put the thing back into the van. Oh, and ask Grace if she wants to come over for dinner.” he added. Simon nodded as they finished setting up the telescope and he sat there nervously waiting for Grace to arrive. He heard the familiar footsteps behind him and Grace sat down next to him not too long after. Simon looked at her and immediately wished that he hadn’t.

She looked gorgeous, she always did but in that moment she looked particularly amazing and Simon could hear his heart in his ears. He prayed that she couldn’t as well. Grace started talking about how nice it was to be up there and how excited she was to see the meteor shower but Simon could barely focus. He had to ask before the meteor shower started or else he wouldn’t be able to focus on that either. Simon was terrified that these feelings would become permanent so terrified that he accidentally blurted out what he’d been wanting to hide.

“Can I kiss you?” he asked suddenly and as soon as it left his mouth he wanted to climb to the highest point in the state and leap off. Quickly he attempted to backpedal, or to in someway justify what had been said. He did his best to stammer out and explanation but was barely half-way down when Grace cut him off with her response.

“Sure.” she said plainly and Simon continued talking for just a while longer because he hadn’t quite registered what she’d said.

“Wait, did you say sure?” he clarified and Grace nodded.

“Yeah, why not? My first kiss might as well be with you.” she mentioned and Simon stared at her dumbfounded.

“I thought you said I’d never get a kiss from you?” he questioned and Grace laughed that same perfect laugh that she always did.

“Simon, that was a joke.” she said and Simon nodded dumbly.

“Okay, let’s kiss then!” he said a little more excited then he meant to. Grace closed her eyes and Simon did two both of them awkwardly inching closer to each other. Grace opened her eyes just slightly and couldn’t hold back a little laugh.

“We probably look really dumb right now.” she said while still laughing. Simon knew that Grace wasn’t laughing at him, or at the idea of kissing him. She had said yes, she was okay with it. That knowledge didn’t stop him from feeling like the biggest idiot on the planet. Simon looked at Grace laughing and felt as though he was being given a harsh reminder that she was out of his league.

“I have to go.” Simon said suddenly as he stood up and started walking away.

“What?” Grace said but that only spurred him to walk faster, and then to run. He ran all the way back to the minivan and climbed into the passenger seat. Wordlessly he communicated that he needed to leave right at that very moment and his father took him home without even bothering to ask about the telescope. Simon knew he shouldn’t have left, he knew he should have brushed it off and moved on. But unfortunately he’d already made his bed and now he would lie in it. So for three weeks Simon avoided Grace like the plague.

He ignored her calls to his cell phone, he muted the home phone, and he made sure to emphasize to his parents that if Grace asked, he wasn’t around. Simon figured three weeks was all it would take. After all, Grace was awesome, and popular. It wouldn’t take her that long to forget him and to move on. Towards the end of the third week the calls did stop and Simon figured that Grace had finally given up on him. The idea made him sadder than he’d ever been in his life but he ignored that fact. It was over.

Or at least he thought it was until one day while working at his desk he heard a knock on his window and saw Grace standing outside. He practically jumped out of his skin and dropped to the floor in the hopes that she hadn’t seen him.

“I can see you Simon.” she said tiredly. “I’m walking to the door and you better open.” she said. This was a promise she kept as Grace did indeed walk to the front door and knock. Simon weighed his options before deciding to open the door. After all, it seemed it was the only way to rip the band-aid off. When he did open the door he was greeted by a very annoyed looking Grace who had his dad’s telescope in her hands.

“Hi…” he said awkwardly and Grace’s look of annoyance melted into something else.

“Do you hate me?” she asked and suddenly Simon realized what it had melted into, sadness.

“What? No, I don’t hate you! I could never hate you.” he said honestly and Grace stared at him intensely.

“Then why have you been ignoring me for the past three weeks? Why did you run off on me? Did I do something to upset you?” she asked and Simon frantically waved his arms in response.

“No, it wasn’t that at all.” he said.

“Then what was it, don’t lie to me Simon.” Grace said. Simon thought again about what the best course of action would be, and decided on a half truth.

“I was embarrassed about what happened at the meteor shower.” he admitted and Grace gave him a long hard look before softening.

“You don't ever need to be embarrassed around me, I’ve seen you at your most embarrassing.” she said. Simon gave her an earnest look.

“I know, I’m sorry for freaking you out.” he admitted.

“Don’t ever disappear on me like that again and we’ll be even,” she said seriously. “Now give me a hug.” she added and he obliged. Simon of course still hadn’t solved his problem, or told Grace he liked her, but that was a problem for a different time. Right now, he was getting a hug from his best friend and that was all he wanted to focus on. Right now, Simon was happy.


	20. The Bedroom

Another year had passed and alongside it another set of birthdays. Last month Grace had turned fourteen and two days ago Simon had done the same. Functionally, nothing had changed, both were still the same people who they’d been before. However, there was something that had plagued Simon’s mind ever since the two had turned fourteen. That thing was the impending tide of high school. Soon both would start high school and that fact terrified Simon not because of any academic challenges but because of personal ones.

Simon had seen enough high school movies to feel as though he had a solid grasp on what went on in them. Stuff like dating, and kissing, and losing all of your old friends because you made new ones. It was enough to keep him lying awake at night thinking about it. Him and Grace had never gone to the same school and that obviously wasn’t likely to change any time soon. She’d shown him pictures of where she’d been attending, some huge posh prep school with a uniform like her current one. There was no way he’d ever go to a place like that.

But Simon couldn’t stop thinking about what all those movies had taught him. Following that logic train Grace would go to high school and find a new, cooler best friend. In addition, Grace was obviously pretty and had tons of followers on social media, she’d no doubt have a boyfriend too. Simon would be forced to watch as his best friend in the entire world became someone else’s best friend, and as she started dating. That idea made Simon sick to his stomach, Grace dating someone else.

After days of being kept up all night by these annoying all consuming thoughts something finally clicked into place for Simon. Sitting up in his bed one night Simon decided that no matter what it took he’d find a way to get into that school. Climbing out of bed and creeping downstairs to the family desktop Simon got to work researching the school in earnest. The first thing he discovered was the tuition price and that would’ve made him burst into laughter had he not been trying to be quiet. There was no way in hell his parents would be able to afford it.

Clicking over to another tab on their website Simon found the section that talked about scholarships, tucked away under multiple other tabs likely to keep it hidden. Reading over it he was relieved to find that the scholarships they offered were for things other than sports and he read over some of the ones he felt qualified for. There was a lot of work to be done if he wanted to even apply for one of these scholarships let alone actually achieve one. If he wanted even the slightest chance of success he’d need Grace’s help.

Resolving to call her tomorrow Simon deleted the computer's history so as not to raise suspicion from his parents and went back to bed. Of course, when he did tell Grace that he wanted to go to her school he wouldn’t be able to share the true reason which was of course that he was terrified that the mystical power of high school would destroy their friendship. Even thinking about it made Simon feel silly but he couldn’t help worrying about it. Grace was just going to get more and more amazing, and he was going to stay the same.

“Wouldn’t it be awesome if we went to the same high school.” Simon mentioned off hand as he and Grace sat on the balcony the next day. Before he could call her Grace had invited him over, and he’d decided to propose the idea in person. Grace looked at him and gave him that same beautiful smile that shone through in all of her pictures.

“Oh my god yes! We could go to class together and complain about teachers and stuff, plus we could ride to school together every day.” Grace said listing off what could be accomplished if the two attended the same school.

“And we could go to dances together and stuff.” Simon added quietly. Grace put her arms around his shoulders as a response.

“You’re right, it would be so cool.” she said happily before her smile faded. “Now, why would you bring that up and make me excited and then force me to remember that it’s not happening.” she said feigning being upset likely to hide her actual disappointment. Simon laughed and shook his head.

“It can happen.” he began excitedly. “I looked up a bunch of stuff about your school and found out about all of these scholarships they have. If I can get one the two of us can go to high school together.” he explained. Grace looked excited but skeptical.

“Are you serious?” she asked “Because if you get my hopes up for disappointment I’m going to be super mad.” she said jokingly. Simon nodded at her comment.

“It’s going to be a lot of work, but I think I can do it.” he said. “And if I can, then it’ll be Grace and Simon taking on high school together.” he added. At this Grace couldn’t contain her excitement and practically beamed at the idea.

“Do your parents know about this?” she asked. Simon shook his head.

“I want to wait until I have good news so that I can tell them.” he explained and Grace nodded with a sly smile on her face.

“Then let’s get them some good news.” she said and the two returned inside from the balcony to pull up the school information on scholarships. Quickly one caught both of their eyes. Each applicant was only allowed to apply for one full ride scholarship which was what Simon needed, and one of them seemed to be made for him. That one was the scholarship for the robotics program. As the two read over the requirements together it was clear that a lot of work would have to be done.

“So, just to apply, I’ll need a typed essay, a video presentation, and a working model.” Simon said reading it over. Grace nodded.

“Yeah, the robotics program is the best in the country so it makes sense that they're exclusive. But it says here that they are talking applicants until July 18th, it’s only March which means we have plenty of time.” she added hopefully. Still, it seemed the nervousness that Simon felt couldn’t be contained as he still looked worried.

“There are probably hundreds or thousands of people applying for this same scholarship, how am I going to stand out compared to all of them?” he muttered. Grace turned away from them and gave him a serious look.

“You want to know how you’re going to stand out?” she asked. Simon nodded. “You’re going to stand out because you are Simon Douglas Laurent and you are the greatest! You are my best friend and you’re a badass!” she exclaimed. “Say it!” she emphasized and Simon did as she asked.

“I’m a badass?” he said though it came out as more of a question than anything.

“Are you asking me or are you telling me? The only way you’re going to get anything in this world is with confidence Simon. Both you and I know that you have the skill to do anything you want, so make everyone else know it too.” she stated and Simon finally projected enough confidence to proudly proclaim that he was indeed a badass. “Now let’s get you a scholarship.” she said seriously.

Simon nodded and the two got to work on planning how exactly they would tackle each individual section of his scholarship requirements. First was the essay, then Simon would make the working model, and finally Grace would help him with the video. After laying all of this out Grace also laid out goals for when each part should be completed.

“Everything has to be perfect.” Simon emphasized and Grace recognized this giving each section tons of time to get done and workshopped. After typing all of this out in a document the two stared at their work happily.

“Now, first things first, you’ve got to get to work on that essay.” Grace said handing Simon her laptop and getting up.

“Where are you going?’ Simon questioned as Grace picked up Cleo and started walking towards the door.

“You need to work, and I wouldn’t want to disturb your creative process.” she said. Simon rolled his eyes.

“You’re going downstairs to watch TV aren’t you?” he said.

“You can’t prove that.” Grace responded as she exited the room with her cat, leaving Simon all alone to write with nothing but his own thoughts for comfort. Staring at the blank document Simon knew that what would be expected from him was a sob story. More than likely the rich old men who would read over his essay wanted to hear about some sad, poor kid with an awful family life so that they could pat themselves on the back for giving him a chance. But that wasn’t Simon’s reality at all. Sure his family didn’t have a ton of money but they were always okay.

Even more importantly though, they loved both him and each other. They requested that they tell him why he wanted to go to their school and what they wanted to hear was because it was his only hope of a bright future but that just wasn’t the case. Simon looked around Grace’s room and found that being in there without her felt odd. Then again, it also felt like home, he’d spent four years hanging around this room after all. Unconsciously, Simon started to write about that, about the four years that had changed his life.

Before he even realized it Simon had written a very solid start to the essay, talking about how much he’d grown and changed over the years and how much of that development had been spurred on by his best friend. How he wanted to keep growing and developing at their school both because it was the best, but also because it was where his friend was. Simon would never allow Grace to read something so sappy, it would be far too embarrassing, but it felt good to get out.

Eventually, Grace returned to the room and Simon told her progress was coming along nicely. She was happy to hear this and that sparked the beginning of their journey to get Simon a scholarship. Simon would come over to Grace’s place often to work on his essay, because it was on her computer. Some days Simon would be so absorbed in his work that he wouldn’t even speak for long periods of time, but most often they joked while he worked. Simon was so creatively spurred that he finished the essay in April, a month ahead of schedule.

Then he moved on to making a working model. This part of the application process had a lot of freedom and Simon wasn’t quite sure what he wanted to make, often just gathering parts and trying things out. Grace would come over to his house to keep him company while he tried to get a grasp on what he was even going to create. Even when he made no progress having Grace around while he worked still made him feel as though he was accomplishing something. He did however, get a working model ready by June, leaving the video.

This was done in one afternoon in Grace’s backyard. She recorded it off of her phone and though both had to stop several times because they got distracted joking with each other the video was eventually completed. With the final piece of his application materials completed Simon gathered everything together for final submission. Having sent everything in all Simon had to do was wait for a response from the school. Simon had assumed that finally completing everything would make him more relaxed but the opposite was true.

The weeks leading up to getting a response were the most stressful of his life. What if he’d been rejected? Not only would he have wasted months of his time, he’d also have failed to prevent the reason he’d done all of this in the first place, he’d lose Grace. He couldn’t sleep, or eat, or think clearly as he waited for the day when responses were supposed to arrive. He was thinking about and being stressed about this late one night when he received a frantic phone call. Seeing that it was from Grace Simon was confused.

She never called this late at night and the fact that she had worried him. He picked up quickly and waited to hear what she had to say. “Simon, they just released application responses you’ve got to check right now!” she said frantically and Simon rubbed the sleep from his eyes and crept downstairs to the family computer in order to see the answer for himself. Deeply terrified he logged into the computer and checked the email he’d set up specifically for this purpose. Just as he knew there would be, an email from the school was there.

“Yeah, they sent it.” Simon said quietly.

“Well, what does it say?” Grace asked nervously. Simon paused for a beat as he waited for his brain to catch up with his eyes in processing the information.

“Grace,” he began.

“Yeah,” she responded.

“We’re going to high school together.” he said with as much excitement as he could muster quietly. Grace sounded like she wanted to scream out of excitement but couldn’t due to the fact that it was so late at night. “I’m going back to bed, I have to tell my parents in the morning.” he explained and Grace understood and hung up. Simon couldn’t believe that this wasn’t all some awesome dream. That next morning he rehearsed what he’d say to his parents about the situation.

For them, he’d emphasize the prestige of the school and how hard he’d worked to get in. He wouldn't mention that he’d really only done all of this out of some primal fear that Grace would get new friends and a boyfriend. After feeling as though he’d properly prepared himself to explain everything to his parents he began slowly at breakfast.

“I’m really excited to start high school.” he began quietly. His mother sighed and looked at him softly.

“Simon, we can’t afford that school.” she said and Simon looked at her confused.

“What are you talking about?” he questioned and his father gave a response.

“We saw that you were looking up that school and while it’s obviously amazing, we just can’t afford it.” he said. Simon looked at them dumbfounded for a moment before laughing.

“You don’t have to.” he said and after an explanation of how he’d been spending the last few months his parents were filled in. Both were obviously very proud of their son for having achieved such amazing things but there was clearly something else they wanted to say.

“Aren’t you going to miss your friends starting a new school so far away?” his mother questioned. Simon threw Archduke Franz Ferdinand a piece of bacon and gave a rehearsed response.

“It’s worth it for the opportunity.” he said and his mother seemed to agree. That wasn’t what Simon had really wanted to say however. What he had really wanted to say was that he could make more friends, but he couldn’t find another Grace Monroe. There were a thousand people who he could create with, joke with, laugh with. But there was only one person who could so thoroughly consume his mind and heart and her name was Grace Monroe. So he’d be wherever she was.


	21. The Mall

Grace loved the mall. Going with others almost felt like a ritualistic bonding experience. A monument to consumerism in its greatest physical form, a brick and mortar reminder of the power of the dollar. And yet it wasn’t like that at all not really. The mall was most important not for the transactions it held but for the interactions inside. Grace loved going to the mall because within there were other people, shopping and eating and interacting. When she was inside with a friend, usually Simon, she was a part of a tapestry of people.

Today she was at the mall but she wasn’t there with Simon or Elisha as she usually was rather, she was there alone. Going to the mall alone, rather than being an aforementioned bonding experience it felt more like a test of patience. So many loud, obnoxious groups wasting time seemed more annoying than anything when you weren’t a part of one. And one this early August afternoon before the start of her first year of high school, Grace was getting annoyed. So annoyed in fact that she didn’t notice she was being followed.

That was until she felt someone touch her shoulder at least. At the sudden contact Grace jumped back and swung around, bracing herself to face who ever had done it. However she was surprised to find that the person who had grabbed her didn’t seem particularly malicious or dangerous. In fact, he was a boy, seemingly around her own age. He held a tube of lip-gloss in his hand and took on a guarded, opened handed stance upon confrontation. Grace stared at the boy for a moment before confronting him.

“Are you following me?” she asked seriously. The boy still looked nervous but shook his head furiously.

“No! Well, not really.” he said awkwardly. Grace narrowed her eyebrows at him, wondering about what he could possibly mean by that. Sensing the tension, the boy clarified. “You dropped this, and I wanted to give it back to you.” he said, gesturing to the lip gloss. He handed it to her and examining it confirmed that it was indeed her lip gloss. “I swear that was all.” he muttered. Now that Grace felt a bit more sure that he wasn’t going to be a danger to her she actually took a good look at the buy and was embarrassed when she blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

“You’re cute.” she said unconsciously and the two stared at each other for a while after that. Grace was mortified and honestly considered walking away as fast as her legs could carry her just so she wouldn’t have to face the reality of the situation. She was as equally mortified by the response she got.

“You’re cute too.” he said and now both of them of them stood looking awkwardly at each other flustered and embarrassed in the way that only teenagers really can be. Finally Grace responded, still obviously flustered.

“What’s your name?” she questioned and the boy gave his answer.

“Mark.” he said in response.

“Grace,” she offered. Mark smiled at that.

“Well Grace, can I have your number?” he questioned and Grace gave it to him. The rest of her trip to the mall was relatively uneventful besides the fact that it was spent in the company of another person. She learned that Mark was a year older than her, and was going to attend the same school. He played Lacrosse and had two older brothers. None of that mattered to Grace more than the fact that he seemed to like her however. When they parted, Grace wanted to call him right away to continue her conversation but convinced herself not to out of fear of appearing desperate.

Still, Grace was more excited than she ever had been. Getting a boyfriend had of course been on her plan of how to get the most out of her teenage years but she hadn’t anticipated that it would come so soon. It’s early arrival meant of course that she was ahead of schedule in terms of her plan to have the most amazing years of her life. And Mark really was everything you could ask for in a first boyfriend in Grace’s opinion. Of course she had no expectation of it lasting forever, but that was never the point.

They texted each other frequently after that, to the point where Grace felt that it would be a good idea to share the news with Simon. After all, both he and Elisha were the only people who’d been given access to her plan and she’d told Elisha almost as soon as she left the mall. She held off on telling Simon mostly because she was sure that he had no interest in matters of her love life. After all, Simon’s main concerns these days were building his robots, and practicing his French. Despite this Grace brought it up the next time she was over at his house.

“You know, the last time I was at the mall I met a cute guy.” she said casually. At the moment Simon had been playing piano, something Grace knew he hadn’t done in quite a while between all of the other stuff he had going on. At her announcement he’d hit a sour note which gave her news a more ominous quality than she’d intended. Simon turned from the piano to look at her.

“Oh,” he said awkwardly. “What are you telling me for?” he asked. Grace felt herself become a bit self conscious at the comment and she wondered for a moment why she’d told Simon before the answer came back to her.

“I told you because you're my best friend and I wanted you to know.” he explained and Simon's face seemed to flip through a range of unreadable emotions before settling on platonic affection.

“Let me see a picture of this guy.” he said with a bit more enthusiasm, something which made Grace far happier than she’d been previously. Grabbing her phone and flipping through her text conversation with the guy she found a nice looking picture he’d sent to her and showed it to Simon.

“What do you think?” she asked and Simon shrugged.

“I don’t know, I guess he’s fine.” Simon responded uninterested and Grace rolled her eyes.

“You're so lame, forget it.” she began before changing the subject. “Why don’t you start playing again so I can practice my routine?” she questioned and Simon nodded going back to doing just that. This had been the original objective of his playing anyway. Alongside all of the other amazing programs their future school offered they had a very competitive ballet troupe Grace wanted to get into and that meant staying on her A-game all summer long. Simon having access to piano playing skills made practicing feel more familiar.

After her time with Simon that day she resumed her texting of Mark and at that moment realized that despite their constant texting they hadn’t been on a date, not really. She wondered if he was going to ask her out which is what she assumed began relationships. She of course didn’t want to be the one to ask, not because she felt she couldn’t, but because she feared being pushy. Then again it occurred to Grace that he might have been having the exact same reaction. Still, Grace would wait patiently to be asked out.

She wouldn’t have to wait long as about a week after their meeting Mark had sent her a text asking if she wanted to go to the mall again and Grace had eagerly responded with yes. This was it, her real first date. Of course Grace had to ensure that everything went perfectly from her outfit and general appearance to all of her mannerisms. Grace wanted this to be good and to work. Normally in cases where Grace needed to achieve the height of perfection she’d invite Simon over to keep her company while she did so but Simon’s apathy towards this aspect of her life was obvious.

That meant that throughout the process of getting her clothes and styling her hair Grace was alone with nothing but her own thoughts. Being alone with your own thoughts is probably the worst thing you can do to yourself before a date and the fact that she had constant thoughts of how badly that this was going to go swirling around in her had almost made Grace want to cancel the whole thing and stay in bed. However Grace Monroe was anything but a quitter and she had said that she would do this so she would.

As she climbed into the limo and sat comfortably in the backseat she took a photo of herself to post on her social media platforms with the hope that some validation from her loyal and growing fanbase would calm her down. Luckily for her it did as the likes and comments from those who followed her closely slowly arrived assuring Grace that things would go fine. Climbing out of the car and heading towards the mall she quickly met up with Mark who opened with a compliment.

“You look really nice.” he said and Grace smiled both because it was a nice compliment and because it calmed her down. She looked fine, he thought she looked fine, this was going to be okay.

“You look nice too.” she responded and with his smile all of the doubts that she’d built up while getting ready melted away. That truly was the crux of their bonding; they complimented each other. Not just literally as they’d demonstrated but also metaphorically. He played sports which years of high school movies told Grace meant that he was popular. That was what she’d always wanted to be, so it was a good fit. And besides that they looked good together. Walking through the mall holding hands, they looked like a cute couple.

Grace cared about being perfect in everything she did and despite her struggles with it she wanted it badly. A large part of being perfect was looking perfect and when she was with Mark in that mall, at that moment she felt she looked perfect. The ideal of a high school couple, a force of nature no one could argue against. He looked nice, she looked nice, and they looked even nicer together. When the date had concluded she’d given him a kiss on the cheek and said she had a nice time. He’d asked if she wanted to be his girlfriend and she said yes.

Grace didn’t know what that realistically entailed but it sounded officially and perfect so she’d agreed. To commemorate she’d taken a picture of the two of them which was shared on her page. She was sure that the people she considered her fans would greatly enjoy this. After all, if her theory about most of her early fanbase seeing her as a means of escapism due to her luxurious life and prowess in dance, being in a relationship only added to that fantasy for many of them.

When she returned home Grace had immediately gone to her room and recounted her day to Cleo who was deeply uninterested in the story and cared far more about getting pet than Grace’s escapades. However Grace told the story anyway mostly because Elisha hadn’t answered her phone and Grace needed someone to recount the story to who wasn’t Simon. It dawned on Grace that she could probably use less fans and more friends but it wasn’t a train of thought she was interested in following.

Things continued to go well for the next while, the two went on dates and posted pictures together. Grace would recount these stories to Elisha and avoid sharing them with Simon because she knew he wouldn’t care and Grace found no point in recounting a story to someone who wasn’t listening, unless that someone was her cat of course. One day however while sharpening her skills while Simon practiced piano she’d let something slip.

“I should ask Mark if he knows any instruments.” she’d mused. “Maybe he can play with us sometime.” she’d referenced casually. Simon had hit another sour note and at the mention he’d swung around to look at Grace. Trying to seem casually he’d said something to Grace.

“Why would you want that?” he asked and Grace narrowed her eyebrows before giving an answer.

“I would want that because he’s my boyfriend and I want to spend time with him.” she explained and Simon rolled his eyes.

“I think you do enough of that already.” he muttered and Grace began to say something before letting out a gasp of realization.

“Oh my god, you’re totally jealous!” she exclaimed excitedly that she’d cracked the code. Simon made something between a cough and a choking noise at her statement and took a moment to compose himself before responding.

“What? Jealous? I’m not jealous, why would I be jealous?” he said frantically but both he and Grace knew that his words were deeply unconvincing. She laughed at how flustered her realization had made him, taking it as proof that her assumptions were correct.

“You’re jealous because I’m in a relationship and you’re not.” she stated matter of factly. At this Simon’s face once again went through a series of unreadable emotions finally settling on relief. He let out a sigh and responded.

“Yep, you got me I’m totally jealous that I don’t have a girlfriend. Can we go back to playing now?” he said, trying to change the subject as he turned back towards the piano. Grace put her arms around his shoulders and shook her head.

“Aww, don’t feel bad Simon. If you got out more I’m sure I could find you a girlfriend.” she joked. “I mean, you speak French, girls love that.” she added in a joking attempt to give confidence to her friend. Simon rolled his eyes once again.

“I hope you don’t mind me saying but I think I’ll pass on the offer.” he responded and Grace frowned.

“But it would be so fun! We could go on double dates and stuff, just think about it.” she said once again enamored with the idea of getting Simon a romantic interest. Simon shook his head at the idea.

“Whatever girl you set me up with would be in an awful position considering she’d have to contend with my love for robots and our years of friendship for my attention.” she muttered and Grace laughed at his statement while messing up his hair.

“You say that now, but the right girl will make you put both of those things on the backburner.” Grace assessed. Simon groaned at her comment and waved off her idea.

“Even if that were true which it is not, I’m fairly sure that you have no idea what type of girl I’d even like.” he said seriously and Grace scoffed at this.

“We’ve been best friends for years, I’m pretty sure I can tell what kind of girl you’d be into.” she said and Grace likely would have pushed harder on this front had her phone not rang. Stopping to grab it Grace saw that the call was from Mark and after giving Simon an apologetic glance picked up the phone. “Yeah, I can talk.” she said at his question of if she was free and the conversation quickly made her lose track of time. After another apology to Simon for taking up so much of his time Grace was picked up by Peirce.

On the drive home, just out of curiosity she compared the likes on different types of photos and found that her ones with Mark got more likes than her other ones by a large margin. This was enough to convince Grace that even if a time came where she was no longer happy in a relationship it was better to stay in one. After all, if she wanted to be perfect, that sometimes came with a price. It hadn’t yet and she hoped it wouldn’t but if it did, that was a sacrifice she was willing to make.


	22. The School

Simon was in high school and he was happy. It all felt very surreal to say the least. He remembered very clearly the first day of school when he and Grace had rolled up to the school’s front gates and he’d gotten his first real look at the place. It was gigantic and old looking, it honestly made him feel tiny. As the two had walked the halls together towards their lockers Simon had questioned if he’d made a huge mistake. Grace, this was her element but Simon? People like him weren’t built for places like this.

Or at least that’s what he’d thought initially. About three months into the school year Simon felt as though he’d been silly for ever believing it to be true. He’d expected high school to be all drama, and cliques, and having to deal with being a complete and total nerd in the face of popular people but that wasn’t the case at all. As he quickly came to learn, no one really cared about that stuff, most people just wanted to do their work and go home. And the overachievers weren't ostracized, they were a community.

Being that he’d gotten in on a robotics scholarship and most of his classes were formed around that field Simon met a lot of overachievers, and so he made a lot of friends. He still wouldn't have considered himself any type of popular but he felt normal, something he couldn’t say about his other school experiences even at the best of times. Of course there was a downside to having gotten in on a specialized scholarship and that was the fact that he had less classes with Grace than he would have liked.

They were perhaps even closer than before, seeing each other every morning when they rode to school and every afternoon when they’d hang out before being taken home. And they did still have two classes together plus lunch, but out of eight classes in his day it wasn’t enough. Though Simon understood that a large source of his anxiousness about not having enough classes with Grace was external. That particular source of anxiety went by the name of Mark and Simon got a headache just thinking about him.

He had five classes with Grace, plus lunch which meant that everyday when all Simon wanted to do was eat his ham sandwich and spend a few fleeting moments pretending that he might one day have a chance with the most perfect person in his world wedged in between them was a living reality check. Grace had told him about Mark before the day they’d first met, but Simon had mostly tuned it out, hoping that their relationship would fizzle out before he’d ever have to meet the guy.Of course he’d be granted no such luck.

It had been at lunch on that first day, he and Grace had just sat down to eat when Mark had appeared and slotted himself between the two of them as if Simon didn’t exist at all. They’d gone on complimenting each other and being sickeningly cute when suddenly he seemed to notice his existence.

“You’re Simon right? I’m Mark.” he’d said matter of factly. Simon had begun to respond but he’d quickly realized that Mark was one of those people who would have a conversation at you instead of with you. “You know anything about lacrosse? Did you know was the school’s youngest ever state champion last year.” he’d said and Grace had laughed even though he hadn’t said anything funny.

“Saviez-vous que je m'en fous?” Simon had muttered under his breath and Mark had given him a strange look. Simon loved being able to speak French for many reasons, but stuff like that was up there on his list. “Sorry, sometimes I slip up in my langues. I said that’s really interesting.” he lied through his teeth. Grace gave him a look like she didn’t believe him, and that was likely because she didn’t. However, Simon knew her French wasn’t good enough to call him out, so she let it go.

The lunch had continued on like that and Simon had once again wondered if he made a mistake trying to come to this school. However, there had been a moment later on in that week which had been the first sign that thing would be okay. One of the two classes he and Grace had together was gym and on the Friday of their first week they’d had to change for gym for the first time. Simon didn’t actually remember what they did, probably something unimportant, all he remembered was that they ran.

Grace was a dancer and as a result she was very swift and light on her feet. Simon was very much not that, being incredibly slow and not that physically inclined. On that first day when Simon had fallen behind the group Grace had waited for him and it made his soul soar because they both knew that she didn’t have to. That she could be at the front of the pack, but she stayed behind for him. That hadn’t even been the most important moment for Simon however. The uniform that the school made them wear required a tie, and Simon didn’t know how to tie one.

His parents would always do it for him before school. However, during gym they had to change and Simon quickly found the issue when he tried to get ready after gym class had ended. Now, Simon had read the school’s handbook cover to cover and he knew that having an untied tie was considered a dress code violation and that the only time it was allowed was in the locker room. Being that he wasn’t in the mood to get a detention in his first week Simon had sat in the locker room trying to think of a loophole to this when Grace came around.

“Did you forget that you have a class after this?” Grace questioned standing just outside the doorway of the boy’s locker room. Simon shook his head, standing on the other side of the door.

“I didn’t, but if I leave this locker room with my tie untied I’ll get a detention for dress code violation.” he explained. Grace looked at him curiously.

“Then tie your tie.” she said as if Simon was being a complete idiot. He rolled his eyes at her obvious comment but then looked embarrassed as he gave his response.

“I can't, I don’t know how,” he explained. He expected Grace to chuckle at this and to chide him for being so irresponsible, but instead she looked sympathetic.

“I’ll tie it for you.” she said, taking a step closer and Simon moved backwards nervously.

“You can’t come into the boy’s locker room, then you’ll get a detention.” he explained and Grace thought for a moment before coming to a realization and beckoning Simon closer to the door frame.

“If I stand on this side of the doorway and you stand on the other side, technically neither of us is where we aren’t supposed to be.” she said and Simon nodded, understanding her reasoning. Gently, she took her hands to his tie and with the precision of someone who’d done it a million times Grace tied and straightened Simon’s tie for him. Simon prayed to god that she didn’t try to look at him as she did it, because he was sure he was the color of a tomato just from Grace being that close to him. At the same time he could feel his heart beating in his ears like a drum.

“T-thanks.” Simon stuttered out nervously after she finished and the two walked off to their separate classes. The experience had been something so small and yet it had felt so intense to Simon it was insane. Maybe it was the fact that he didn’t get to have as many classes with her as he would have liked, or maybe it was the fact that during one of his few precious times with her he was also stuck with Mark, but that tiny moment of intimacy that was just for the two of them made Simon feel like he was in heaven.

It became a routine for the two of them. After gym class they’d stand in that doorway and she’d fix his tie. A few times teachers had questioned them and they’d explain that they weren’t breaking any rules so it had been dropped. Of course by that next week Simon did know how to tie a tie, but they kept it up anyway. A curious thing that Simon noticed however being three months into the school year, was that other people were doing it too. Not just in the doorways of locker rooms but in the hallways and before the start of classes girls would fix boys ties. The people who did this however, were couples.

Simon quietly wondered if Grace knew that couples had taken up their practice as a sign of intimacy. He wondered if Mark knew that she did it for him every single day. Then he wondered if she did it for Mark, straightening his tie during one of the five classes that they had together. The idea of the two of them being that close gave Simon a combination of terror and disgust so he elected not to think about it any further. The other class that Grace and Simon had together was French.

While Simon was practicality fluent and definitely could take a higher level class he’d decided to stay with Grace and take the lowest level. It was nice to have another class together and besides it was essentially a free pass for him. He didn’t have to pay attention at all, which meant that he could spend his time helping Grace conjugate verbs, and writing love poems in his notebook. He figured that it was okay because they were all in French and therefore technically educational.

“Can I borrow a piece of paper?” Grace asked and Simon quickly stopped thinking about the first week at school and grabbed his notebook to tear one out for her.

“Here you go.” he said as he handed it to her and she thanked him before turning back around. Simon always had to be extra careful about his notebook because while Grace’s French probably wasn't good enough to decipher it now, if anyone else found out and it was traced back to him there wasn’t a doubt in his mind that she would hate him and that Mark would kick his ass. Simon figured that Grace wouldn’t want him to, but she wouldn’t really have a choice. Simon didn’t really want to hate Mark so much as it was a fact of life.

He figured it was fair because Mark hated him too. The other day he’d said as much. They’d made it to lunch before Grace so the two of them had sat in uncomfortable silence which Simon would have been content to do except Mark had tuned to look at and him and said,

“I don’t know what you think is going to happen, but Grace is mine.” and Simon swallowed the bite of ham sandwich he was eating and gave his response in the most cynical voice he could muster.

“Grace isn’t yours, she isn’t anybody's, she’s Grace.” he’d said calmly and Mark had rolled his eyes and scowled.

“It’s an expression and you know it. Don’t try to make me the bad guy because I don’t want you thinking you can try to make a move on my girlfriend.” he said seriously. Simon rolled his eyes at him and gave yet another dry response.

“Me and Grace are friends, she already told you that.” he said and Mark had glared at him.

“She trusts you; I don’t. You're not special. I know tons of guys like you who play the best friend role because they're just waiting to try something.” he responded.

“Va te faire foutre.” Simon muttered and Mark looked even more pissed.

“If you have something to say, say it to my face.” he said and Simon thought about saying something snarky in response but elected to simply finish his bite of sandwich, Grace appeared right after ending the conversation. That had been yesterday and he was sure that the point still stood. Simon was deeply offended by the insinuation that he and Grace weren’t really friends, that he was only pretending in the hope to date her. He’d been best friends with Grace before he liked her and he was sure he’d be best friends with her after.

All in all this crush he had on her was, at least to Simon’s mind, a tiny blip in what would surely be a long and fruitful friendship. It would end, all he had to do was be patient about it. It was just a crush after all, and crushes ended. This one would too and things would go back to normal. After French class Simon went about the rest of his day like usual and met Grace at her locker at the end of the day as he always did. She was gathering her books from her locker and took a moment to look hatefully at her algebra textbook, something that Simon internally laughed at.

“You want me to come over and I’ll help you study?” Simon questioned and Grace looked deeply grateful.

“Yes, you know I’m absolutely garbage at math.” she responded and so not too long after Simon found himself in Grace’s room helping her work through the homework and concepts. Simon knew that it wasn’t so much that Grace was bad at math as it was that she was so focused on so many other things that remembering the Pythagorean theorem often took a back seat in terms of priority. So it wasn’t a matter of teaching Grace the concepts; she already knew them. It was just getting her to remember.

“Perfect, you’re all set for the test.” Simon said after Grace had announced she felt confident in her abilities. The two sat at the homework desk in her bedroom, to the left of the balcony. Grace leaned over and embraced Simon.

“I seriously don’t know what I would do without your help.” she responded and Simon was very careful not to make it utterly obvious that his heart rate was off of the charts. As she pulled away from the hug Grace took a long look at Simon before standing up from her chair and walking behind him. “I’m braiding your hair, it’s long enough now.” she said and Simon started to make an objection before he felt Grace’s delicate and deliberate hands quickly and gently braiding his strands of hair.

Simon felt like he was ascended, once again another small moment of intimacy, of care, had completely destroyed him. As Grace’s fingers danced across his scalp Simon realized that he was completely wrong. This was his life from now on, he would never be able to just be Grace's friend again without suffering in silence. This was far deeper than a crush and the only way it would end would be if he forced it to end. Otherwise he’d be doomed to spend the rest of his life best friends with someone who he was in love with.

“Thanks.” he muttered and Grace gave him a curious look before brushing it off. “Hey, were you serious about setting me up with someone?” he asked and Grace lit up with excitement.

“Of course I was! First you let me braid your hair and now you let me get you a girlfriend? This day just keeps getting better.” she said happily. Rushing over Grace grabbed the school’s class photo and handed it to Simon. “Pick any girl you want, I’ll find a way to get the two of you together.” she said earnestly and Simon nodded, before picking at random. There was only one girl in that photo who he wanted, and he’d never have her.


	23. The Dance

Grace and Simon’s school was a lot of things. It was big and haughty and a lot of the kids were nice but a lot of them also thought they were better than everyone else. Another thing it was, was overwhelming white. Simon felt like that was something he should have noticed but it hadn't been. In fact, the only reason he knew was because Grace had pointed it out to him one day. When asked why she had noticed it her answer had been quite succinct and clear.

“When you're used to being the only black girl in the room you kind of get in the habit of checking if you're the only one in the building.” she’d said and Simon had felt a bit bad that he’d brought it up from the matter of fact way she’d stated it. Like it was simply her reality. Probably because it was simply her reality. But Simon’s thoughts about the overwhelming whiteness of their charred school didn’t come out of a vacuum. It was because about five seconds ago when Grace had told him to pick any girl he wanted to get set up with he’d done it randomly.

And he’d just so happened to have picked one of the very few black girls at his school because of course he had. There was a moment where he considered backpedaling and moving his hand somewhere, anywhere else but he figured it would just make things worse. So Simon sat there and Grace looked at the girl he’d chosen and he prayed she didn’t read into it. She was quiet for a moment as she seemed to think about something before her face broke into a huge smile.

“Kayla huh? That’s a good choice, a fellow member of the robotics program.” she said and that caught Simon completely off guard as he was sure he’d never seen the girl who he’d pointed at before. Looking again he saw that Grace was right, though he did reconcile his initial unfamilarness. Kayla was also in the robotics program but she kept her head down, and never said much. Simon wondered if she was also there on scholarship and was afraid to do something to put it in jeopardy. If Simon was smarter he figured he’d be the same way.

“Oh, yeah she’s cool.” he said, trying to fake enthusiasm over his accidental choice. Mostly he felt bad for Kayla. When Grace got it in her head to do something she wouldn’t just do it she would do it flawlessly. There was no doubt in her mind that some way, somehow Grace was going to try and get her to like him or die trying meanwhile Simon would have to explain the situation to the girl before things got messy and complicated. Then again, he did have to get over Grace somehow and maybe this was what he needed.

“You know homecoming is coming up!” Grace said excitedly. “We could double date! That would be awesome,” she said, happy with her own plan. “Of course that doesn't give me that long to set the two of you up but I don’t need to make her love you, I just need to make her go to the dance with you.” she mused as she worked through her own plan. “I’m sure you can do the making her love you part all on your own.” she teased and Simon looked away, embarrassed.

“You have a lot of misplaced faith in me.” Simon muttered and Grace shook her head before explaining her thought process.

“You are literally one of the best guys and know, and you’re super smart, and the two of you both like robots and stuff. You’re practically guaranteed to fall in love.” she said happily. “Just let me set everything up and get the two of you going to homecoming together.” she said happily. Knowing Grace, Simon knew that there was no way he was getting out of it, so he figured he should at least try and entertain the idea of having a good time at homecoming. He also figured that he should at the very last have a conversation with Kayla before Grace played matchmaker.

That next day at school he stared at her for a while during class, trying to really study her in a way he hadn’t before. She had blended into the background of the class for him and seemingly by her interactions with others, she had for most people. He wondered if it was a consequence of her personality or if it was by design. Still, mustering up all of the courage he could manage SImon tapped on her shoulder. When she turned around he finally got a really good look at her outside of the picture and noted what he saw.

“Hey, you’re Kayla right? Im Si-” he began before being cut off by her.

“I know who you are.” she expressed with a fairly bored affect. Simon was surprised both by the abruptness of her statement and the casualness with which she said it.

“We’ve never talked.” he expressed earnestly as an explanation of why he couldn’t offer her the same understanding.

“Just because you’ve never seen me doesn’t mean I’ve never seen you.” she responded before looking him up and down. “Anyway do you want a pencil or something?” she questioned and Simon shook his head.

“No,” he stated and gave him a confused look.

“Then why else would you talk to me? And I hope your answer is quick because the teacher is coming.” she said lightly gesturing. Simon gave his response quicker than he’d originally intended.

“I think we should be friends.” he said and she gave him a curious look before offering her response.

“Please elaborate after class.” she said before turning back around in her seat. Simon stared back down at his work and tried to focus though his mind kept scrutinizing what he’d said. What was he even doing and what did he hope to gain from it? Being Kayla’s friend knowing that Grace was going to be doing her best to set them up. Moreover, what was the point of any of this in the first place, why had he asked to get set up at all. It was then Simon remembered that he had indeed asked for it, that he wanted to get over Grace and get back to normal.

There was a purpose to all of this and when it was completed he’d be better off. It would take some work but it would be worth it. Class finally concluded and he stood next to Kayla’s desk as she rearranged her items in her bag as preparation for her next class. When she finally finished she looked up to see Simon standing there and looked a little caught off guard by his presence.

“Did I startle you?” Simon asked and Kayla shook her head and muttered something under her breath while averting her eyes.

“I didn’t think you’d actually stay.” she said before looking back to him. “Well, go on, elaborate.” she prodded and now it was Simon’s turn to look a little caught off guard. Right, he was still doing this. He was going to become friends with her and then go to a dance with her and then maybe possibly date her so that he could stop loving Grace. As thoughts about the morality of doing that to someone started to creep into his head Simon shook them away and started on his explanation.

“I think we should be friends,” he began. “There isn’t really anything more to it than that.” he said, attempting to be casual. She raised her eyebrow and began probing him further.

“Why would you want to be friends with me?” she asked. “You already have friends.” she said seriously. Simon waved her off.

“You don’t know that.” he said and she gave him a sarcastic look.

“Grace Monroe, ballet, plus Mark Johnson, lacrosse team, who I think is her boyfriend.” she said matter of factly and Simon practically got a headache at the suggestion that he and Mark were friends.

“I am not friends with him.” he said seriously and Kayla rolled her eyes.

“You’re always hanging out with him, I saw the two of you at lunch.” he explained and at Simon’s surprise she gave a further response. “Yes, I have lunch with you.” she said. “You are also friends with everyone on the robotics team.”

“Well why can’t I have more friends?” he asked and Kayla once again rolled her eyes.

“Can you cut the crap and just tell me what you want?” she questioned seriously and Simon let out a long sigh before answering.

“Do you want to go to homecoming with me?” Simon asked and Kayla looked about as shocked as Simon had ever seen a person. Simon figured that it was easier just to ask her himself anyway. And now he had a personal investment in her answer. Simon figured that having a good time at the dance and with her was the first step to not being in love with Grace anymore and finally untwining his friendships from his romantic feelings. After a long pause Kayla gave a response.

“Why?” she asked and Simon simply shrugged.

“Why not?” he questioned and after another long pause she very quietly gave her answer.

“Okay.” she said before grabbing her back and walking away. Simon couldn’t believe that he’d actually successfully asked a girl out. And Grace was going to be so proud of him when she went to Kayla and tried to ask her to come with them only to find that he’d done it without her help. Of course, now that Simon had a date to the dance that meant he officially had to go to the dance and that meant doing a lot of stuff he hated like shopping and coordinating outfits. At that moment he realized that he didn’t actually have Kayla’s number.

After flagging her down and quickly explaining why he wanted to exchange numbers and the like she did give it to him though there was quite a while of people staring awkwardly at them as they exchanged numbers and Simon mentally groaned as he recognized that he was now going to be the source of gossip at the school for a while. Of course no one here had anything better to do. Later that day as he called Grace with the news she was of course ecstatic about it all.

“See, I told you that you’d make her fall in love!” Grace said excitedly and Simon scoffed.

“I think you’re over exaggerating a bit.” he said. “All she said was that she’d go with me, we’re not exactly planning a wedding.” he responded and Grace simply laughed.

“Not yet, but soon I’m sure.” she said through her own laughter. “Anyway I'm so excited! Grace and Simon on a double date!” she squealed through the phone and Simon suppressed the side of himself that was sickened by the reminder that Mark would be there because this wasn’t about him. It wasn’t about Grace either and if everything went well soon Simon would be able to hate Mark because he was a dick instead of because he was Grace’s boyfriend. Things went fairly smooth planning wise.

Outfits were picked and Simon, never one to care much about the intracties of fancy clothes and the like, just wore the same suit that he wore to everything and mentally hoped that Grace wouldn’t call him out on it even though he knew that she would because she always did. They agreed to meet at Grace’s house because it was the biggest and then they’d take pictures and head off to the dance. When the day finally arrived Simon was the first one there as he always was. Grace didn’t bother to make a dramatic entrance when she saw him which was almost flattering.

He was allowed to peak in even slightly to the world of the real, honest Grace Monroe. She of course looked like the most gorgeous thing that Simon had ever seen and he tried not to stare out of fear that by the end of the night he’d be too in love with her to ever recover. Mark arrived next and he was given the dramatic entrance that Grace loved to do for guests, something which Simon was both cocky about and jealous of. After all, her dramatic entrances may have just been something she did to mirror perfection, but she did them well.

Kayla showed up last. She looked nice in Simon’s opinion, It must've been that her dress matched her eyes or something like that. Simon wasn’t exactly excellent at articulating why something was aesthetically pleasing other than just sheer intuition. It wasn’t the same overwhelming excitement and love he felt when he’d seen Grace but it was still nice. Kayla was still nice. Of course then there were the barrage of photos that every group of parents felt the need to take and so Simon had to stand awkwardly close to Kayla, who he didn’t know very well.

Even worse was that he had to stand awkwardly close to Mark who he knew just well enough to hate with every fiber of his being. Still, as all things the pictures eventually ceased and they were allowed to make their way to the dance via a ride from Pierce. As the group arrived to see the gym all decked out it was obvious that the school had sunk some serious money into the place. Fully catered, well decorated, tons of lights and multiple photo booths were all features of the dance.

“This place is loud.” Kayla said seemingly unimpressed though her true feelings were given away by the slight sparkle in her eyes under the lights which spun and shone through the area in gorgeous patterns.

“Lets dance!” Grace said excitedly to Mark before dragging him away leaving Simon and Kayla alone. Grace shot Simon a wink as she scurried off indicating that it was purposeful because of course it was. Simon looked over to Kayla and the two stood in about as much silence as the could be with a dance going on around them before Simon finally said something.

“Do you want some punch?” he questioned. In all honestly he was just repeating the things he’d seen people say in high school movies and he hoped she wouldn’t notice.

“Sounds good.” she said and so the two found a table and sat down with some punch. After another moment of silence Kayla offered up a question. “You see those lights up there?” she said gesturing. “Do you think they move on hydraulics or manual motor?” she asked, and then as if they’d planned it at the same time both said “Manual motor.” at that moment it was as if a wall between them had been broken down. Then went on like that talking about robots and parts and motors. They gushed about the joy of creation.

It was so enthralling that Simon almost didn’t notice how long Grace had been gone, and when he did get up to find her he was excited to gush about how he was actually having a great time. Having found no sign of her on the dance floor Simon walked over to one of the photo booths with the intention of checking inside, only to see the pictures develop. He hadn't meant to snoop of course but he had and he did confirm that Grace was in the booth, kissing Mark. He honestly felt that he might vomit.

It had been going so well, it had all been going good and now here he was pissed that he wasn’t with Grace again. Resigning himself to being miserable the rest of the evening Simon began to walk back over to his table only to be met up with by Kayla. She took one look at him and before he could even say anything she started.

“Do you want some air?” she asked and he was nodding before he could even think about it. The two sat just outside the school and Simon absorbed the fresh air feeling a bit better than he had a moment ago. “Grace, do you like her?” Kayla questioned and Simon thought about how to answer for a moment.

“It’s complicated.” he settled on and Kayla snorted and laughed in response.

“It’s not that complicated, you either like her or you don’t.” she said and Simon’s mouth moved faster than his brain when he responded.

“Well I like someone else too.” he said and silence engulfed the two of them again. He didn’t know why he’d said that and he didn’t even know if it was true, but it felt like the sort of thing someone should say in that moment.

“Oh,” Kayla responded and the two of them threatened to return to silence again before Simon spoke.

“I didn’t tell you earlier, but you look nice.” he said. She looked at him long and hard for a moment before turning away to look at the sky.

“Thank you.”


	24. The Garden

Things were good for Grace. She was happy. Grace was getting good grades in her class although some of that was definitely thanks to Simon’s help. Every time she tried to thank him he’d always brush her off and mumble something about that being a normal friend thing, so she decided to thank him by being a good friend in return. She’d gained a ton of followers after starting high school, to the point where Grace was sure she’d be verified by the end of the year. And she had a great boyfriend, who she’d kissed. As that thought crossed her mind Grace stumbled slightly and her instructor walked over to her, disappointment in her eyes.

“Grace,” the woman had begun and Grace had internally sighed because she knew where it was going. “You missed a step.” she said and as she went on to lector her Grace simply nodded her head and waited for it to be over.

“It won’t happen again.” she assured and the woman put her head in her hands and sighed.

“You weren’t even listening were you?” she questioned and the surprise must have been apparent on her face as she shook her head and restated what she’d said early. “This is the fourth time this week.” she said seriously. “I selected you to be the lead because I’ve seen you at your best and it’s practically perfection, but this,” she gestured up and down at Grace. “Can’t continue. There are girls who’ve been with the troop longer who I can give this role to if you can’t handle it.” she explained and Grace frantically shook her head.

“No, I can do this! I promise, this is the last time I’ll mess up.” she said nervously. The instructor gave her another look up and down and shook her head tiredly.

“Fine. But one more slip up and you’re being put in the back. This time, I want you to dance like you’re reminding me why I picked you.” she stressed before walking back to the front of the stage to run it again. Grace loved the idea of perfection, she loved the idea of achieving perfection and she knew she was capable of it because she’d done it before and she knew how to do it again. Blocking out all thoughts of everything but the moment she inhabited Grace moved like the music was a part of her.

“You’re safe, for now. Good work Grace.” her instructor had said as practice was concluding. Grace had done well, redeemed herself. Things were good for her and she was happy. She wanted to be happy. But for some reason she wasn’t not really. That was why her mind was on all of the things that should have made her happy during rehearsal instead of on hitting her marks. Grace had messed up, almost lost something very important to her, because she needed to keep reminding herself that she was supposed to be happy.

In truth, Grace wasn’t upset or sad or angry or happy. She was nervous. She felt something, something bad was coming and Grace was completely unaware of what it was and how she was supposed to stop it. That all consuming feeling of dread seemed to follow her everywhere, but especially when she was with Simon, which was weird because he was one of the things that made her happy. And yet whenever she was around him alarm bells went off in her head. It made her feel like one of them was in danger and she was the only one who knew.

Simon wasn’t the only one she’d been feeling a sense of eeriness around however. Recently, being around Mark had made her similarly uneasy. He was also someone who made her happy, and so Grace was tempted to write it off as some random melancholiness surrounding the people she cared for. But this was new. It had started right after the dance in fact. On the ride home when she, Simon, Mark and Kayla had been taken home. Grace was a lot of things but she wasn’t stupid.

She knew that Simon and Mark didn’t really like each other; and she supposed it made a bit of sense. Simon wasn’t exactly a threat to their relationship, but Grace knew that Mark could be like that sometimes. And as for Simon well, they’d known each other forever, he was like a brother to her and vice versa. It made sense to Grace that he was only weary of him because he wanted the best for her and all of that. On that car ride back Mark had said something snide and Grace had expected the typical reaction.

She’d tell him it was rude, Simon would roll his eyes and mutter in French and they’d move on. Except Simon hadn’t done that, in fact he hadn’t even bothered to look over. This wasn’t anything out of the ordinary reality, no cause for concern. Except as the ride went on it quickly dawned on Grace that it wasn’t that Simon refused to acknowledge the comment. It was that he refused to look at her. Grace didn’t want that to be true, she wanted to be imagining it. But that wasn’t the case. Simon wouldn’t look at her for the rest of the night.

When she arrived home and flopped into her bed too tired and distressed to even remove her dress in lieu of pajamas she’d sought out Cleo and recounted the day's events to the very uninterested cat as she wondered why that was. He hadn’t looked at her after she got back from the photo booth, when she’d kissed Mark. Grace wondered if that had something to do with it but couldn’t think of a reason why it could. Still he was mad at her about something, or else why would he go out of his way not to see her.

That had been weeks ago and Simon had long since returned to his normal, amazing self, but the memory still lingered in her mind. Grace considered all of this as she continued to pack up her items as rehearsal concluded, but found that her inner musing was interrupted by conversation from Elisha.

“Are you okay?” Elisha asked and Grace struggled to come up with a satisfying answer. “You tripped up at practice, you never do that.” she said and Grace groaned because she was right and Grace didn’t want to admit that she was secretly terrified her best friend hated her and that her boyfriend had something to do with it even if she couldn’t figure out why. All she wanted was to be in a happy relationship and to have a best friend.

“I’m fine, just a little stressed.” Grace answered as she grabbed her bag and Elisha gave her a look like she didn’t believe a word out of her mouth, likely because she didn’t.

“Why don’t you tell me what’s really going on so that I can help you?” Elisha offered and Grace considered it for a moment before deciding to be slightly vague about it.

“So, I’m just sort of worried that a friend I have might be mad at me about something.” Grace explained and Elisha laughed much to her surprise and chagrin.

“We’re talking about Simon, right?” she asked though it came out as more of a statement of fact than a question.

“I have friends besides Simon.” Grace said indignantly and Elisha laughed at her defensiveness.

“Of course I know that, but I also know that there are only two friends you have who you like enough to stress out about this stuff and since you're talking to me, by process of elimination, it’s Simon.” she said honestly. Grace shrugged and accepted that Elisha was right.

“Fine, you caught me. Any advice.” she questioned and Elisha laughed once again. “Oh you’re just having a ball with my suffering aren’t you?” Grace questioned sarcastically as Elisha gave her answer.

“Grace I’m pretty sure you could run over Simon’s dog and he’d apologize to you.” Elisha explained. Grace looked shocked at what she’d said.

“Don’t talk about Archduke Franz Ferdinand that way, I’d never do that.” she said seriously and Elisha looked at her with a mix of amusement and befuddlement.

“I can’t believe that’s what his dog is named. And anyway that was just an example. My point was Simon thinks you’re great, and probably will think that until the day he dies, so I wouldn’t worry about it.” She explained. Grace looked slightly unconvinced but otherwise allowed herself to relax after their conversation. Things were fine, she was just reading into them. Or at least, things were fine with Simon.

Grace really liked Mark, she liked having a boyfriend and everything that came with it. But at the same time she felt like there was something that he wasn’t telling her, like things between them had been weird since they’d kissed in the photo booth. Grace didn’t want to but she was forced to consider the idea that she was a bad kisser. Though in all honesty she knew that what she was doing was silly and stupid. She should just ask Mark if things were okay and take him at his word.

The next day at lunch as they sat together, alongside Kayla who’d joined their table, and their friend group since the dance which was at least one thing she was grateful to have come out of that day, she spoke to Mark.

“Hey, are you upset with me?” she asked. “It feels like we haven’t done all of the couple things we usually do.” she added in the hopes that it would bring some brevity to the situation. Mark looked at her funny for a second before giving her a kiss, something which did make Grace feel better, though she would have to tell him off for it later. After all, what if a teacher had seen, that sort of stuff was strictly forbidden at the school after all.

“I’m not upset with you.” he said happily and this made Grace feel even better. Things were okay, things were always okay and she was just upsetting herself for nothing. Grace went on the rest of the day like that, attending her classes and being happy and secure in the knowledge that nothing was wrong, and that she didn’t have anything to be upset about. For just a few fleeting hours Grace did believe herself when she said that she was happy.

The last bell of the day rang and Simon was already waiting for her at her locker when she got out. She smiled at him, like she always did, though Simon was looking around slightly nervous, as if someone could jump out at any moment and attack him. Noticing this, Grace put a hand on his shoulder and posed a question.

“Is something wrong?” she asked and Simon smiled back at her for a second before it melted into a soft sad look.

“They’re going to kick my ass for this, but you deserve to know the truth.” he said seriously. Grace raised an eyebrow.

“What do you mean? Who is they and what do I deserve to know?” she questioned. Simon took a deep breath and started.

“I think Mark cheated on you.” he said. Grace felt her mouth dry up as her brain caught up with the words Simon was saying. They couldn’t be true, she refused to let them be true. Grace shook her head.

“What do you mean you think, did he or didn’t he?” she asked seriously and Simon gave his response.

“I can’t prove anything but I heard him and his friends talking about it.” He explained. Grace’s phone buzzed with a text from Mark asking to meet her by the school garden and Grace turned to Simon and sighed.

“I don’t think he would do that. I have to go, let’s talk about this later.” she said as she scurried off to the garden. She didn’t even stop to look back for Simon’s reaction, lest it somehow be convincing enough to change her mind. Arriving at the garden she saw Mark waiting there and something in Grace decided that he hadn’t done anything wrong, though this part of her was ignored. “What’s up?” she asked and Mark looked surprised.

“That little weasel didn’t tell you anything?” he asked confused. Grace looked at him for a minute before responding.

“You mean Simon? Yeah he, he said you cheated on me.” she explained and Mark nodded before giving Grace a serious look.

“I didn’t do it. Listen Grace, you know me, you know I’d never do it. Simon’s hated me from the beginning and he just wants to make me look bad because he wants you to himself.” he added “You believe me, right?” he asked. Grace didn’t believe him not really. Or more aptly she believed Simon more. She’d known Simon longer, known that he was always trying to look out for her. She trusted Simon to tell her the truth. And yet, despite not believing it at all a part of Grace wanted to say yes, that she believed him.

Grace liked being someone’s girlfriend, she liked going to games and having his arm around her and kissing in photo booths. It was perfect, all a part of her perfect high school fantasy. And wouldn’t it be easier that way, to let Simon be the villain, the jealous best friend who tried to break up a happy couple? Wouldn’t it be more perfect that way, make her more perfect. Wasn’t it better to be happy living a fantasy than to face the reality that she got cheated on? That she wasn’t good enough to be loved?

“I don’t believe you.” Grace said seriously. “This is over.” she added before walking away. The car ride back to her house was silent and the air was thick with melancholy in the limo as her parents asked her about school and the like. When she’d gone upstairs the first thing she’d done was to lock her door and to sob into her pillow. Grace held herself and cried because this was her fault, she’d somehow messed up, she hadn’t been good enough. If she had laughed more at his jokes, cheered more at his games, been prettier; maybe then she’d still have a boyfriend.

Grace was so consumed by her sadness that she barely heard the knock on the balcony door and was completely surprised to see Simon there. She sometimes forgot she left a ladder out there, since they most often went out through the bedroom. Grace started to wipe her face but then decided not to bother. If anyone was going to see her at her lowest point it might as well be Simon. Opening the balcony doors Simon’s face changed to worry when he saw her which was fair Grace supposed, she probably looked like a mess.

“Are you okay?” he asked. “You rushed home from school and Pierce came back for me so i was really worried something happened and-” Grace cut him off.

“Simon, is that a black eye?” she questioned. Simon touched his face and winced before nodding.

“Oh, yeah. They made good on their promise.” he explained. At this Grace burst into tears again.

“Great, because I’m a shitty girlfriend I got cheated on and you got beat up!” she said and Simon quickly shook his head.

“Hey, that’s not true and I don’t want to ever hear that again. You are a great best friend and you were probably a great girlfriend too. That guy was a dick but that doesn’t mean anything.” he explained. “You’re still Grace Kathrine Monroe; you’re still perfect.” Grace stared at Simon for a while longer before throwing her arms around him in a hug.

“God you're a good best friend.”


	25. The House

Grace wanted so desperately to be over it, to be over getting cheated on. She wanted to bounce back and return to her bubbly, over-achieving but still approachable personality that had made her so popular at school. But she found that she couldn’t. It had been weeks, multiple conversations with both her parents, girls trips with Elisha, and ice cream binges with Simon later and she was still sad. Of course, at school she still managed to put up a perfected front but she knew the facade wouldn't last.

The official story that her classmates had concocted was that for some unknown reason she had dumped Mark and was living her life. However as her battle with the sadness raged on more and more instances of non-Grace Monroe like behavior had begun appearing at school. Less interest in her hobbies, more moments where she stared off into the middle distance, and awkwardly avoiding questions about the relationship. She’d been able to explain them so far but she knew the rumor mill would soon start again.

She’d been so deep into her sadness that she’d almost forgotten her birthday was coming up. Grace loved her birthday, especially her birthday parties. Every year she’d planned some nice, extravagant one and now that she was in high school she’d had a plan to make this one amazing. Grace had wanted to drop hints about her fabulous party and due to both her previous years events and her popularity everyone would want to go. People would have spent weeks trying to get into her good graces and get an invite.

And then only a few days before the event would come the big reveal. Everyone in the school would be invited, they’d cheer and celebrate and she’d throw the best party ever. And then they’d go home and be secure in the fact that Mark hadn’t affected her at all. They’d know for sure that she’d never really cared about him, that she’d been the best part of their relationship, the only one worth caring about. Grace imagined that the next day at school they’d all look at Mark sadly walking down the hall and think about him.

“He must be a real idiot to lose Grace’s favor.” they’d think. “She was clearly only dating him to be nice.” They’d add. But that wasn’t the truth, and it likely wouldn’t happen. Grace had put so much of herself into that relationship, it had been a part of her plan. She was popular and a lauded dancer and she got good grades, but she didn’t have a boyfriend and so none of it mattered to her. She wasn’t perfect anymore, no longer the complete package. At this point it hurt less to have been cheated on and more to know that she was missing out on something.

And Grace didn’t want to be thinking about any of this, she wanted to be planning her amazing party and being excited to turn fifteen, but she wasn’t sure how much longer she was going to need to get over this. Grace needed some sort of motivation, some light at the end of the tunnel. And because she didn’t have one in reality she made one up for herself.

“I bet if I throw an awesome enough party I’ll get a new boyfriend in no time.” she told herself. “It will be like nothing ever changed.” she said to no one in particular and at that point Grace finally felt that she had something to work towards, a real tangible goal. She just needed to date someone again to feel whole. And what better way than being the most popular girl in her class by having an amazing party. It had to have all of the trappings that a high school party should, rowdiness, a lack of supervision, and of course, the classic trope of spin the bottle.

Grace knew exactly what she’d have to do, a simple party at her exorbitantly big house. Her parents would of course make sure that they had supervision in the form of staff who were being paid extra to make sure that they weren’t doing anything wrong, but she could probably convince them not to be there in the flesh. That combined with good food and tons of classic party games would make for an event that people would be talking about for years no doubt. And it would be a sure fire way to show that she didn’t care at all about her ex.

She would even make this party exclusive, to drive home the status that she had, and the perfection she’d display. Everything was coming together perfectly in Grace’s mind and she couldn’t wait to share her plans with Simon, Elisha, and Kayla who at this point had joined the first two as a member of Grace’s circle who she felt she could trust. Sitting with Simon and Kayla during lunch she was excited to share the news that she’d found a way to fight against the bouts of sadness that she’d been fighting against since the break up.

“I’ve got some great news about my birthday!” Grace announced as she sat down. “The two of you are invited!” she said happily. Simon chuckled.

“Grace, everyone is always invited to your parties.” he reminded her and Grace ignored this comment in favor of continuing to talk about everything that she had planned.

“This one will be different, it’s invite only and not everyone will be invited.” she explained. “We’ll have the whole house to ourselves, minus the staff who is there to babysit, and it’s going to be amazing!” Grace explained. Turning to Kayla she decided to ask a non-Simon opinion on the matter. “What do you think?” she questioned. It was clear Kayla had only been half listening as she shot her head up from her work and struggled for an answer to a question she didn’t have context for.”

“I’m uh, not really a party person.” she muttered and Grace waved off her concern.

“That’s just because you haven’t been to one of mine!” Grace said confidently. “We’re going to have a great time, you’ll see.” she added and likely wanting to steer the conversation away Kayla changed the subject to something else.

“You seem good.” she said having picked up on Grace’s happier demeanor than previous.

“That’s because this party is going to get me a new boyfriend so quick that everyone will forget I even dated Mark in the first place.” she said happily. At this Simon’s brow furrowed and he responded.

“Oh, so you’re already in the market to date someone else?” he questioned and Grace nodded.

“Of course, it’s not like I can stay single forever.” she said. “I mean, you know what they show in high school movies; if you’re not in a relationship then what are you doing?” she asked no one in particular before going back to eating her lunch. After eating for a moment it dawned on Grace what she’d said and she rushed to apologize. “Oh wait, I didn’t mean it like that!” she said to the two of them. “Both of you are great, and don’t need a relationship to be great, I just meant for me.” she said. “I need to be in a relationship.” she added seriously.

Kayla didn’t seem to care and Simon had a look on his face like he wanted desperately to respond but chose not to. Finishing her food Grace continued the rest of lunch uneventfully, talking to her friends, thinking about her party and of course making accidental awkward eye contact with Mark from across the cafeteria. Overall a not very memorable lunch but still good for telling the two of them her plans, and for the favor she asked Kayla and Simon as they were leaving.

“Hey, could the two of you sort of mention that you’re going to my party to people?” she asked. ‘I want to get the word out.” she explained. Both nodded.

“Sure Grace!” Simon said with a level of enthusiasm that made Grace chuckle and Kayla roll her eyes before also agreeing. As she left the lunch room Grace felt prepared for the day that was to come and all of the days that would come after. For the first time in a while Grace felt very secure in her plans and future. And as the news was spread Grace got exactly what she’d hoped for. All news of her breakup was ignored in favor of trying to get invited to the party which had surely become over hyped but she wasn’t going to put a stop to it.

People would offer her favors, answers to homework, the best parts of their lunches all for the chance to get invited, and while Grace never took any of these things, feeling that it would be wrong, she did like feeling valued, like everyone was fighting over her. She secretly wondered if it made her a bad person to want all of this attention but she pushed that thought down it was easy to ignore it than to try and change. Her social media following was blowing up as well with likes in the thousand on posts counting down to her party.

The only thing that she couldn’t stand was choosing who was invited, since her parents wouldn’t be there she was only allowed to invite about twenty kids, which did make her feel awful. Still it would all be worth it for what would surely be the best birthday ever. When the day finally arrived Grace was too excited to sleep the night before, surely this was a party that would go down in legend, becoming more and more mythical as time went on and having events blown up to be much cooler than they were.

As guests arrived Grace looked upon them, outside of Simon, Kayla, and Elisha, everyone else were the elk of their school, the most popular kids to set foot in the building, the most interesting or smart kids, those who Grace thought were the nicest. A specific combination of people who she’d spent a very long time carefully vetting to create an experience of legend. And things had gone amazing from the start. There was an amazingly curated playlist of songs that she’d made herself.

The food was also chosen with allergies and tastes in mind and prepared by their chef for everyone's tastes. People were getting along and talking to each other but most importantly to Grace she was at the center of it all and doing it fabulously. She’d picked out an outfit that while more casual than her usual birthday fare of amazingly extravagant dresses still complemented her as being the best dressed person at the party. Her hair and makeup had been done for this as well and anytime she passed one of her guests they wanted to talk to her about everything.

Even Kayla, for not being a party person as she’d said it seemed to be having a good time, something which Grace wanted to playfully tease her about. As she strolled over to Kayla and Simon he immediately gave her a hug, something which Grace figured she should have expected from Simon but caught her off guard anyway. After he pulled away from the hug Simon fished something out of his pocket and handed it to her.

“Happy birthday!” Simon said happily. “I wanted to give you something,” he added, gesturing to the box. Grace looked at it for a moment and then waved him off.

“It’s not time to open presents yet.” she said happily and Simon scoffed.

“Come on, is Grace Katherine Monroe really going to wait to open a present on her birthday?” he asked and Grace chuckled and gave in opening the gift. Inside was a beautifully framed photo that contained two pictures.The first was the year they’d met and the other was from that year. Grace couldn’t hold back her smile at seeing how far the two had come from so young and small to where they were now.

“I love it Simon, you’re the best friend ever.” she responded and Simon looked sheepish.

“It was nothing.” he responded before his face became a bit more serious and he started to say something. “You know, I’ve been thinking about what you said the other day about dating and I was wondering if I could-” Simon's statement was cut off by another person across the room at the party yelling out that they should play spin the bottle and Grace having to rush over to bribe the workers into not snitching. Before she did however she did address Simon’s statement.

“We’ll talk about it later.” she assured him. “I’ve gotta go deal with this.” she said before running off to do just that. As everything was set up and they all sat around to play Grace couldn’t stop thinking about what Simon had been about to say to her. She’d noticed that Simon had seemed a little off after her comment about needing to get into another relationship but she assumed it was because she’d been rude in implying that he needed one. She knew that Kayla liked him and he’d said he liked her, so Grace didn’t know why they just didn’t date.

Maybe what he’d been going to say had been related to that. Maybe he and Kayla were going to start dating. Grace didn’t know why, but she felt weird at the idea. Then again she figured it was better than the alternative that Simon was about to confess to having feelings for her. That idea also made Grace feel weird, but in a different way. She shoved both of those thoughts down deciding that neither was important. This was her birthday, her day. It wasn’t for Mark or Simon or Kayla or whoever else. She was going to be happy today.

The bottle was spun by some classmate and it landed on her and so she kissed him as everyone clapped and cheered about how he was so lucky to kiss the birthday girl. Grace didn’t really feel anything but she also didn’t feel awful so she considered it a win. She beamed and Grace knew that this would go down as the most important moment in the party. Then Kayla spun the bottle. As it went around in circles a few times it finally stopped and landed on Simon. This was the most important moment of the party.

There was something real and palpable there and everyone could see and feel it. Grace felt like she was seeing something that she wasn’t supposed to just watching it, like she was intruding on some very private moment. It went on for what felt like a probable eternity and when it was finally over it was like it wasn’t even her party any more. Simon started at Kayla with that same blushy awe that he always had on his face and asked her to be his girlfriend. And Kayla looked happier than Grace had ever seen her when she said yes.

She was happy for them, after all Grace had always known they’d make a good couple, a great couple. They had so much in common, and Simon was an awesome best friend so she knew he’d make an awesome boyfriend as well. She had no reason to feel uncomfortable, her party had gone great. Everyone would talk about how awesome it was, how she was totally over Mark, her plan had worked. The guy she’d kissed asked to go out with her and she said yes because what else would she say.

“Hey Grace,” Simon had said, approaching her a bit later. “That’s what I was going to ask you, if it was okay to ask out Kayla at the party. I hope that I didn’t upset you.” he said. Grace gave him a confused look.

“Why would I be upset? Did you forget I'm the reason you talked to her in the first place?” she questioned jokingly. Simon shook his head.

“No, I just didn’t want to take away attention from you on your birthday and-” he began before Grace cut him off.

“Simon, it’s fine, it’s a party.” she added before gesturing to Kayla who was standing alone. “You girlfriend’s waiting for you, go have fun.” she added before walking off towards the guy who she was now dating and knew nothing about. She’d never felt more alone in a room full of people as she did for the rest of her birthday party. Grace wanted to go home even though she was already there.


	26. The Theater

Simon could barely believe that he was in a relationship. Not because he wasn't cut out for one, but because he'd never even thought of being with one. Of course sometimes he had thought about what it would be like to be in a relationship with Grace, but that was all just stupid wish fulfillment. He never imagined that a relationship could be his actual reality and now he was in one. Simon hadn't been sure what to expect after Kayla had said yes to him, he wasn't sure how he was supposed to feel. But he was happy.

Kayla was nice and they got along. Simon had been best friends with Grace for five years and they had basically nothing in common but each other. But Kayla, she got him in a way he felt he hadn't really been gotten before. They studied together, worked on projects together, read books together and voice their opinions. That wasn't stuff that Simon was really used to doing with most other people and now he was doing it with her. Besides that, while she could be outwardly awkward and analytical Kayla was really nice.

The fact that he was having fun, and being happy, and quite enjoying Kayla's presence made Simon feel even more guilty about the origin of his plan to ask her out in the first place. Simon already thought that Kayla was nice and cool after hanging out with her at the dance, he felt like he should want to be in a relationship with her. But there was of course one major roadblock to that. Simon had known for a while that he was in love with Grace Monroe, and he'd known for a while that it likely wouldn't ever go away completely.

He figured the best he could hope for was to turn it from a complete and total all consuming fire to a numb background feeling that he could ignore. But everytime he got close, everytime he started to have a good time and forget about those feelings they popped back up again; they had at that dance. When he'd seen Grace with her boyfriend at the time, kissing him, having a moment with him that Simon knew he'd never have with her he felt something. Jealousy yes, but also resignation.

He really did think that Kayla looked nice that night and Simon wanted to tell himself that the reason he'd said it had been that and nothing more. But he knew that wasn't true. Simon knew that part of the reason he'd said it was because he wanted to get back at the part of himself that was still holding out hope for Grace, that he wanted a distraction from the negative feelings and he was using Kayla for that purpose. He also knew it was deeply wrong, and he didn't want to be doing it. She deserved better than to be a replacement.

But then again, it wasn't like there was nothing there, he did have feelings for her, maybe not as strong as the ones for Grace, but feelings. And Kayla really did seem happy with him. So what was the harm in keeping it up, even if he had only asked her out because he was jealous that Grace kissed that guy at her party. Simon cringed as even his cognitive dissonance was no match for his internal monologue. This was a bad thing he was doing and he knew it. But Grace didn't think of him that way and she never would so dating Kayla seemed easier.

Simon stared at his ceiling contemplating what level of awfulness he was operating on and how to get off of it. He couldn't break up with Kayla, they'd only been together since Grace's party and that was only a few weeks ago. And besides that solution left everyone miserable. In Simon's mind the best solution was to try and ignore his feelings for Grace so that he could be the type of boyfriend Kayla deserved. That probably started with taking her on a real date in Simon's opinion.

Finally stopping his moping in bed Simon climbed out and walked downstairs now with a plan to fix the situation that he had put himself in. As he sat down for breakfast Simon figured that he'd take Kayla to a movie and enjoy spending time with her, and he made himself promise that he absolutely would not think about Grace. It didn't matter if she showed up with her new boyfriend and got engaged she wasn't going to consume his thoughts while on this date. Simon was going to be a good boyfriend.

"Ravi de te voir hors du lit." his father said as Simon poured his bowl of cereal.

"Ne te moque pas de moi mon vieux." he responded tiredly before enjoying his bowl of cereal and taking out his phone to text Kayla painfully slowly. "Can I get a real phone for my next birthday?" Simon asked.

"How old are you? Twelve?" his mother asked joking and Simon rolled his eyes while holding back a laugh.

"Yes mom, I'm twelve and you're seventy-eight." Simon said jokingly. "Anyway can I?" he asked again and his mother ignored this question. Simon sighed and watched as Archduke Franz Ferdinand sat as his feet taking a rest. He got a response from Kayla agreeing to go see a movie and looked up to ask his father something.

"You want a ride to the movies?" he asked before Simon could even pose the question. Simon nodded in response and got up to go get ready for the date. Of course he and Kayla had hung out together after becoming official but that was mostly at each other's houses, this would be real and in public. That meant he had to be better than he typically was. Picking out a nice outfit he got dressed and looked at himself in the mirror. He tied his hair up and chuckled to himself remembering how Grace would bring up when it got longer.

He of course quickly shoved that thought down as he reminded himself that he was not going to think about Grace during this because she wasn't who he was dating or who his focus should be on. His father drove him to Kayla's house and as she climbed into the sad minivan that was his main mode of transportation he smiled and gave her a compliment.

"You look nice." Simon said.

"Thanks, so do you." Kayla responded looking away slightly embarrassed. "What are we going to see?" she asked and Simon thought for a moment before shrugging. They rode up the rest of the way as Kayla talked about what movie she wanted to see and Simon agreed. Paying for their tickets and snacks the two settled into their seats to enjoy the film. As they sat down to watch and Kayla sat next to him Simon felt a palpable sense of joy. He liked this, liked her. Simon was happy being in a relationship.

Sure, he'd been happy before but allowing himself the comfort that came with dating someone rather than the awkwardly tightrope of liking someone was freeing. Even if he wasn't quite sure why, Kayla liked him and he liked her and so they were here together. No complications, no drama, just two people spending time together. The movie was mostly forgettable but the date wasn't and that was because they were there together. They talked about what was occurring quietly and to themselves for their own entertainment.

They shared fist-fulls of popcorn as they joked about how overpriced it all was, and drank sodas that were the result of combinations only two bored teenagers would have come up with. After the movie was over the two walked out of the theater and into the lobby past the few arcade machines that were set up out there and Kayla smiled and pointed at the claw machine.

"How much do you want to bet I can get you something out of there on my first try?" she asked and Simon surveyed the machine for a second before giving an answer.

"I will buy you any candy you want." he said and she eyed him up and down.

"Promise?" she asked suspiciously.

"Scouts honor." he said seriously and Kayla let out a laugh.

"Nice try, but you're not a scout so that means nothing to me." she responded. Simon chuckled and gave a sheepish look.

"Fine, how about Simon's honor then?" he questioned and she nodded.

"Sure, I'll take it on your honor." she responded before going over to the machine and looking over the prizes inside. "Take your pick." she said cockily and Simon scoffed before choosing at random.

"How about that one?" he said gesturing to a stuffed penguin towards the back of the machine and Kayla only laughed as she put a quarter in and grabbed it easily.

"Your reward." she said jokingly as she handed it over. "Why don't you give me something hard next time?" she added as Simon stared at her dumbfounded.

"How did you do that?" he asked and Kayla smirked and gave an explanation.

"Claw machines are just that, machines. And nothing in a machine is wasted. It's all parts working towards one goal, and the goal of the claw machine is to keep you from getting a prize while making it close. Just as you can manipulate one machine into doing another's job without ever changing a part so to can you make the claw machine work for you." she said jokingly with a smirk.

"So basically, you're not going to tell me?" Simon interpolated and Kayla let out a laugh and nodded.

"Not a chance in hell." she said through her own laughter. "I can't have you out there using that trick to impress other girls." she added and Simon pretended to be offended.

"I'll have you know that I am deeply honorable!" he said through his own laughter.

"Then how about that candy?" she questioned and Simon pretended not to have heard.

"I think our ride is coming." he said jokingly trying to change the subject and Kayla smiled at this.

"I'm taking my penguin back then." she asserted, reaching for it. Simon held the thing over his head and stuck out his tongue.

"You can have it if you can reach it." he said teasingly. After trying fruitlessly to grab it Kayla quickly took another approach planting a kiss on his cheek, something which caught Simon so off guard that she was quickly able to grab the plush back. She smiled as the blush quickly consumed Simon's face and Simon prayed she couldn't hear the fact that his heart was now beating in his ears because of it. He did his best to regain his composure and after a second his face returned to it's normal color.

"I don't think I've ever seen a person get that red before." Kayla said teasingly and Simon ignored her comment putting on a fake accusatory tone.

"That was definitely cheating." he said and she stuck her tongue out in return.

"You call it cheating, I call it a cunning strategy to win an unfair battle." she responded before handing the plush back to him. "But, considering I did win it for you I suppose you can have it back." she said. Simon shook his head and offered it back.

"No, it's okay you won it after all." he started before she interrupted to give her reasoning.

"I want you to have it." she said with such earnestness that Simon was once again caught off guard and began blushing. However instead of staring dumbfounded Simon said what he was thinking to her.

"You are so amazing it makes me sad that I didn't talk to you sooner." he said and Kayla turned away embarrassed, a blush barely visible on her darker skin tone.

"That's probably one of the nicest things anyone's ever said to me." she offered up before continuing. "Most of the time I try and blend into the background, I've never really liked being the center of attention. But, for all it's worth, you make me want to come out of my shell more." she said as she slipped her hand into Simon's.

"I really like you." Simon said and he really did mean it. On the car ride back his father questioned the two about what they'd thought about the movie and neither had much of an answer as they'd been far too busy enjoying each other's company. Simon walked Kayla to the door and she gave him another kiss, this time on the lips.

"I had a really great time. I'm glad we're dating." she said as she entered into her house. Simon returned to the car with a renewed sense of excitement over his relationship, and a renewed desire to be a good boyfriend. Kayla was someone who didn't open up to people and she was putting that trust into him. If he messed up now, if he broke her heart, that would make him the scum of the earth. It didn't hit Simon until later that what had occurred was only his second kiss ever, with his first being at the party.

The only other time he'd even come close was years ago with Grace. Simon now cringed at that memory in particular and tried to shove it down. Then again that kiss at the party had also been fueled by petty jealousy and he could tell that it would also be a cringed upon moment in the future. Simon decided that for all intents and purposes he'd count tonight as his first kiss, after his first real date with Kayla, that seemed more appropriate, more like a satisfying conclusion to a movie.

Simon wondered what part of the movie this would be counted as, if he was thinking of his life like a teen drama. He was happy, he had a girlfriend, and Grace had a boyfriend who he assumed she was happy with. He went on a date, had his first kiss, he was well on his way to getting over those pesky feelings that kept dragging out the conflicts in his personal life. Really, this felt like it could be the conclusion, things finally winding down so that everyone got to live happily ever after.

His phone rang on his desk and Simon picked it up to answer Kayla's call. She was working on another robotics project and Simon was happy to give his opinion one what she should do to make it the best that it could be. As they talked Simon got another call, this one from Grace. This, he felt, was the final test of loyalty. Grace was his best friend of five years, he'd known her forever and he would know her forever if he had his way. He wanted to answer so badly, like he always did.

"Are you getting another call?" Kayla asked after a while of ringing. Simon stared at the call just a bit longer and hit ignore.

"No, it's fine. Keep talking."


	27. The Decision

Grace felt like she hadn’t seen Simon in a while. In reality she knew that it probably wasn’t true, she still saw him at lunch, and during their classes together. But going from hanging out everyday after school, and spending practically every weekend together to mostly only seeing each other during school hours was jarring. She didn’t think that Simon was avoiding her or anything, he was just busy. She was busy too, it was normal. Still, Grace felt a bit melancholic over the whole thing.

Or maybe, she was just protecting her feelings on one matter onto a completely unrelated one. In truth, Grace was grappling with herself over the past few days. She remembered what she’d said about needing to be in a relationship, it’d played over and over again in her head and she didn’t know why. That was of course until she’d looked over her list of things that she had to do to have a perfect high school experience again. It was in doing that, that Grace was able to realize what she really wanted.

Grace wanted to be perfect yes but she also wanted to feel whole. And so she sought out all of the high school ideals of dating and parties and social media clout as a way to fill that whole. She felt whole when she was dancing, when she was performing for a crowd. And she needed to chase that, she needed that feeling of being a complete person. So now she was dating that guy from her party who she now knew was named Anthony because she needed to be in a relationship to be whole, at least according to her brain.

He was fine, they didn’t have much in common. They went out on dates and made awkward conversation that he never seemed to know was awkward. It was fine, she didn’t have to feel anything, she just needed to be in a relationship. Grace knew her mind was lying to her, when it told her that she needed to be in a relationship, when it told her that she was missing part of herself without one. She knew that it lied when it tried to convince her that if she just managed to be a little more popular she’d feel fulfilled, she knew all that.

But she couldn’t stop believing it. After all if she did stop, then everything she’d done would have been for nothing. So Grace had to keep caring about popularity more than anything, and had to keep being in a relationship. She was nothing without this. God she missed Simon. If he was there, maybe he’d tell her what she already knew, that she was Grace Monroe before she was popular and that she’d be Grace Monroe after. That she had nothing to prove to anybody, and maybe if she heard it from him she’d believe it.

But Simon was happy right now. In contrast to Grace, who felt like she was coming apart under the weight of her own image, Simon was doing good, great actually. At least from what she saw, and what he told her. He was making a lot of really cool stuff, excelling in his classes like always, he was even still making updates to the silly little book they’d made up all those years ago. And he and Kayla seemed great, better than great. The perfect couple, with everything in common.

She bet that neither of them ever had to worry about long awkward pauses in conversation, bet that neither of them was dating the other because they felt that they had to. That was why Simon was too busy to hang out with her like he used to, he was busy being happy, and in a happy relationship. She figured that if she were smarter she’d follow his example and try to be happy too. But it was much easier to be miserable and popular so she didn’t have to let go of her need for perfection.

Grace Monroe, perfect dancer, perfect student, perfect girlfriend. And she was more alone than she’d ever felt. Maybe she’d call Simon and ask him to come over, and they could talk and laugh. None of it would be awkward or forced. Maybe she’d allow herself, just for a second, to shed the façade of perfection and just be Grace Monroe. She stared at her phone contemplating this before design against it. If she called and he didn’t pick up, she’d just feel worse, and she couldn’t allow that.

Besides, she’d see him the next day at school, when they were in gym class she could talk to him and tell him that she felt awful and Simon would be a good friend and give good advice and she’d take it. Grace already knew that she wanted to break up with her boyfriend, that she wanted to stop caring so much about being perfect and focus on herself. But she needed permission to do it, permission that she couldn’t give herself. Grace just wanted someone, anyone, to tell her that she didn’t have to do this.

That next day Grace did try to tell Simon what she was thinking about, tried to bring it up but she just couldn’t seem to get the words out. She figured it was fair however considering that they were running throughout the class and Simon was hard to keep a conversation while he was practically gasping for air while dying. She knew that after class she’d have a chance to talk to him, they’d do what they always did. She’d tie his tie and they’d talk, Grace liked it. It was one of the best parts of her day.

“Are you ready to go?” Simon questioned as he stepped out of the locker room. Grace stood there for a moment awestruck and in silence. He’d just walked out of the locker room without her tying his tie. This person must have been some sort of evil clone because she knew for sure that Simon would never leave a locker room with his tie untied. He’d practically ranted to her about not wanting to get a detention over an untied tie. It was then that Grace looked down and realization struck her.

“Y-your tie?” she said confused. Simon looked down, thrown off by her confusion.

“What about it?” he asked and Grace was quick with a response to his question.

“It’s tied, and I didn’t tie it!” she said a bit more exclamatory than she’d intended. Simon gave a sheepish look upon reconciling what she meant and offered up his explanation.

“Oh, yeah. Kayla tied it for me.” he stated a bit awkwardly. As he did this Grace’s face fell and she prayed that he wouldn’t notice it as much as she felt it.

“Oh,” she said quietly.

“Yeah I mean, it’s kind of a couple thing so you understand. I bet you get tired of having to tie Alexander's tie all the time.” he said letting out an awkward chuckle.

“Anthony.” Grace quietly corrected. Simon nodded in response.

“Right,” he said equally quietly. The two stood there like that for a moment everything seeming awkward and forced before Simon finally broke the silence. “I’ve got to get to class, but we should double date sometime or something, it feels like we haven’t hung out in a while.” Grace’s mind raced a mile a minute as she tried to figure out all of the seemingly disparate feelings that were manifesting in her. Mostly it was bitterness, or at least what she assumed was bitterness. She didn’t need his pity invitation, she didn’t need his friendship, she didn’t need this.

“See you around Simon.” Grace said coldly as she walked off in the opposite direction. If the feeling that had manifested really had been bitterness that should have satisfied it, blowing off his invitation and cutting off the conversation should have made her feel better, but it didn’t. In fact, Grace felt much worse after all was said and done. It didn’t matter much though, the two of them were in a fight now, at least until she deciphered what was going on that made her feel so weird.

She sat with a group of other popular kids who she didn’t know that well at lunch. It was easier than having to sit with Simon and Kayla with all of the fresh emotions brewing inside of her. Grace stared at the two of them and did her best to try and comprehend exactly what had upset her about their previous conversation. At first she thought it had been Simon’s pity invitation on a double date but it had come before that. It had come when he mentioned that Kayla tied his tie.

Grace didn’t know what that had upset her, nothing about it should have been upsetting. She was his girlfriend so she tied his tie. Grace knew it was a thing a lot of couples did, she did it for Mark and if he asked she’d do it for Anthony. Still, it upset her and she couldn't make it not upset her. She tied Simon’s tie, she always did. The two of them hung out after school, they always did and now he hung out with Kayla. Everything that they’d done together seemed to have become a part of girlfriend duties and Grace kind of wished he wasn’t dating Kayla.

It was with that thought that everything clicked into place with Grace, she was jealous. Jealous of what exactly she wasn’t sure. Maybe she was jealous that the two of them were in a happy supportive relationship and she could barely remember the name of the guy she was dating. Maybe she was jealous that Kayla and Simon seemed to be even closer than the two of them, and she felt like she was losing her best friend. Maybe she wanted to be the one dating Simon.

Grace almost let out a laugh at that last idea because it was so far fetched. She was fairly sure that she didn’t nor would she ever want to date Simon. After all, why would she? Sure he was a great friend who was always there for her, and sure he was one of the few people she felt truly comfortable around and sure she liked hugging him, and thought he was kind of cute, and wasn’t opposed to the idea of kissing him-. Grace wanted to let out a loud annoyed groan at her own brain as she realized that it was the last one.

Despite all reason and common sense pointing against it, she wanted to date Simon Laurent. And of course she discovered this at the worst possible time. She couldn’t date Simon because both of them were in relationships, people would get hurt. And moreover considering the fact that he had a girlfriend who he’d asked her to set him up with Grace was also pretty sure Simon didn’t feel that way about her. All that there really was to do in that situation was to suffer in silence. After all, Grace wasn’t in the market of getting hurt.

She then realized that thanks to her own confusion she was now technically in a fight with Simon, after all, the universal symbol for being in a fight is changing lunch tables. Grace Monroe had a crush on her best friend and she couldn’t even hang out with him because she was supposed to be mad. Then again, maybe that was for the best. Grace knew that she was a good person, and that she’d never try and ruin someone else’s relationship, but having to be around the most perfect couple in the world might have driven her insane.

Maybe this fight was just the cover that she needed to sort through her own feelings and then she could return to the friendship when everything was sorted. Grace had been looking for permission to stop caring so much and maybe this could be it. Now she had another task outside of trying to be the most impossibly perfect person in the world. Grace had feelings to sort out. It also gave her an excuse to break up with her boyfriend, and to avoid other relationships for a while. She was doing a noble thing by keeping others out of it.

And so Grace crafted a plan. She’d keep being in a fight with Simon for a while, just to avoid him and Kayla. She would take a step back from striving for popularity in school and online, and tell people she was trying to focus on herself. Meanwhile she would throw herself back into her passions and come out the other side a more complete, whole person. And through doing this she would figure out what to do about the Simon situation and how to avoid the landmines laid out for her. Then maybe she could return to their friendship with everything as it should be.

The first step was to break up with Anthony and while Grace was looking forward to no longer being in an unfulfilling relationship she wasn’t looking forward to actually breaking up with him, for nothing if not that fact that he really hadn’t done anything wrong except not be the right person for her. She forewent the typical sad speech and told him honestly that she didn’t really see their relationship going anyway while apologizing profusely. While he was a bit upset Anthony was quite nice about the whole thing, and said he understood.

Next was obviously a break from social media and the constant rat race for popularity that Grace found herself participating in. While a part of her wanted to post one of those dramatic logging off messages she figured that it would only feed into her wanting to show off a performative version of herself for others. She simply quietly logged out and explained it to others when asked in person. She continued actively avoiding Simon which wasn’t fun but was for the best as she figured it. She was unhappy, but she was also doing the right thing, protecting him.

Next of course was to throw herself back into her passions. Grace picked up the violin again though it had been awhile since she played. And she enjoyed it, even if she was rusty. She let others here if they asked and tried not to worry about how she sounded. Grace danced more than she had in a long time, focusing not on perfection, but on getting just a bit better each time, on growth rather than being the best. It brought back so much of the joy she’d lost in her movements previously. Even her instructor commented positively on the improvement.

But even as she got better, even as she stepped back, even as she improved Grace still found herself unable to work through her feelings for Simon. She still liked him, she wanted to be with him, even though she wanted even more not to get hurt or to hurt anyone. The idea of every possible negative outcome constantly surrounded her, and Grace started to see it from a different perspective. She was happy right now, so was Simon. Both of them were thriving, reaching new strides. Grace loved Simon and in a way she knew he loved her.

It hurt to be apart from someone she’d known for so long, but if both of them were so much better without each other wouldn’t it be wrong to try and change that, to not make their fight permanent. Grace hit a beautiful en pointe and her instructor applauded. As she took a deep bow Grace reasoned with herself, friends drifted apart all of the time, how was this any different. As Grace rose from her bow a decision had been reached, she and Simon were no longer friends.


	28. The Funeral

Simon was having a shitty day. In fact, he was having a pretty shitty week. For one, his best friend in the world, his best friend since they were ten, seemed to have decided he was no longer worth her time. In gym she ran up ahead so that she didn't have to interact with him, and switched teams so that she didn’t have to see him. In French she’d avoid him like the plague, she even switched seats. And she hadn’t sat with him at lunch in almost a month. Simon wasn’t stupid, he knew the signs of a fight.

He just had absolutely no clue what they could possibly be in a fight about. Looking back at the last conversation they’d had he couldn't find anything objectionable. Sure, it had been a little awkward. Simon still couldn’t stand to hear or think about Grace in a relationship even though he knew it was selfish. He brought up Kayla to avoid that thought, that jealousy. And then Grace had left, and he’d thought everything was fine, why wouldn’t it be. But that had been over a month ago, and they hadn’t talked since then.

He missed her, he missed his best friend, but Simon didn't want to intrude. If Grace was mad at him, maybe it was better to leave her alone for a while. But as time had passed Simon simply couldn’t stand not being able to talk to her about things. He wanted to hang and watch movies and gush about all of the random stuff that they always talked about, like they used to. Hanging out with Kayla was of course a main focus, she was his girlfriend. But that didn't mean he didn’t still need his best friend. He’d broken earlier in the week and tried to talk to Grace at her locker.

“Hey Grace! I feel like I haven’t seen you in a while.” Simon said quietly as he stood next to her. He didn’t know why this felt so awkward. He used to wait for Grace at her locker everyday. They used to go over each other's houses everyday. Sophomore year was only a few months in and yet the simplicity of Freshman year felt almost a lifetime away in comparison. Grace was seemingly caught off guard and stared at him awkwardly for a moment before responding.

“Oh, hey Simon.” she said bluntly. There was no malice in her voice, at least none that Simon could detect. Just a sort of uninterested detachment. She was bored of this conversation, she was bored of him. At least, that’s what Simon took from it. Still, he didn’t want that to be true. He pressed on with the conversation, even if it felt like a doomed affair.

“How have you been lately?” he asked earnestly. Grace closed her locker but continued staring at it as if it was open, refusing to look at him. Part of him assumed the worst, he wasn’t even worth looking at in her eyes, she was completely and totally uninterested in even seeing him for a second. But there was something else there, something in the way she held onto the locker door as if to keep herself stable. She wasn’t looking at him because it hurt too much, it was too painful to see him. Whatever had brought their friendship to this point, it had hurt her.

“I’ve been fine.” she said quickly, clearly trying to look for an out to end the conversation. But Simon hadn’t spent five years of his life being Grace Monroe’s best friend to leave this locker without at the very least an answer to why they were apparently no longer speaking. Taking a deep breathe he asked what he’d come here to ask.

“Why are you ignoring me?” he questioned. Simon did his best to make the question sound merely concerned rather than defensive, though he still feared that was how it had come out anyway. Grace still didn’t look at him when she gave a response.

“Simon, what are you talking about, I’m not ignoring you. I’m just living my life.” she said matter of factly. He couldn’t help but notice that her grip on the locker door tightened as she said it. Her own line of defense as much as his words were to Simon.

“That’s a lie Grace, you were living your life before and I was a part of it. I just want the truth about why I can’t be now.” Simon said. That seemed to spark something in Grace, she let go of the locker and finally turned to face him. It felt like it had been ages since he’d seen Grace’s face. Of course, he saw her in classes and in pictures, but it felt like too long since he’d really seen her. She still had those same sparkling brown eyes, that same beautiful face. Simon ignored that feeling he still got in his chest from looking at her, because of how exasperated she seemingly was.

“Simon,” she began with a long sigh. “I’m happy right now.” she explained. “Are you happy right now?” she asked. Simon opened his mouth before closing it and starting again with a newly formulated answer.

“I’d be happier if I had my best friend back.” he said and Grace sighed again and put her head in her hands.

“That's not what I asked. Are you, with your great grades, and robotics awards, and awesome girlfriend, happy?” she asked. It was a trap and Simon knew it because the only correct answer was yes. Other than this, Simon was happy. Saying no would have been a lie and it would have been a lie that made it seem like nothing could make him happy outside of Grace Monroe. Outside of being untrue, it would have been creepy if it was, the idea that he could have so much and still only care about her. What did that say to the other people in his life?

“Yeah, I’m happy.” Simon admitted after a while. Grace’s face softened a bit from exasperation to a soft sad smile. His heart swelled getting to see that smile again and it broke knowing the context of it.

“Then go be happy.” she said her eyes once again averted from him. Grace shrugged her book bag over her shoulder and walked off down the hallway, towards her ride. The ride that they would have been headed for together last year, to spend the rest of the day hanging out. Simon watched Grace walk away and saw the end of five years of the best relationship in his life and called out to her as she made her way towards an exit.

“So that’s it then?” he said a little louder and more desperate than he’d anticipated. He could feel a few eyes turning to look at him as he said it and he tried not to care, zeroing in only on Grace’s response only wanting to hear something, anything that confirmed that this really was the end of being best friends with her. He didn’t even get that satisfaction however. Grace looked back at him and shot him that same sad smile that broke his heart now and nodded. And then she was gone, off to the limo, off to her home. Leaving him behind.

So that already would have made the week pretty shitty. But that had happened on Tuesday and today was Thursday. And Archduke Franz Ferdinand was dead. Simon knew that this happened, that dogs got old and passed away. He knew the lifespan of his breed of dog, knew that his parents had gotten the dog before even he was born. Simon knew that his dog was getting older, and slower. He saw that he was less energetic than he used to be, laying at his feet as he worked and not running around for attention like he used to.

But he still wasn’t ready to wake up and find out that he’d passed away during the night. Still wasn’t prepared to have something that was such a big part of his life gone. God it felt like losing two friends in one week and Simon couldn’t take it. He woke up that Thursday and ran to get his parents and when it was clear that Archduke Franz Ferdinand was well and truly gone, he cried. Simon remembered that when he was younger his mom would call him sensitive, and how other kids would tease him for being a crybaby.

He grew out of it as he got older, but the sheer amount of tears, the uncontrollable nature of them brought him back to that time. A scared little kid who had no idea what he was doing, who felt well and truly alone in the world. He hadn’t cried over losing Grace’s friendship, but it was almost cathartic, through these tears he was also able to mourn that death as well. Of course, he couldn’t stay upset all day. He had school, classes to go to. His father offered to let him stay home but wallowing in the sadness wouldn’t end it.

He and his parents agreed before he left to gold a funeral when he returned home. That day at school was hell. He couldn’t focus on anything and he felt like absolute shit. It was times like these when he wanted more than anything to just talk to Grace and commiserate to talk to his best friend about everything. But he didn’t have a best friend anymore, she’d made that patently clear. At the very least, he did have Kayla who clocked that something was wrong, almost immediately.

“I’m fine.” Simon had said in response to her question about if he was alright. She gave him that same analytical once over that she’d given him when he’d first talked to her, like she was trying to suss out his true intentions through appearance alone.

“You’re lying.” she said matter of factly before softening a bit. “Simon, it’s okay to be upset about this. I’ve never had a pet, but I assume it’s something like losing a dear friend.” she said earnestly. At this Simon too softened and became a little more honest.

“Okay, it’s less that I’m fine and more that I kind of already got all my tears out this morning.” he said sheepishly. Kayla nodded understandably before giving him a hug.

“Well, you’ve got me.” she said and Simon nodded before proposing something.

“We’re having kind of a funeral after school, and I know it’s not exactly the most normal thing but-” Simon began. Kayla already knew what he was about to say and gave her response.

“Of course I’ll be there Simon. I want to be there for you with this stuff.” she explained and Simon nodded gratefully.

“Thanks.” he responded earnestly. Thinking about inviting people to the funeral of course forced him to think once again about Grace. Had they still been friends, he would have invited her. After all, she had plenty of memories of Archduke Franz Ferdinand. She too had known the joys of throwing peperoni at him and watching him run around like a maniac. Maybe he should invite her, just as a courtesy. Simon went back and forth with himself over it all day, wondering if it would be overstepping. After all it had barely been two days since she ended their friendship.

Still, he felt like it would be right. Ultimately Simon decided on leaving a note on her locker explaining the entire thing. It was fairly simple, just a note saying that he’d passed away and saying there would be a funeral after school. He’d ended it with, “I know we’re not friends, so do whatever you want. I just felt like you should know.” He hoped that it didn’t make it seem as though he was pressuring her. The last thing that Simon wanted during this day was to get into a conflict with Grace.

The time rolled around and Simon went home a mournful silence in the air during the quiet car ride home. Throwing his bag in his room Simon contemplated if he should put on a suit or something. On the one hand, they were only going to the backyard. But on the other it felt like it would be respectful. And maybe it was a little over dramatic to do this all for a dog, but it’s different when it’s your dog, when it’s your family. Simon put on a black outfit and noticing that it had started to rain grabbed an umbrella.

With the weather matching his mood Simon walked through the sliding glass door to where Archduke Franz Ferdinand had been buried while he was at school. A marker had been made for the grave and his parents were already there, seemingly having also decided to wear black for the somber event. Kayla showed up soon after, wearing a black dress along with an umbrella of her own. Looking her up and down Simon managed to find a bit of joy in the awful day.

“You look nice.” he said. Kayla nodded.

“Thanks,” she responded. “Are we going to start soon?” she questioned. Simon realized that everyone was waiting for him to give the go ahead and conclude the event. There was no reason for him not to and yet, he couldn’t bring himself to. Simon looked over at the street and waited for something, someone.

“Simon?” Kayla questioned and Simon realized he must have been staring at that street for longer than he had realized. And no one was there. Giving a final sigh Simon turned to finally commence the funeral before seeing a figure wearing black from the corner of his eye. Whipping around he and Grace locked eyes and for a second time was frozen. Both waiting for the other to make a move, to change the way that things were. And then, umbrella in hand Grace retreated back to her car, and disappeared.

Simon wanted to call out to her, to tell her to come back, wanted to beg her to stay. Instead he took a somber sigh and turned back to the rest of his group and started the funeral. It was fine, nothing inspirational. Remarks were made about what a good boy he had been, and about how he would be sorely missed. And after they’d gone inside and eaten subpar pizza that had been ordered five minutes before the event had started. Simon was still soaking wet from the rain and chose not to say much. Kayla clearly wanted to ask him something but seemed to not know how to bring it up. Noticing it Simon decided to take the initiative and bring it up himself.

“Is everything okay?” he asked and Kayla seemed surprised when he addressed her. She did give her answer however.

“That girl who you were staring at, was that Grace?” she questioned. “I didn’t get a good look.” she clarified. Simon thought for a moment before giving an answer.

“Yeah, that was Grace.” he responded.

“Oh.” Kayla said before adding something quietly. “Is, is there something I need to know?” she asked sadly. Simon didn’t think at all before giving another answer.

“Not at all.” he said, giving her hand a squeeze. “You don’t need to think about it at all.” he added, and it was as much reassurance for him as it was for her.


	29. The Contact

Grace Monroe was happy, very happy. She was popular, but it wasn’t her main focus. Her main focus was herself, enjoying herself and all of the talents that she had. Grace Monroe was on top and she was proud of it. She was doing well in her classes, she was performing amazingly in her ballet troupe, and as her sophomore year was more than halfway complete all she could think about was the upcoming summer. She would be traveling abroad as a sort of mentee to a highly respected troup. Things were looking well for Grace.

Still, before any of that could happen the school year still needed to end and it was january. The end of next month would bring her birthday and after that Simon’s. She hated the fact that she was thinking about it so much but how could she help it. Her birthday last year had been the beginning of the end for their friendship. Her birthday this year would be the first without him. Maybe she wouldn’t even have a party, instead electing for the typical dinner with her parents, but it wouldn't be fair to her other friends.

She had more important things to consider than Simon after all. She wasn’t in his french class anymore, he’d been moved up several levels. Grace had always known that Simon was way too smart to be in the entry level class with her, and she’d assumed he stayed out of pity for her. Of course, now that they weren’t friends that pity had been exhausted. That was good, it was for the best. The fact that he was now in the correct class was emblematic of something greater. Simon was where he should have been all along. 

He had held himself back for her and she’d been guilty of the same, but not any more. They didn’t have gym together either. At the beginning of Freshman year she’d been informed that because she particapted in ballet year-round she could forgo a gym class. Of course she’d taken one anyway, and she and Simon were in it together. She’d taken it sophomore year too, but as it went on and it became clear what needed to happen Grace had held off on leaving, that same nostalgia holding her back.

Of course, that had also changed as she transferred from that too. Grace would no longer hold herself back for the sake of friendship, even Simon’s friendship. She was Grace Kathrine Monroe and as much as she hated to admit it she’d let one person define her life for far too long, even if she did love that person in a way. Grace hadn’t felt like her own person and that was why the separation had started even though it was supposed to be temporary. She needed to find herself, even if it meant leaving him for a while.

And Simon was finding himself too, evidently. She never saw him and Kayla at lunch anymore and she figured they both forewent it in favor of the library. They were both very highly ranked students according to the board that was posted in the front hallway, and she wondered if they were in a competition over it. It did fit both of their personalities. Grace had always considered the idea that Simon and Kayla were perfect for each other. They got each other in ways that no one else really seemed to. 

She could imagine them quizzing each other in the library and eagerly checking the weekly rankings. They were both members of the robotics team which regularly brought home prizes for the school as well. They were an unstoppable team and Grace was proud of them even from a distance. She didn’t have any problem with Kayla even though she figured it would have been more in the tradition if she did. When Grace had first realized that she had feelings for Simon she’d had a very selfish thought.

Grace had almost wished that she could catch Kayla doing something awful, like cheating or the like. That way she could hate her and follow the laid out script of saving Simon from a toxic awful girlfriend. Since then of course Grace had grown quite a bit. She didn’t hate Kayla even a little, they had differing interests but so had she and Simon. No, Kayla was a perfectly nice person so Grace had to stay away from Simon. She wasn’t going to hurt a nice person over this. She was proud of both of them excelling.

Grace hung out a lot more with Elisha which was funny to her, after all she’d known her longer then Simon. But he’d long overshadowed a lot of her other relationships with Elisha being relegated to being seen only every once and a while. Now that she could be more egalitarian in her friendships Grace found that she’d been missing a lot. So many of the people she knew had been cursed to be secondary friends when they deserved better. So she was giving them better, the time and attention that they deserved.

So there was all of that. Grace was happy, Simon was happy, Kayla was happy. Everything was perfect, and why wouldn't it be? And yet Grace still couldn’t stop thinking about the funeral. She hadn’t meant to go, she knew that she shouldn't have gone. She knew that it would only complicate things. But she couldn’t help herself. She was just going to stop by and give condolences, she shouldn’t have even done that, but it had been the plan. And of course even that had failed.

She’d locked eyes with Simon, or at least she was pretty sure it was Simon, and they’d just stared at each other. She could tell the service had already started, that she was interrupting. She could tell by that look in his eyes that he wanted her to go and not come back, and so she did. She had been so stupid think that he actually wanted her there, that the invitation wasn’t just a curtsy. That day flashed in her mind continuously despite the fact that she didn’t want it to. The way she’d found the note on her locker and read it twice.

The little feeling in her stomach that was a combination of sadness and something else, excitement that he was thinking of her, that he would think of her. How she’d battled with herself over what she should do, understanding that it was probably just going to hurt more to see him but wanting to do it anyway. Losing a friend was a lot like a breakup in that despite the fact that you’ll want to see them, actually doing it would be a disaster. But she’d been invited so she told herself that it would be rude not to come.

Of course Grace also didn’t know what she was supposed to wear to the funeral of a beloved family dog. Her mind told her that knowing Simon black was probably the way to go, but she couldn’t be sure and Grace didn’t want to arrive over dressed. The temptation to text Simon was also real and palpable, justified by the idea that she would be right to check with him as he was the host of the event, though that temptation was pushed down. She’d arrived in black and luckily had a matching umbrella.

That was of course when she and Simon had locked eyes, but just before that, as she’d first stood outside of the limo, umbrella obscuring her face, she got an unfiltered glimpse at everyone. Simon’s parents together at the front, Simon and Kayla behind them, the two holding hands. She didn’t see his face and Grace didn’t want to. She didn’t want to see the eyes she’d spent way too long staring into, the mouth that she had almost kissed. Grace knew she shouldn’t have been there, and she felt like an awful person for trying.

Had she been luckier Grace would’ve been able to slip out unnoticed by everyone, simply turn around and leave as if she’d never been there. But the fates were cruel that afternoon and he had turned to see her, she’d been forced to confront that face she missed so much. She was far enough away that many of the finer details weren’t present and that was good. Grace didn’t know if she could have handled seeing her former best friend up close. But she was still close enough to see those eyes, the eyes that she felt told her to turn back.

The eyes that reminded her that she’d made her choice, and that informed her that it was too late to turn back. Dwelling on the past would only hurt her more, and Grace didn’t know why she insisted on continuing to try and hurt herself and others. It was wrong, and she was wrong for ever thinking that it was okay, that it could be okay. And now she laid in bed and contemplated what she was going to do moving forward. She had to move on, to rip that bandaid off and look towards the future.

But she wanted one last conversation with Simon first, one last bookend before she quit cold turkey just to spill everything she felt. Of course she couldn't have a real conversation with him, just the mere thought made Grace nervous. But that didn’t mean she couldn't simulate the idea of what that might have looked like. All she had to do was send messages that she knew would never reach him. Switching her phone to airplane mode Grace rolled over and began texting Simon. 

“Hey,” she began. It was a very simple opening for a reason. Just in case she’d somehow forgotten to switch her phone correctly and the message went through, Grace would be safe from any damage, and would be easily able to brush it off as having been for another person. She let out a sigh of relief as the red “Message not delivered” icon appeared before continuing. “Simon I have to tell you something.” The next message said. “I love you, as a friend and as more than that.” the following one added.

It would have been a bombshell had it actually been delivered. Grace continued getting everything out of her system that she needed to air out. “I don’t know ho wlong I’ve had feelings for you, but I do, and it’s torture because I know you don’t feel the same.” the next message, a longer one added. “That’s the reason I keep avoiding you, I don’t want to make things weird.” a shorter follow up added. “But i miss you so much it’s insane.” the next one continued. “I miss everything about you.” Grace typed next.

“I miss talking to you about my day, and about everything else. I miss that we were always there for each other. I miss reminding each other of everything we could be. I miss us.” Grace added after. “I know that you’ll never see any of this, so it’s really stupid, but I’m tearing up right now.” Grace said and it was true as she could feel the tears welling up in her eyes at the thought that this was the closest thing to a conversation with her best friend that she’d ever have again. “I saw how you looked at me at the funeral, I know you don’t want me around.” she added.

“But I really can’t help any of this, I can’t help missing you any more than I can help breathing.” the next message said. “Since this is the end, I guess it’s okay to say this to you.” Grace added after her last message, wanted to wrap up her fictional conversation. “I love you.” was the next message, but not quite the final one. “Good night Simon.” Grace concluded before deleting all of the messages, none of which had been sent, and taking her phone off of airplane mode. She turned her phone all the way off and rolled over on her side.

Unable to control it any further, Grace burst into tears and quietly cried into her pillow weighed down by the knowledge that Simon would never hear what she wanted to say to him, would never feel for her the way that she felt for him. That she had talked to herself because she missed him so much, while he was no doubt completely apathetic of her existence. To her own mind Grace Monroe was a pathetic wreck. But there was a reason for the experience that she’d just had.

She may have ensured that she no longer saw him in school, but Grace was still holding onto a piece of Simon, a piece that as long as she kept it would ensure that she could never move on past this painful event. Grace still had Simon’s number saved in her contacts. And she knew that as long as she did that temptation to call or text him, would always be there. The only way to ensure that this pain ended was to ensure that there was no way for her to talk to Simon. She had texted him because she needed to say goodbye before she did what she had to do.

Turning her phone back on Grace navigated through her contacts until she found Simon’s. She looked at that photo of him that was saved as his profile picture in her phone. It was from so long ago that it almost made her laugh. The little boy who was representative of Simon wasn’t very much like the person he was now. But there was still something there, something in the look that he was giving her when she took the photo that was well and truly Simon. He was still there. In that photo. Grace hit delete contact and then he wasn’t anymore.

No more Simon saved in her phone. Even if she wanted to contact him now she couldn’t, she had cut herself off. And it was the right thing to do. Even if she was sad she was also happy, all of the amazing things that were occuring in her life were still occuring. She still had great friends and great opportunities. The only difference was that she had no Simon. And while it was sad, it was a sadness that she would get over, that she’d have to get over. Simon was surely over oit and soon she’d be too.

It would be like those five years of best friendship had never happened. And yes it was terrifying, but it was also wonderful to Grace in a way, she was navigating uncharted territory and now she had no achor to the past. Grace was going to be happy and better because she was determined to be and she was shockingly stubborn, too stubborn to not do what she set her mind to. A sigh of relief had escaped her when she deleted the contact and Grace knew why. She didn’t have Simon, but in a way she’d gained freedom from it. And she loved it.


	30. The Picnic

It was his birthday and Simon hated it. He hated it because it was his birthday meaning that it was the only day where he could justify thinking about himself and blocking out all other worries and concerns but he couldn't, He couldn't because he was thinking about Grace Monroe. Of course, Simon had anticipated that he would be thinking about Grace around this time after all her birthday was only a few weeks before his and they'd spent so many birthdays together. He knew he'd be thinking about her.

But having the day arrive, Grace's birthday, and knowing that whatever she was doing he wasn't a part of it, that realization had hit Simon like a ton of bricks. He didn't have anywhere to go or anything to do on that fateful Saturday and so he was left with nothing but that sinking feeling of not being able to be with her. Grace was sixteen, he remembered how she'd gushed about those cheesy made for TV movies and shows that espoused the glory of turning sixteen. She was probably having some amazing gala without him.

Even though Simon never really bought into the idea of one birthday being of any real importance, especially one that didn't come with any increased privileges under the law, he was excited because Grace had been excited. Besides, he could never help himself from imagining Grace throwing that big huge party, with a gorgeous dress and him getting to dance with her. It would be her big moment, everyone's eyes watching, knowing she was the most beautiful girl in the room, and he'd get to dance with her. 

Of course those fantasy's were firmly rooted in the past for several reasons. The most glaring being the idea of dancing with Grace, someone who he'd firmly established as the most beautiful girl in the room fell apart with the memory that he had a lovely girlfriend. Not to mention the fact that Grace probably couldn't stand him for reasons that he'd accepted he would probably never know. Teenager stuff he supposed. And anyway he'd been doing so well with his not thinking about Grace constantly crusade.

After whatever had happened at the funeral, another thing he didn't want to think about, he'd realized that Grace was simply not going to be in his life. He didn't like it, he didn't want it to be true, but it was just a fact. And then of course he'd had his backslide on her birthday, where he'd spent practically the entire day thinking about her and about what she was doing. The temptation to sit there refreshing her social media page all day was strong enough that he considered throwing his phone out of the window.

But instead he´d refreshed it once and then went for an hour long jog to distract himself. When the day had ended he did check but unlike previous years Grace hadn't posted anything showing off what her party had been that year, just a photo of her and her parents at dinner. Even though he hated the fact that he felt that way, Simon couldn't help but be a little happy at the idea that she´d canceled a party that year because she didn't want to have one without him. Maybe she did still think about him more than anticipated.

Of course, this came crashing down when she was tagged in and later posted pictures of her and some friends at a concert the next day. Simon felt really stupid after all that, after all, why would Grace of all people miss the opprtinty to throw a party. He wasn't the center of her universe, he wasn't even a factor. He needed to stop trying to center himself and let her live her own life, especially because he was living his own life. And then Simon was good again, for a few weeks he was back to not thinking about Grace.

And then it was his birthday. It had started off completely fine mind you, he'd had his birthday breakfast and gotten in the car to go to school and it should have been fine, that should have been typical. But of course he overheard something he wasn't supposed to hear at the beginning of that day. Back when he and Grace were friends they'd carpool together but since that had stopped his father gave him a ride. But the thing about being friends with someone for so long is that your parents get close, and they keep talking when things end.

So his father, not out of spite or sarcasm had been making small talk that morning on the ride up to school and Simon had only really been half listening, more engrossed in his music and in the fact that he was actually sixteen years old which despite having no legal significance still did hold a feeling of real weight. Closer to being an adult that he ever had been, at the age that movies highlighted as important. Thinking about what he'd maybe do today as a celebration outside of birthday breakfast. 

¨Le temps se réchauffe.¨ his father mentioned off handedly and Simon responded half heartedly, still wondering if maybe he'd go out with Kayla for the day.

¨Je n'avais pas vraiment remarqué.¨ Simon said in response and maybe on another day that would have been the end of the conversation, but it wasn't that day.

¨Got any big plans for the summer?¨ his dad asked and Simon shook his head.

¨I´ll probably work on some more projects for the robotics team, start thinking about the SATs and stuff. Why do you ask?¨ he questioned and his father presented him with an answer.

¨Well I was talking to Howard err- Mr Monroe, and he was telling me about Grace´s plans for the summer and how traveling as a teenager can get them life experience and all that.¨ his father said. Simon had never felt a pit form in his stomach as quickly as it had in that moment even though it really shouldn't have. Still, it was whiplash to hear about Grace unexpectedly and his mind began to race faster than he could control it as he questioned what her summer plans could possibly be and where she was traveling to.

¨Oh.¨ was all Simon managed to successfully get out. Seemingly unaware of the total mental freakout his son was having his father continued.

¨Yeah she's going to do some ballet thing where she travels and performs across Europe all summer, and you know me and your mom can't exactly afford to send you to Italy but maybe you'd like to do something like that?¨ he questioned. Simon was too wrapped up in his own thoughts to even think about giving his father an answer. Grace would be gone all summer traveling and dancing. Grace would be gone all summer living her dream and being her best self. She'd be gone all summer forgetting about him.

¨Simon, are you still with me buddy?” his dad asked and Simon nodded emptily while unbuckling his seatbelt and numbly climbing out of the car walking towards the school. He'd always known that Grace was an amazing dancer, poised and confident. He'd always known that she'd go on and do something amazing, be something amazing. And a part of him always knew that she'd do it without him by her side. He just hadn't expected it so soon. Simon had believed that even if they weren't friends he still had a bit longer to at least see her.

But she'd be gone all this summer and a part of Simon told him that he ought to get used to seeing her from behind a phone screen. Even when she did come back, that was if she came back and didn't get picked up by the company to become the world's youngest international ballerina, he was sure that she would have netted a ton of acclaim and fans. If he saw her in person no doubt she´d be swarmed by admiring fans not unlike the ones she had now, but even more numerous. She really was out of his league, she was barely from the same planet.

And it was Simon´s birthday, the last person that he wanted to be thinking about was his former best friend, his first love. But it was all he could think about, every class, every subject, all that filled his mind was the idea that Grace was going to be everything that she was destined to be all along and he wouldn't even have the privilege of her friendship while she did it. SImon needed something else, something to snap him from his absolutely miserable state, to remind him that she wasn't the topic for that day.

He was lucky he had Kayla, lucky that she was so astute, so good at recognizing when he was off and pulling him back to reality. She'd noticed in their shared class that he was off the moment he walked in, and Simon could tell that she'd clocked it from the slightly askew look that she shot him the second he walked in. He decided from that look that he must have been obvious in his existential nightmare if it was showing so plainly on his face. She walked over to him and as if to test the waters began with the typical birthday spiel.

¨Happy birthday!” she´d said planting a kiss on his cheek and handing him what was evidently his gift. Simon took it and began to open it. This seemed to be the proof she needed because she stopped him and looked at Simon deep in his eyes. ¨That's not a gift, it's a pencil case.¨ she said matter of factly and as Simon looked down he was surprised to see that she was right. ¨I wanted to see if you would even notice and you did not.¨ she said, ¨What's wrong?¨ she added a bit softer and more kind. Simon let out a sigh.

¨I'm just feeling a little off today.¨ he explained and she gave him a serious look.

¨Are you sure that's it?” she asked and Simon gaver her a nod.

¨Yes I´m sure,¨ he said and he felt awful because it was a blatant lie. But Simon didn't know what else to say, he liked Kayla, maybe even loved her. When things were good between them they were amazing, and they made each other happy. She was happy. What was the point of telling her the truth, that he was upset because he missed Grace so much and didn't want her to leave, when all that would do would be to cause conflict. He didn't want to fight with Kayla, didn't want to upset her, so he lied.

¨Well, good because I´ve got tons of fun stuff planned for your birthday!¨ Kayla said happily and Simon nodded equally happily because this was exactly what he needed, something fun and light and uncomplicated. That was why he loved being with Kayla so much, they were a lot alike, they were uncomplicated. Of course that was unless he made them complicated by bringing Grace into the mix, so he didn´t. The rest of the day was painfully slow as he did his best to mimic his regular routines and not think about Grace.

Whenever he was with Kayla things were fine because he was thoroughly and utterly isolated from any of his thoughts about Grace but other than that he had to fight his own mental battles. When the day finally drew to a close she was already waiting for him at his locker, car keys in hand. Simon grabbed the things he needed from his locker and left the things he didn't behind before playfully making a grab for the keys. Kayla laughed as she kept in her hands and stuck out her tongue playing a game of keep away.

¨Aww come on let me drive!¨ he asked jokingly as she laughed at him.

¨Nice try, but I've been in driving school since freshman year and got my license at the beginning of this year, you just got your permit. In conclusion there is no way you're driving my car.¨ she said mockingly. The two headed out to her car and Simon pretended to be angry as he sat in the passenger seat. As the two drove out they talked casually and Simon posed a question.

¨So, do I get a present or was the pencil case my present?¨ he asked and Kayla let out a laugh.

¨You have a present, but you have to be patient.¨ she explained and Simon shot back a retort.

¨If I didn't know better I'd say you didn't get me a gift and are now stalling for time.¨ he said and Kayla snickered before responding again.

¨When will you learn patience, young one?¨ she asked and Simon continued their back and forth.

¨You know, just because your parents had sex before my parents did does not mean you gained wisdom.¨ he responded and Kayla playfully chastised him for the comment. When they arrived at their location Simon was a bit surprised to see what she'd done. Kayla had set up a picnic at the park for the two of them.

¨I know it's not very flashy or anything but-¨ she began before Simon cut her off.

¨It's perfect, I love it.¨ he said and meant it. 

¨Really?¨ she asked and Simon nodded his head. The two sat down to enjoy their date together for his birthday and enjoyed the natural flow of conversation. This whole thing was easy, and Simon was glad that it was. No stress, no questions, just two people who got each other. As they talked Kayla made her way closer to him seating wise until they were pressed close to each other. She was talking about something unrelated, but she looked so lovely, eyes sparkling in that light that Simon kissed her.

The previous kisses Simon had were all fairly chaste comparatively. Simple pecks on the mouth to punctuate dates and nice moments, but there was something else in that moment that Simon was trying to get out. The passion was evident as his tongue entered her mouth and the kiss was deepened, far more involved and passionate than previous experiences. The heat grew exponentially between them and it seemed as though it might go even further, that was until Simon broke the kiss suddenly. 

¨You want to go and do something else?” he asked and Kayla let out a sigh of relief.

¨Yeah, doing something else sounds great.¨ she responded before getting up to pack up all of the remaining items from their date. Simon felt like a mess. He should be in love with Kayla, he should have wanted things to go further than they did, he shouldn't have wanted to stop. But he had, and the reasons why he had weren't implications he was interested in exploring. Him and his girlfriend had been about to do, something, and he'd stopped it like an idiot. At least he hadn't been the only one uncomfortable as Kayla seemed to be relieved at not going further.

Still, Simon didn't like the fact that he didn't feel in control of where his relationship was going. He knew that he should want to, from all obvious perspectives he liked Kayla, she liked him, and yet when he should have been thinking about her and only her he wasn´t. At the worst possible time Simon was thinking of Grace Monroe. It was his birthday and he was thinking about Grace Monroe, and he hated it.


End file.
